Gut Rumbles
 

February 10, 2005

existential question

This one is for heterosexuals only. Nah... wait a minute. I don't care which side of the plate you bat from... you can answer the questions, too. I'm just curious here.

I am a straight male and I like female boobs. I've seen some downright BEAUTIFUL boobs and some that were okay and a few that barely qualified as boobs, but I cannot recall EVER seeing a set that I thought was ugly. I like boobs. I like some better than others, but that fact doesn't change the basic premise that I LIKE BOOBS.

Now... I gotta ask you wimmen. Do you look at cocks the same way I look at boobs? You know, some are BEAUTIFUL, some are okay and THAT ONE will do because it's the only one around? I'm trying to explore the female mind here and I always get confused when I go there.

The only cock that EVER fascinated ME was my own, and I've never had an interest in another guy's cock. But you wimmen DO, and I want you to 'splain that to me. I will bare my assets first:

* I like titties with nice nipples.

* I like titties that AROUSE a woman when you play with her nipples.

* I like small titties. Anything over a handful is wasted.

* My experience has taught me that wimmen with big racks don't have sensitive nipples.

* Wimmen with big racks don't seem to care about their asses, which I happen to think is the most sexy thing on a woman.

Now, I've had my male chauvanist rant. So, YOU tell ME? (By the way... I got this idea from playing a game of poker with some wimmen and all the cards had well-hung nekkid male studs on them, and THEY started the cock-talk, not me. I just listened.)

*Are some cocks prettier than others?

* Did you ever see one that you thought was downright UGLY?

* What is the difference?

*How many of you ever saw an uncircumsized male?

* What is better--- length, width or the person it's attached to?

* Is a blow-job FUN, or do you see it as a female duty?

* You have multiple orgasms (I mean "abbadabbas") How do you do that?

Okay, you bold, liberated wimmen. Answer THOSE questions and I'll write about what I think about "choochie" later.


Comments

I don't know about the 'liberated' part, but I'm definitely bold. Here goes....

*Are some cocks prettier than others? - Absolutely.

* Did you ever see one that you thought was downright UGLY? - Absolutely. It was uncircumcised, crooked and really purple. It looked like Frankenstein's monster.

* What is the difference? - I suppose it's personal preference. One that's relatively straight and smooth without a rat's nest of pubic hair is preferred.

*How many of you ever saw an uncircumsized male? - Ex husband was one. Uh...I mean he had one. Foreskin, I mean. And, for the record, I much prefer circumcised. They're much prettier.

* What is better--- length, width or the person it's attached to? - I always said that it doesn't matter the size of the equipment, just as long as he know how to use it. The person matters more. But, girthy is nice. heh

* Is a blow-job FUN, or do you see it as a female duty? - It's fun when given freely. When it's EXPECTED is when it becomes a duty. If it's DEMANDED? He gets a kick in the balls.

* You have multiple orgasms (I mean "abbadabbas") How do you do that? - Uh..I'm not sure how I do it. I just keep going after the first one and am usually rewarded with four or five more. I think my record was seven.

Posted by: Pammy on February 10, 2005 07:09 PM

"I like small titties. Anything over a handful is wasted."

No, it's not. More than a handful is not necessary, but it's certainly not wasted. Be exact with these things, Acidman! I like small breasts, but I relatively recently learned that there exist in the world big, beautiful boobs. They can be aesthetically astounding, those things, and I'm glad to've had the chance to encounter them.

As for cocks, jeez dude, put on a skirt and wash the dishes, what's up with that?

Posted by: Rube on February 10, 2005 07:13 PM

I wanna know what wimmen think!!! What's wrong with that?

Posted by: Acidman on February 10, 2005 07:39 PM

Ok Rob You asked for it...

*Are some cocks prettier than others? yes

* Did you ever see one that you thought was downright UGLY? Hmmm not really...interesting yes ugly no

* What is the difference? shape, length, amount of fur

*How many of you ever saw an uncircumsized male? saw two

* What is better--- length, width or the person it's attached to? definitely the person

* Is a blow-job FUN, or do you see it as a female duty? fun sometimes better than the fuck

* You have multiple orgasms (I mean "abbadabbas") How do you do that? I don't have to build up a supply before I can go again...and the more you touch the longer and more intense the orgasm

Now more from you!

Posted by: Chelle on February 10, 2005 07:56 PM

I think most of the answers to these questions depend on who they are attached to.

I've never seen an uncircumsized male.

