Gut Rumbles

July 21, 2005

for "psychologists"

Mama's sister, my Aunt Jenetta, died in 1992, the same year my father made his exit from life. She sent me a card about two weeks before she died. It contained a very touching note, and I was moved to tears when I read it.

At the bottom, she said, "If you want to remember me, put up a bird feeder and kill a cat."

'Netta loved her birds and hated the cats that stalked and killed them. I've ALWAYS had bird feeders in my yard since then. I like my birds, too.

And I'll give any cat who comes around here on a bird-hunt a taste of something it won't like. If that makes me a potential serial killer, I certainly fit the profile. But it's about time I upgraded a bit. That pellet gun is just too merciful. "Beth" is correct. I shouldn't be shooting cats with a pellet gun.

I'm going with the silent .22s from now own. I'll NEVER have to shoot the same cat twice that way.


Two words.........00 buckshot

Posted by: gravdigr on July 21, 2005 12:12 PM

I knew you would eventually get it right.
use hollowpoints, less chance of a ricochet.
shoot 'em on the ground, don't put that round in the air.

Posted by: GrampaPinhead on July 21, 2005 12:16 PM

I like cats

I like birds (have even been known to pick off a squirrel or two out of the birdfeeders)

Yes, I like birds, which is why my two cats remain inside

End of problem

And people who TRULY love their cats would keep theirs inside too.

Buckshot is only one risk a cat faces.....there's also cars, coyotes, and OTHER cats...

Posted by: Ruth on July 21, 2005 12:17 PM

Get some CCI, .22 CB longs. Those things are whisper quiet, but will go all the way through a soup can filled with water. I love'um for stealth shooting!

Posted by: Ed on July 21, 2005 12:28 PM

your aunt was probably drunk when she wrote that.
what she meant was, put a bell on a collar around the neck of a cat so both cats (too dumb to know) and birds can live side by side.

I'm surprised you don't do this already. They teach it in Kindergarten up here in civilization.

Posted by: yea, yea, yea on July 21, 2005 12:45 PM

My neighbour's cat has got four of those little round bells on its collar and jingles like crazy most of the day, except when it stalks a bird.
Then it sneaks that quietly that the bells won't ring until the cat jumps and it's too late for the bird.

I'd shoot the cat, but it is fun to watch. I guess I'm one of Ruth's sociopio...sopioc... crazy bastards.

Posted by: Henry Blowfly on July 21, 2005 12:52 PM

I've got six cats. They are all good mousers and rabbit hunters. I've also got a nest of Starlings they can't get to, although they do catch the occasional bird. I really don't see what the big deal is. Fowl are for eating!

Posted by: Ed on July 21, 2005 12:57 PM

hey! Thats not me calling cat killers socio-paths!

It was Beth!

I dont care what happens to other peoples cats, if they cared about them, they'd keep them inside!

Its all about meeeee (and my And my cats are sleeping here, in the windowsill, safe and sound!

Posted by: Ruth on July 21, 2005 12:58 PM

Let me put it this way: how would you feel if someone killed your dog?

Some cats are really good pets. They come when you call them, they show you genuine affection, and keep you good company. Children get really, really attached to them.

Cats are also territorial. A pellet gun should be sufficient to show them where the line is.

I'm not saying you should never kill a cat. If some alley-cat squats in your back yard and makes itself a nuisance, well that's just vermin.

Just think before you shoot, is all.

Posted by: dipnut on July 21, 2005 02:56 PM

LOL I'm amazed at how you can fit "shooting a cat" into just about any post

Posted by: Robert on July 21, 2005 02:58 PM

DIPNUT- if somebody shooys my dog while it is taking a dump in their flower beds I will not say a word because it is my fault for not teaching the dog to stary home and shit in its own flower beds. I killed a cat yesterday in my rose bed. Scratched my hands on the fucking thorns pulling the nasty bastard out from under a bush. The cowardly owner didn't put a collar on the cat so I had no place to take it but to the land fill. Just to let the neighbors know if they happen to be reading I will shoot their dogs, their cats, and maybe them if I catch them taking a shot in my rose bed.

Posted by: GUYK on July 21, 2005 03:07 PM

As I told you before Rob, if you need ANY practice with more targets please come to our end of the county. The asses that live on either side don't "take care" of all these damn strays, they just feed them, let the reproduce and that's it. Where do they come to shit, f**k, fight and wail? My house, usually when Joey's at work and I don't want to scare the kids by having dead carcasses for him to clean up. Although....Nicklaus said he'd bury however many I shot....damn, that boy's daddy is teaching him right...

Posted by: Kellie on July 21, 2005 03:21 PM

I'm with DIPNUT on this one. Think before you shoot. No use killing every got-dam thing that moves just because you're to fucking lazy to spray it with the waterhose. I like cats. Fuck you cat hating jackasses.

Posted by: assrot on July 21, 2005 03:38 PM

We have at least a dozen cats at the boat dealership I work at, they live in the junk boats at the back of the lot. We don't have a rodent problem (except for the 3 big groundhogs), and we don't have a cat reproduction problem, cuz we got them all fixed. They roam some, but it's an industrial area so no problem. I wish they would get some of the friggin starlings, what a pain in the ass they are, crapping on the boats under the roof outside. The pigeons too.

Posted by: Horrabin on July 21, 2005 08:48 PM

I found out by accident (when I was a kid) that the best 'cat round' is a .22 LR birdshot round.

I saw this cat at least 100 or more feet away, and for some reason I wanted to scare it, not kill it. So I loaded that crimped birdshot round into my rifle and fired straight at it, figuring to 'dust' it.

Well, I dusted it all right, dusted it OFF. That cat jumped up into the air about 5 feet, and came down dead. I ran over, and it wasn't even twitching. A hole through its ribs you could put a finger in.

I'm glad I figurred out those rounds were dangerous before I shot one of my friends in the ass for a joke.

What I like about those birdshot rounds is that they are right-now lethal, and there's no danger of a bullet going on through and putting a hole in something you give a shit about.

Posted by: Bane on July 21, 2005 09:46 PM

I'm with ED, if you gotta shoot 'em CB longs in a rifle are quiet and effective. I live in a city with a leash law and an animal control (oxymoron alert!) dept. that keeps bankers hours. I have asshat neighbors who let their dogs (and cats) out at night to roam and let them in in the morning before the animal control pukes have finished their coffee. I have had to fence my garden because my asshat neighbors won't fence their yards or keep their animals at home. CB caps are quiet and effective. Don't take any pleasure in this but grew tired of being robbed of my garden's pleasures, dogding dogshit when walking in MY yard to say nothing of the odd hole dug for no apparent reason. The squirrels did NOT make those holes. Too bad the dogs and cats aren't good eating like tree rat. Can't have everything. Don't have hardly enough room in the house for the crap I got. So I sent some off.

Posted by: Jim on July 22, 2005 12:06 PM
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