Gut Rumbles

August 17, 2008


Originally published June 25, 2004

I went to Wal-Mart today and bought three things. The first was a new electric beard-trimmer, because my old Sunbeam died on me and I'm looking pretty scruffy nowadays. The second was a very good Spanish-English/English-Spanish dictionary that I intend to study before I go back to Costa Rica. The third was (and I STILL don't know what possessed me to BUY it) a HIGH-POWERED, CARPET STEAM-CLEANER!!!!

Maybe some long-repressed domestic instinct raised its ugly head in the depths of my psyche. Maybe my undiscovered Feminine Side finally emerged from where its been buried for 52 years. Maybe I just got tired of looking at what once was beige carpet but now appears to be buffalo hide, laid out after a good rut in the mud by a very nasty animal.

Whatever my reasons, I bought the damned thing. I've taken nothing but the instruction book out of the box so far, and that'll probably be enough for today. I got tired of doing housework just from reading the book. I may NEVER take the actual machine out of the box.

Hell--- now that I think about it, I kinda LIKE the dirty buffalo hide on the floor.

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