And when it comes to size, bigger is not necessaily better. Too big can hurt. I prefer smaller. The ole' cliche is true, "It's not the size of the tool, but how you use it."

I like doing a blowjob occasionally, but I don't like the liquid. I prefer to go down and get my man all excited, then finish off elsewhere.

And multiple orgasms are kind of interesting. Sometimes they are like separate individual orgasms......other times they are like one long orgasm with peaks and valleys. I didn't know that I could have those until I got a vibrator.....and then met my current lover.

Posted by: DogsDon'tPurr on February 10, 2005 08:42 PM

HOW old do you profess to be and still not know the answers to these questions?? Good gawd, man, if ya gotta ask, well never mind, guess we can tell ya ONE more time!

*Are some cocks prettier than others?
Hmm, the onliest ones I ever saw were white or pink or purple; they were all nice lookin

* Did you ever see one that you thought was downright UGLY?
Good lord no, honey! What's the old saying 'There's no such thing as bad sex' Same thing goes for a man's brain/strike that, I mean penis

* What is the difference?
What's the difference with what?

*How many of you ever saw an uncircumsized male?
Yep sure enuf have

* What is better--- length, width or the person it's attached to?
Well they say size doesn't matter,,,but 'they' lie!

* Is a blow-job FUN, or do you see it as a female duty?
There aint nuttin that is my DUTY; only what I want to do!

* You have multiple orgasms (I mean "abbadabbas") How do you do that?
Oh yes I do and too bad you guys can't!! That's just our little secret; if we told ya, we'd have to kill ya!

Posted by: Michele on February 10, 2005 08:50 PM

*IMHO, all cocks possess a degree of beauty, but some make you…speculate more than others. Bionic Roscoes, for instance. LMAO Sorry, couldn’t resist that. :-)

*Not really. Weird-looking (as in strangely bent), but not ugly. Just different.

*See above.

*Once.

*IMHO the answer to this question depends the woman’s time of life. 15-20 years ago I would have answered unequivocally “The person it’s attached to.” Now, however, in the rank yet wholesomely lusty cynicism of mid-life, I would have to say the answer depends upon hormone levels on any given day. In the short term, at any rate.

*Blow jobs are not fun, per se. The consistency and “mouth feel” of the…erm…discharge…leaves a lot to be desired. But the POWER of being able to give good head…to finely tune the reaction of your man so that he begs (or not) at your whim…now that’s A LOT of fun and an extraordinary aphrodisiac. Especially if he hasn’t been eating a whole bunch of asparagus or anything else funky.

*The handy-dandy clitoris. Plus exquisite muscle control. Like a warm, wet velvet vise.

Posted by: Amy on February 10, 2005 09:56 PM

Are some cocks prettier than others? Yes

* Did you ever see one that you thought was downright UGLY? No, and as a nurse, baby, I have seen LOTS of them

* What is the difference? prefer 'em cut, though since I've never fucked or sucked an uncut one, maybe I could change my mind

*How many of you ever saw an uncircumsized male? many

* What is better--- length, width or the person it's attached to? person it's attached to...to a certain degree....if it's TOO small even on a great guy....hmmmmm, not sure

* Is a blow-job FUN, or do you see it as a female duty? I like to feel and taste of a cock in my mouth, main pleasure of it is in the pleasure the man gets.....I even like swallowing....but, don't force me

* You have multiple orgasms (I mean "abbadabbas") How do you do that?
G-spot stimulation, makes me squirt if hit right, over and over and over.....

Posted by: tina on February 10, 2005 11:43 PM

Are some cocks prettier than others? eh...i'm usually more focused on the action at hand (so to speak) than the beauty of the cock

Seen an ugly one? yes i have it haunts me to this day

the difference? i have no idea but i know i didnt like how it looked
I have never seen an uncircumsized male
Its more important to me on who the cock is attached to but im young and still slightly optimistic
Blow jobs can be fun if its with the right person but if it becomes an expectation then its no longer anything im interested in. and yes i swallow but if you piss me off i will spit it back at you.
multiple abbadabbas- i have no idea how it happened to me but all i know is that i went to sleep with a smile on my face and woke up happy the following afternoon. It was great

Posted by: shelley on February 11, 2005 12:32 AM

Wow ! you've got some pretty cool female readers here ! whoda thunk it?

Posted by: Robert on February 11, 2005 12:52 AM

I wish Anna would post a comment to this one.

You KNOW whom I speak of.

