Gut Rumbles

June 11, 2005

a ceaseless quest...

I'm gonna piss some more people off here. I don't drink a lot of beer anymore, but when I DO drink beer, I want a REAL beer. I brewed my own for a long time and I think that's how I learned to tell the difference between possum-piss and REAL beer.

NO domestic beer in the United States is REAL beer. For one thing, it's all lager. It's ALL possum-piss, and the only reason I can see people drinking it is because it has alcohol in it. Don't tell me that Budweiser, Coors, Miller or Pabst is beer. It's NOT. It's possum- piss. And if you put a "Lite" label on it, it goes from possum-piss to pure skunk-water.

I've said before that I don't like snobs, but I suppose I AM a beer-snob. When I buy beer, I want something that tastes like BEER, not possum-piss or skunk-water. Here are my favorites:

1) Sam Adams Ale

2) Shiner Bock (or anything by Shiner)

3) Bass Ale

4) Guinness Stout

5) Black and Tan Ale (you can get that custom-poured in a bar, but it comes in bottles, too)

6) Red Stripe (Jamacia)

7) Imperial (Costa Rica)

8) Pete's Wicked Pale Ale

9) Red Elephant Amber Bock

10) Anchor Steam

As far as true domestic beers go, I'll drink 'em, but I don't believe that they are very good. Rolling Rock is okay, and so is Michelob dark. Iron City once was pretty good, before that brewery went out of business after it drowned in possum-piss competition.

I suppose I'm just strange. I believe that beer should taste like something more than tap-water with bubbles in it.


I think all beer smells like skunk

Posted by: livey on June 11, 2005 09:14 PM

Try a beer called 'Anchor Steam'. Probably the only decent thing to come out of San Francisco. Very hard to get, but once you've had it, you'll order it by the case.

Posted by: Bane on June 11, 2005 09:22 PM

Uh.... Bane.... that one was on my list.

Posted by: Acidman on June 11, 2005 09:37 PM

My favorite everyday beers are Shiner and the Spaten brews:

Posted by: U on June 11, 2005 09:49 PM

Unless you're thinking of another beer by the same name, Iron City is still around, at least in Pittsburgh. Or do you mean that the beer itself changed at some point? I'd believe the latter, especially considering how many times the brewery changed hands in the 80s and 90s.

Posted by: Tom on June 11, 2005 09:50 PM

The only beers I drink are:
Guinness Stout and Killian Irish Red. Nothing else is worth it.

Posted by: Alli on June 11, 2005 10:02 PM

You actually like Imperial? Wow, I guess there's a first time for everything.

About the only thing I've used that stuff for is to get good and sauced.

Posted by: Mr. Lion on June 11, 2005 10:24 PM

If you ever get a chance try a Belgian beer like Chimay.

Posted by: Robert on June 11, 2005 10:41 PM

I've had most of the brews on that list, and they're pretty much all good to excellent.

Spend any time at all in Belgium, and you won't go near Coors and its like again. Them people respect they beer...and drink more per capita than any other place on Earth.

Posted by: Elisson on June 11, 2005 10:44 PM

You don't drink German beer? What going on with that?

Posted by: Yabu on June 11, 2005 10:45 PM

You gotta like Negra Modelo. The only thing worth a chit that comes from Mexico.
I forgot tequila. But, this is a beer thread.

Posted by: Dan on June 11, 2005 10:49 PM

You're so right! I'm a 42 year old woman, but you won't catch me drinking possum piss.

Posted by: beloml on June 11, 2005 10:53 PM

Thanks to Tex, at, I was introduced to a great Australian ale, Cooper's Sparkling Ale.

BTW, he's on Acidman's "Furriners I Like" link list.

Posted by: Ernie G on June 11, 2005 11:02 PM

Anchor Steam is a lager. Fermented with a lager yeast, anyways.

Posted by: Arcs on June 11, 2005 11:15 PM

Rob, you do know Anchor Steam is brewed in San Francisco, don't you?

Posted by: RG on June 11, 2005 11:23 PM

I'm partial to Amber Ales, two I like are Breckinridge Brewery's "Avalanche", and Belgium Brewing's "Fat Tire"

Posted by: bottlestop on June 11, 2005 11:39 PM

I have had every beer on your list many times and I drank Shiner Bock when they only came in returnable longneck bottles and you could only get em' here in Texas back then, but I always came back to my ice cold skunk water everytime.......Milwaukee's Best Light. Try bellying up to the bar and ordering one of your fancy beers in this little town I live in and you'll be shown the door headfirst.

Posted by: PJ on June 12, 2005 01:01 AM

I have had every beer on your list and I also drank Shiner Bock when they only came in returnable longneck bottles and you could only get em' here in Texas back then, but I always came back to my ice cold skunk water everytime.......Milwaukee's Best Light. Try bellying up to the bar and ordering one of your fancy beers in this little town where I live and you'll be shown the door headfirst.

