Gut Rumbles

October 21, 2007


Originally published October 20, 2003

I have a box of pictures that the BC finally gave me almost two years after our divorce. She carefully culled every picture of HERSELF out of there, which leaves me something that resembles her memory of our marriage.

It never happened.

I remember when we bought our first house and paid ourselves out of incredible debt one month at a time. I remember painting white the "Bat Cave," which was the paneled den, with two coats of Kilz and two coats of white paint. We ripped up that nasty carpet and laid down tile all the way to the kitchen. We both had turf burns on our knees after that. We drank a bottle of wine and made love on a blanket on the kitchen floor when we were finished.

She doesn't remember that. It never happened.

She wanted a baby. We started working on that project. I rented a room at the Hyatt Hotel on River Street so that we could eat, drink and be merry at the Seafood Festival without worrying about driving home afterward. She started her period that day and cried on the balcony of our hotel room as if somebody was dead. I told her that we would get it right sooner or later. I enjoyed the practice. We got it right one month later.

She doesn't remember that. It never happened.

When she was pregnant with Quinton, I made moo-cow noises at her a few times when her belly was huge. She remembers THAT. I was such an asshole. But she doesn't recall the nights I slept with my head on her belly and talked to my son while he kicked me in the face from inside of her. She doesn't remember the songs I sang to him before he was born. She doesn't remember that 4:00 AM to 8:30 PM day when Quinton was born and I was with her the entire time, THEN went out to buy her a 12-piece fish dinner from Captain D's because she didn't like hospital food.

That never happened.

She never fucked around on me, moved an unemployed dope-smoker into my house and behaved like a bloodless cunt, either.

That never happened.

A whole lot of my life never happened. I've got pictures to prove it.

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