Gut Rumbles

February 05, 2008

Slobber in my ears

Originally published December 20, 2003

I let the boys out of prison to eat supper this evening, and as soon as they were finished with the meal, they launched a Wet Willie attack on me. They are getting smarter and stronger. I almost lost that battle.

They put me in a pincher movement, where I was surrounded. If I went for Quinton, Jack got me from behind. If I went for Jack, Quinton did the same thing. I finally grabbed them both and wrestled them to the floor, where I extracted my revenge. They went down fighting, still poking slobber-covered fingers at my ears until I subdued them and made them cry "UNCLE!" three times before I let them up.

I am getting too old for this shit. My back still hurts and both of those boys are like coiled springs-- nothing but muscle and bone. A year ago, I could handle them with one hand. Now, they are on the verge of learning to whup my ass. I need to find a graceful way to bow out of these rasslin' games before I start to lose.

I also need to wash the Wet Willie slobber out of my ears.

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