Gut Rumbles

March 04, 2006

i think i'm gonna live

I'm MUCH better now than what I was. Of course, I could say that as fact if I had DIED last night, but I believe that I'm through hugging the toilet for a while. I feel pretty good now.

I'm convinced that not drinking alcohol poisoned me. Before, I've always put enough high-octane hootch in my belly to kill any nasty bacteria lurking in the food or water here. This time, I relied on my built-in immune system to protect me, and that pussy-assed, "natural" anti-shit failed me in the pinch. I was bad-off for a while there. I don't want to experience that gut-rumble again, but I'm still not gonna drink. I gotta be tough, even if it kills me.

I'm going out to gamble tonight, and I have a "date" arranged for later in the evening. A little taste of the sweet tica might cure everything that's wrong with me, even if I lose money in the casino. It damn sure won't hurt. Besides... I can't be around this many beautiful wimmen without lusting in my heart. Here, when I lust in my heart, I get laid out of my pants.

Maybe I'll take some pictures...


You BETTER take some pics! But, not of you and tha tica doin the" horizontal bop".
Glad you're better.

Posted by: Lil Toni on March 4, 2006 07:37 PM

Look on the bright side.

The natives all have a different assortment of bugs in their digestive systems that digest the food than you do -- or did before this. "Montezuma's Revenge" comes from not having any of the local gut flora. The new bugs get in and run wild for a while in their new environment. It's a consequence of excessive sanitation in Georgia.

Now you have some local Costa Rican bugs, and should be able to cope better. Not perfectly, but then even natives get sick now and again.

All bets are off if you get amoebic dysentery -- the amoebas aren't normal for anybody and you can't get accustomed or immune to them. But you didn't have that, because you aren't still sick.

And look forward to a milder case of the same thing when you get home. You now have Tico intestines. Jawja is different (as you just found out) and you'll have to readjust. Unless, of course, you just build a house there.


Posted by: Ric Locke on March 4, 2006 09:51 PM

I don't lust in my heart. I lust in my dick.

Posted by: Elisson on March 5, 2006 12:30 AM

jRic's got a good point. When I was in the navy, we'd pull in somewhere like the Philippines and I'd get the craps the 1st night there and be fine the rest of the time. Then back on board ship it would start up again only milder.
I think Ellison forgets that lust starts in the brain then goes to the heart and then heads south.

Posted by: RayH on March 5, 2006 02:47 AM

Sometimes it is just a change in the chemicals in the drinking water that will do it and sometimes it is the bugs in the groceries. After I get over it I am fine until I go someplece else with different water and bugs in the groceries. And you are right I think, back when I kept my stomach pickled in alcohol I never had that problem although when I wasn't drunk I was hungover so maybe I did and blamed it on the alcohol shits.

Posted by: GUYK on March 5, 2006 08:30 AM

I was also thinking you got sick because you didn't have the alcohol factor going for you anymore. Avoid the street vendors and you'll be okay.

Hope you had fun with your tica. La vida es bueno, no?

Posted by: Libby on March 5, 2006 08:44 AM

.. I told you to watch out for those tropical fruits... last time it was a mugging... this time, a poisoning.... they're out to get you...

Posted by: Eric on March 5, 2006 09:44 AM

Not that we don't believe you, but any photo's?

Posted by: upnorfdude on March 5, 2006 12:00 PM

You need to eat more of your own boogers, as well as any food that falls on the floor. Your immune system would not be so pussy-assed. You get the added benefit of recycling whatever nutrients are in your boogers.

Posted by: Jordan on March 5, 2006 01:31 PM
Post a comment

*Note: If you are commenting on an older entry, your
comment will not appear until it has been approved.
Do not resubmit it.