Posted by: wes jackson on February 11, 2005 03:22 AM

I can only really comment on the blowjob question, being a straight male. I have had many gay friends in my life and they ALL profess to love giving them and swallowing like it was the breath of life, and they make the logical claim that who knows better where and how to stimulate a cock better than a man. I always thought that was a pretty valid point. I think I've learned a lot about getting a woman off by giving head to them over the years, but I don't own a clitoris so who knows. I just had a first wife who taught me with statements like " Not there dipshit, a little to the left."

BTW, no, I've never gotten one from a man. I don't fuck friends, male or female. However, the woman who doesn't enjoy giving me one is never in my life very long. I had one who actually came herself when giving me one and I came. You want to talk about an added punch to the orgasm, that MMMmmmMMMMM on you while you're coming. WHOA!! Unfortunately, I lost that one. Oh well, such is life.

Posted by: Drugstore Cowboy on February 11, 2005 08:26 AM

*Yes..some cocks look better than others.
*NO..never seen an downright ugly one..saw an incrediblely little one though and I don't think me laughing at it helped much.
*difference? huh?
*Never seen an unclipped one.
*Length is better..sorry little dudes but it is.
*It's not fun or a duty..it's a gift. I've been known to do it without being asked but usually I gotta be asked first..I don't volunteer for having my mouth swabbed.
*I never had the mulitple before until I met my husband..he gets all the credit.

Posted by: sandy on February 11, 2005 08:34 AM

Looks like you've elicited some great information, Rob. Now I've got a question for you or anyone else out here. The wife has pretty bue eyes. After the big O, they turn green! No shit. I've never seen this in another gal and I have had some experience in this departement in my youger days. No Rob, I wasn't as big a ho as you, but I was close!

Posted by: Ed on February 11, 2005 10:15 AM

Ed..my eyes are sky blue..no shit but aftter the BIG O..they have turned hazel...you my friend are doing something right.

Posted by: sandy on February 11, 2005 11:25 AM

*Are some cocks prettier than others? Oh yes

* Did you ever see one that you thought was downright UGLY?
Yes. Guy was very nice looking... Tall, in great shape, very attractive. The dude should have kept his clothes on... When undressed, I discovered he was, what I affectionately call now, "Gorilla Salad"... Absolutely the hairiest person I've ever seen, think black lab with a mans head on it... His erection, in contrast was the size of my middle finger, and VERY pale. Among all the hair, it was the sickliest thing I'd ever encountered. We did not have sex.

* What is the difference?
It has to at least look alive...

*How many of you ever saw an uncircumsized male?
Count me in.

* What is better--- length, width or the person it's attached to?
Until I had the Gorilla experience, I would have said person. Now, at age 36 and 4 years plus away from that adventure, I'm much more interested in fucking the dick... It MUST be up to standards or I don't even get to the point of considering the person... Maybe it's those hormones... :) Anyway, I much prefer midlength (an honest 6" is FINE!), and a little "girthy". I like the ones that either have the bigger head, narrower bottom, or the ones that are a little wider at the base. Oh, and while we're on the subject, boys, gotta tell ya, shave and trim down there... Makes it MUCH better. Ditto for wimmen.

* Is a blow-job FUN, or do you see it as a female duty?
Depends on the guy, but usually fun (99.9%). Although, I must admit, I do not enjoy giving head to an uncircumsized. The extra skin just doesn't do it for me. Also, do not touch my head... If you have the urge to grab my head and move it, don't forget where my teeth are.

* You have multiple orgasms (I mean "abbadabbas") How do you do that?
Kegels! For the max kegels you can get a vaginal egg (a weighted sealed ball or egg shape) and put it up in the vaginal canal and do your kegels with it in place. I also like a penis that pumps during ejaculation... Almost guaranteed to put me over the edge. The most and best orgasms I ever had was with a midlength (6"), girth of about 6" on the bottom, with a slightly larger head and upper shaft of maybe 1/2" more. And, he had a libido that was amazing... Back to the story: In one afternoon, we sucked and ****** the afternoon away, he came 4x, and I was at at least 10 or so. Was also the only time I ever experienced a female ejaculation. I was so worn out, I slept, after he left, for over 10 hours.

Oh and did I mention that wimmen should do their kegels while having sex... Especially as the man climaxes. Sends 'em thru the roof.

It's a bit warm in here... Later...

Posted by: wlspov on February 11, 2005 02:17 PM
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