Gut Rumbles

March 17, 2005

a crying shame

I saw this crap for years. I would stop by Harry's Liquor Store on President Street after I got off work. The sidewalks were filled with young black men, all wearing baggy pants that hung below their butt-cheeks and boxer drawers that went clean up the their armpits. They were rude, crude, and obscene.

A typical conversation went something like this: "Shut the FUCK UP, N---ger! Yo lay some direspect on me and I'll pop a cap on yo black ass. Muthafucka. I got a Glock. I'll shoot yo N---ger ass if you fuck with me!"

In response: "Oh yeah, muthafucka? I got a Glock, too. I be poppin' a cap in yo ass before you get a chance to shoot ME!"

"Muthafucka! I can do seven years standing on my head. I'll shoot yo muthafuckin' black ass dead."

Yeah, I saw real, live shizination for a long time. I don't find that crap amusing.

But y'all go play with the toy all you want to.


Oh, hell, man. It's fun to shizinate (or whatever) because it is painfully obvious that Snoop Dogg is a pretende gangsta, a marketer, right up until a real gangsta busts a cap in HIS ass. Then we can all laugh together.

Posted by: Velociman on March 17, 2005 07:49 PM

That jive be so outdated it crusty. We chillin like villains and jellin like felons now. Mellow luvahs, you down?

Posted by: Key on March 17, 2005 09:49 PM

You just can't that nigger out of them.

Posted by: catfish on March 17, 2005 10:03 PM

I read that the reason for the low-slung pants originated in stir: it was quicker to get them dropped for a little lovin' with that special one amongst the prison population. Baggy pants to more effectively conceal Mac10's or whatever. Try to tell this to the 14 year olds who are trying it all out for the first time. And listening to the rap and hip hop, retrograde monotonic 4th grade rhyming with no tune, no music whatsoever. I keep waiting for it to go out of style, but it's been over a decade now, and it just keeps coming back, new "lyrics", same lack of tune. Pity.

Posted by: Shep on March 17, 2005 10:11 PM

No, Key. I AIN'T down for that shit.

I think it sucks. Period.

Posted by: Acidman on March 17, 2005 10:44 PM

So, you don't like the Shizzolator. What? We can't laugh at it, either? Or, if we do, we're stupid? Naw. You know that ain't right, now.

I think this is one of those humor things, Rob. You, like most men, probably like The Three Stooges, don't you? All the guys I've ever known have...and...well, I hate that shit. I lived with stupid, slap-happy circus clowns for fifteen years, and I don't think it's fucking funny. Shudder.

But if you'll give me the shizzolator now and again, I'll let you watch Stooges in return, unmolested. Deal? ;)

Posted by: Queenie on March 17, 2005 11:14 PM

Actual, everyday assholes who live their live slanging that shit are just fucking sad.
Now Shizinating a Ted Kennedy speech: That's some funny shit (and it would probably make more sense)

Posted by: Graumagus on March 18, 2005 09:42 AM

I hired a small of group neighborhood teenagers last summer to help clean some property. They all were wearing the oversized jeans with their boxers showing. I made the statement that their inner nigga personality must be coming out. The next day they showed up in regular jeans. Now when they see me walking the neighborhood they pull up the big pants to cover their shorts. I just chuckle.

Posted by: Dan on March 18, 2005 10:18 AM

Amazing that fuck is spelled out and nigger is blanked out. Is there any other taboo word in the English language?

Posted by: GREG on March 18, 2005 11:47 AM

Yeah, there are lots of them and I'll pay no attention to the taboo. But I promised that I would never use that horrible N-word on my blog again and I keep my promises.

I still don't like that kind of language or that kind of behavior.

Posted by: Acidman on March 18, 2005 12:14 PM

I'll let the "Webster's Dictionary" answer all.
If one acts in a "NIGGARDLY" fashion, then that defines exactly what you are.

saludos from Baja, mc

Posted by: mrchuck on March 18, 2005 12:21 PM

Just another step down the ladder of evolution. Its not funny its pathetic.

Posted by: James Old Guy on March 18, 2005 01:51 PM

""They were rude, crude, and obscene.""
Isn't this exactly what Beth said about you when she first landed? Muthafucka! One doesn't have to be black to be annoying.

Posted by: Dr. Bob on March 18, 2005 02:29 PM

Rob: let us unite behind the awe and mystery of the Holy Trinity: Culry, Larry, Moe.

Posted by: Velociman on March 18, 2005 06:35 PM

none of you mout brethirs will be happy until the slave ships sale again!!!

Posted by: Um Yeah on March 19, 2005 09:27 AM

BTW: Shizzilating a Ted Kennedy speech actually makes it MORE palatable...

Posted by: Graumagus on March 19, 2005 12:49 PM
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