Gut Rumbles

April 07, 2007


Originally published April 25, 2004

I absolutely LOVE the vivid images that Southerners throw into their speech. You can sample a few good ones here, but I know a lot more of them.

*He's as lazy as a cut dog.

*He was as happy as a dead pig in sunshine.

*That woman could suck a golf ball through 30' of garden hose. Take the chrome right off a trailer hitch, too.

*That shit was hard as Chinese arithmetic.

*He was as happy as a dog with two dicks.

*If brains were gunpowder, he couldn't blow his nose.

Too few people in this country understand the meaning of "y'all," "yonder" and "directly," too.

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