Posted by: PJ on June 12, 2005 01:03 AM

This shit also makes you repeat things alot too......hehe!! Or did I say that already?

Posted by: PJ on June 12, 2005 01:05 AM

It's all about taste and preference, really. Some choose lite beer because they really don't care for the taste of a strong substance and some, like me, choose lite because of the caloric intake. It's odd that a post about beer would be the one that finally turned me off this blog but during the past few weeks I've found the intolerance more and more disturbing, not to mention the derogatory comments regarding "wimmen", so I'm going to call it a day but wish you continued success with those who are likeminded.

Posted by: Leggy on June 12, 2005 01:39 AM

PJ, we have some unfinished business on this thread Just a reminder.

Posted by: StinKerr on June 12, 2005 02:23 AM

"Life's too short to drink cheap beer", and by cheap beer you know what I mean.

As far as readily available brands go, Beck's Dark comes awfully close to perfection for me. Killian's Red is good too, and (I'm almost embarrased to say) Michelob's Amber Bock is darn good for a domestic mass market beer.

But there's lots of domestic microbrewery beer that is fantastic. I wouldn't sell all American beers too short.

Posted by: Desert Cat on June 12, 2005 03:15 AM

Can't stand mainstream American beers. Don't drink much anymore, but I have gotten picky as I have gotten older. Just bought a bottle of British stout called St. Peter's Cream Stout . Haven't opened it yet, saving it for a relaxer in the middle of the work week. Will let you know how it is.
With so many great domestic microbrews and foreign beers why would anyone drink the mainstream piss?

Posted by: Ray on June 12, 2005 03:53 AM

After spending some years in Germany it was hard to get used to the American beer again. Don't drink any of it now but there used to be a comparable called Schmidts that I found in the midwest. Used to judge a beer by how it tasted at room temperature-say 65 to 70 degrees. If its drinable warm then it will be good cold.

If you really want something different try some San Miguel from the Phillipines.

Posted by: GUYK on June 12, 2005 08:23 AM


Alli? Killians and Guiness are both colostomy squeezings in my book. Irish douche. As a matter of fact, all things Irish gag me.

Fat Tire is only tolerable while eating food, preferrably greasy food. It is too 'rich' to just pound by the pitcher, IMO.

Sam Adams, Pete's, and Anchor Steam are the only ones on the list I can tolerate, but then again, I like beer from the yellow (or white) cans that say 'BEER' on the sides.

Or Lucky Lager.

And tru dat about Belgian beers. Sadly, $7 a bottle is too rich for my blood alcohol content.

Posted by: Bane on June 12, 2005 09:34 AM

Sierra Nevada Pale Ale is my brew of choice.

Posted by: Max on June 12, 2005 09:39 AM

For me, there are two categories of beer:

1. Lawnmower Beers.

There is a time and place for cheap beers, and this is it. Apply the same standard for anytime that you're quaffing the suds for relief or just using the liquid to mindlessley wash down food-on-the-go, etc. I like cheap beers while breaking a sweat over the BBQ, working on the boat, etc.

2. Good Times Brews.

This is when Rob's list comes in. When I can sit down, relax and truly appreciate what's in that dollar-or-more bottle of nectar.

Usually accompanied by at least, a fine cigar, and hopefully, a fine female, but that's another thread altogether. *grin*

My (fine-beer) list would include Sapporo (Japan), Moretti (Italy) and if you can find it, true Kirin (again, Japan). Negra Modelo is perhaps the world's smoothest brew, and is superb.

How the same brewery that makes swampsauce like Corona can make such a delight as Negra Modelo.....well.... just keep in mind that Corona is the trendy beer of choice among the yuppified sheeple at the local fern bars.

Sadly, all the Kirin I see around nowdays comes from the Molson brewery in Canada. It might say "Kirin" on the label, but it's not even remotely the same as the real thing.

Which brings up another point. In the days of my yoot, cheap beers such as Hamm's and Olympia were excellent. Olympia was brewed in Tumwater, WA...(their motto; "It's the Water!" I don't recall Hamm's origins, but it was good, too.

Nowdays, if I pick up a can of Oly..... it is sadly, from the queen of all piss-poor beers, the Pearl Brewery in San Antonio. And it tastes just like that recycled dogwater, too.

Used to be, good and cheap regional beers were an adventure to themselves. Now though, they're mostly all just McBeer.


Sloop New Dawn
Galveston, TX

Posted by: Jim on June 12, 2005 10:37 AM

all bocks are excellent. i just brewed a batch of danish elephant beer. excellent, also 7.5 % of the good stuff.

Posted by: other brother daryl on June 12, 2005 11:42 AM

I cook my corned beef in Guiness Stout.

Posted by: Maeve on June 12, 2005 12:03 PM

Killian's is bad American beer made with darker malt so it looks like it has flavor. Close your eyes, and it might as well be Bud.

I don't buy the "lawnmower beer" v. actual beer dichotomy. If beer is bad, it's bad all the time, not just when you're sitting down for serious drinking. If you want a lighter beer in hot weather, get Corona or Presidente or some other low-budget Latin American beer. It may not be great, but it beats the hell out of Bud and Coors.

