Gut Rumbles

July 10, 2005

maybe if i were really stoned...

I've never played any of these games and I don't think I have any desire to, either. They sound 'way too pussified and designed to make me sing out my FEEEEEEELINGS as I get in touch with my feminine side.

Fuck that. I'd rather bankrupt you at monopoly, destroy your armies and sieze your land at Risk (while I listen to the lamentations of your wimmen), take all your money at poker or sink your armada at Battleship. Playing old-fashioned, co-ed Twister, with everybody nekkid and greased-up with Wesson oil isn't bad, either. But "Moods?" I don't think so.

Hell... when I was young, "Operation" was too tame for me. I didn't give a shit whether I killed my patient or not.


Risk definately kicks ass. I grew up with my parents staing up and playing till two or three in the morning. I finally got my son interested, but noone else in the house likes it, so it gets to be really stale with just two people after awhile. Not to mention the fact that I just am not able to stay up that damn late anymore unless I am on vacation. Hell, I get up for work at 4:30am every day.

Posted by: Richard on July 10, 2005 08:29 PM

Scrabble anyone? That was always my favorite...

Posted by: Ruth on July 10, 2005 08:37 PM

I LOVED Risk as a teenager. We'd get into world domination mode and play for days at a time. They've got a Lord of the Rings version of Risk that I'm coveting. I'm hoping my oldest son will be able to play it soon.

Posted by: Chablis on July 10, 2005 08:39 PM

I always killed my patients also...nothing like a red lit-up nose and a huge buzzing sound to know it's time to pull the

Posted by: Kellie on July 10, 2005 09:29 PM

Well, fuck.

Nobody will play any of them other games with me, 'cause I usually will kick everyone's ass. So what's left? Alla that touchy-feely shit.

And if you think Risk is fun, beating the other guy senseless with alla them little wooden armies (it is!), how 'bout chess? Chess is nothing less than total war on a little board. There's nothing like crushing someone's nuts on a chessboard - no element of chance, just intellect vs intellect.

Posted by: Elisson on July 10, 2005 10:15 PM

As Fred one told Ricky: "Ric, if I could get in touch with my feminine side, I wouldn't need Ethel."

Posted by: Circa Bellum on July 11, 2005 09:41 AM

Anybody ever played "Planetary Risk"? you get three boards and as many players as you can. Split up into three separate games. Once you've conquered the Planet, you can go at one or both of the other boards. Killer fun and quite insane. Can last several days. Especially if chemicals are involved.

Posted by: DaneBramage on July 11, 2005 12:10 PM

There is a reason I always have a deck of Fluxx cards in the car. (Simple game, but complex.) For fast enjoyable games, you can't beat Munchkin (Kill the monsters, steal the loot, backstab your buddies), Lord of the Fries (Fast Food in Hell), Ninja Burger (Your meal in 30 minutes or we commit seppiku), Chez Geek. For board games, just look at Catan or Cheapass.

I just spent waaaaaaaay to much money at Origins last weekend, so have new games coming out my wazuu.

Posted by: Mythilt on July 11, 2005 12:39 PM
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