Gut Rumbles
 

April 29, 2005

Country entertainment

I had a friend who owned some goats and one really slutty dog. I enjoyed going by his house to drink beer and bullshit with him on the porch. He farmed about 30 acres, and I usually ended up with a sack of Silver Queen corn, a bunch of squash or a bundle of green peanuts to go with my beer-buzz whenever I visited.

But that's not why I went over there. I enjoyed his company and the beer was good, but the best thing of all was watching one of the goats fuck that dog. The dog was a slut and goats are goats. The combination makes for wonderful entertainment.

The dog was fairly good-sized, with a lot of pit bull somewhere in its heritage. But it had the morals of $2 cow-town whore. She'd fuck a goat anytime. In fact, I think she LIKED being fucked by goats, and a goat will fuck anything that holds still long enough.

I remember Frank saying, "Watch this. Dolly is about to get drilled." And sure enough, that's just what happened. A goat would mount her, start doing his thing, and Dolly would never move--- just make some "oof" and "oomph" noises while the goat enjoyed his pleasure.

Dolly used to gang-bang the entire herd while I sat on the porch and watched.

Drink beer with a friend and enjoy the show. It's quite impressive if you're in the right frame of mind. I KNOW that it's unnatural and against all the preachings of Jesus, but watching a goat fuck a dog is amusing, as long as it's done with mutual consent from both partners and nobody gets hurt.

Dolly didn't seem to mind. The goats certainly didn't mind. I called it no harm, no foul. Besides, it was one hell of a show.

I staggered away from Frank's place many a day thinking, "I know wimmen just like that dog."

Comments

You just haaaaad to go and throw in that last line, didn'tcha?!!

Posted by: Alaska Kim on April 29, 2005 06:24 PM

Yes. That last line was a "must."

Posted by: Acidman on April 29, 2005 06:31 PM

You are getting to be too predictable!

Posted by: Alaska Kim on April 29, 2005 06:51 PM

Yeah me too, my ex sister in law.
I used to have a "house" rabbit that would fuck my cat.

Posted by: Maeve on April 29, 2005 06:51 PM

I've got a buddy with a mammoth Jack (large male donkey) and a bunch of mules. A couple of weeks ago we came in from riding a couple of his mules and for some reason those mules coming back made that Jack start acting like a drunken sailor on R&R...he has a pecker that I swear is 4 feet long and it was hard as a rock. As soon as those mules got back in the feedlot with that Jack he pointed that thing straight at one of them, which happened to be a big horse mule (male mule). Dumb gay ass sumbitch tried to mount him over and over and the whole time that mule was kicking the shit out of him with both barrels. It was funnier than hell. He got his ass so worked up and beat up that I think it just turned him on even more.

Yep, I know what you mean...that was pretty good beer drinkin country entertainment too.

Posted by: marcl on April 29, 2005 07:12 PM

God! That is funny!

Posted by: vince on April 29, 2005 07:39 PM

"A good goat will do that."

Posted by: BlogDog on April 29, 2005 09:14 PM

Hell if you drive about an hour and a half south of where I live and just barely get into Mexico, you can see a human woman do the same thing for a couple US Dollars... although they use donkies, not goats.

Posted by: Jason on April 29, 2005 09:24 PM

It was a good thing the Rebellion was put down.

Hey, I hear Atlanta became the very thing you butternut boys tried to prevent. By your own kin-folk. Go figure.

Posted by: General Sherman on April 29, 2005 09:34 PM

General, ain't you supposed to be living in hell? Or can't you find anybody to rent Texas from you?

Posted by: McGehee on April 29, 2005 11:10 PM

"I know wimmen just like that dog."

Me too. And I thank God for them every day.

Posted by: rightisright on April 30, 2005 12:22 AM
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