The only cheap lager I ever managed to drink without gagging was Stroh's. Can't get it around here, though, and wouldn't if I could.

I just brewed an American-style lager to tempt and convert Bud-drinkers. It's surprising how much you can improve American-style beer simply by removing the rice and adding a small amount of hops. But that would cost Anheuser-Busch three extra cents on a case, and it would scare the pansies who are frightened by beer you can taste, i.e. 75% of the American public. So it will never happen.

Posted by: Steve H. on June 12, 2005 01:32 PM

I've never cared for beer. But I always seem to gravitate toward people who do! My boss claims that Belgian beer is the best. Robert has tried a few. He likes Fosters. He also likes St. Pauli Girl (and I like the bottles, extra bonus when he's done!).

But honestly, I didn't think people drank beer for the taste; I thought it was more for the "buzz".

I will say that I can make a mean mess of beer batter biscuits! Not that there's any leftover beer in the house.... ;-)

Posted by: Joni on June 12, 2005 03:04 PM

Hamm's Beer..."From the land of sky blue waters"...."Comes the taste that's so refreshing.."
Years ago, it was the Hamm's Beer Bear, and the Chicago Cubs....And used to put away my share of Stroh's too (Czech that I am)...Sadly , I don't know if they make it any more (and if so, it is not the original brewers). Anchor Steam and Sam Addams are great. But I have to side with Jim...if all I am doing is working up an honest sweat...a cheap brew does the trick. When I am more relaxed, whether reading a good book, or about to do some serious damage to a steak...then bring on the good stuff. (and used to drink Kirin while stationed in was great about 25 years ago.)

Posted by: Guy S on June 12, 2005 04:23 PM

Make it another vote for New Belgium's Fat Tire - good in the bottle, better in a growler from the brewery. Colorado's a great state and not just because of the mountains (or the Taxpayer's Bill of Rights too)... ah, good beer.

Posted by: andy on June 12, 2005 04:51 PM

I can think of few beers that I actually won't drink and don't have a particular brand loyalty. My main preferences would be tap over bottle and heavy on the hops.

In the Pacific Northwest (I live in Portland), we have a well developed micro-brew and home-brew drinking culture. There is so damn much good beer out here and most serious drinkers like to check out the latest concoctions from various brewers.

The Belgian lambic beers are definitely worth a taste. They use aged hops and the beer is aged for about two years in oak casks. No yeast is added; they rely on natural airborne yeast during brewing to achieve fermentation.These lambics are truly the champagne of bottled beer (Hey! that might make a good slogan!). Try Lindemans.

Posted by: Andrew Collins on June 12, 2005 07:20 PM

Almost exactly what I said on a comment a while back :) Years back, I used to rent out rooms to students from the USA, usually they were either too young to drink legally there, or were only used to possum-piss, and I thought it was rather funny to watch them keel over after half a pint of Real Beer. I have an odd sense of humour btw. Acidman, have you ever been the England and tried the beers here?

Posted by: Misty on June 13, 2005 08:21 AM

We have a local brewery in Cleveland called Great Lakes. They make a good beer called Dortmunder Gold. Will send you some if you want to try it.

Posted by: Jilly on June 13, 2005 09:45 AM

You are sooooo right! Go to the EU and drink the beer. You'll never drink this possum piss again!

Posted by: Ed on June 13, 2005 10:07 AM

Not a bad list, especially Shiner Bock (or Shocker Bocker, as the wife calls it after an afternoon of enjoying them). Here's a couple more to try:

1. Penn Pilsner- from the same general area as Rolling Rock, but way WAY better.

2. Pretty much anything from 3 Floyds brewing out of Northern Indiana (?)- Robert the Bruce is good, Alpha King is great.

3. Anything from Bell's out of Kalamazoo- Bell's Amber, Oberon, name it- it's all REAL good. Am firmly convinced they put some sort of heroin concentrate in their hops, the stuff is just a bit addicting.

4. Goose Island out of Chicago is okay- Honker's ale ain't bad, think they make a red something or other. Put 'em on a par with Sierra Nevada or Anchor Steam.

5. Boddinton's

6. Old Speckled Hen

7. Molson Brador- not the crap assed stuff made in the U.S. on Molson's behalf, but the stuff out of Canada. Their health care blows and they can't say about, but they make some righteous feckin' beer up in Canuckistan.

8. Spaten Optimator- can be drunk or used as a good base for a mulch pit. A bit hearty, good for the holidays.

9. Leinenkugel- out of Wisconsin. Make a whole bunch of stuff, apparently their Honey Weiss is good if you like weissbeir. Leinie Red is the official beer of Lawnmowing, any fool will tell you that.


Posted by: 2BrixShy on June 14, 2005 09:04 AM

Fat Tire Belgian style Ale.

Posted by: sefton on June 14, 2005 05:22 PM
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