Gut Rumbles

May 16, 2006

i blew 'em off

At 5:00 this morning, I called the doctor's answering service and left a message saying that I wasn't gonna make my 9:00 physical therapy session. I said that I hurt too badly to be there.

At 9:15 this morning, a nurse or a receptionist or somebody from the doctor's office called ME, and in a very surly tone of voice said that if I DID NOT take the physical therapy, my shoulders would NEVER get better.

I told her, "Okay, darlin.' I'll make a deal with you. If you send a driver over to my house to pick me up and deliver me to the clinic, I'll ride with him. I'll physical therapy my Cracker ass off, too. But right now, I hurt so badly that I don't think I can drive a car by myself. I've had very little sleep, I am in terrible pain, and I think I'm cramping in both shoulders from the shots I got yesterday. If you WON'T come and get me, I ain't gonna make it on my own."

Man, but I got a LOAD of sympathy from HER. "Huh! Do you think you can make a session on Thursday? Is 9:00 AM good for you?"

Shit. I started to say, "A bullet in my brain would be 'good for me' right now, but I hurt too badly to pull the trigger myself. Do YOU wanna come over here and shoot me? You'd do it for a horse in the same condition."

But I didn't say that. I said that I would be there on Thursday. And I WILL, if I can. But I think I need a shit-load of ibuprophen or something similar right now. And THAT'S a laugh, because I can't drive to the store any better than I could to the doctor's office this morning. I can barely MOVE today. Man, please!

I quit drinking for THIS???


I'd be happy to drive you to your appointment if only I get to come in and watch them wring out your shoulders like a dirty washcloth. Largekin

Posted by: Largekin on May 16, 2006 11:48 AM

The first 24-48 hours are guaranteed HELL. The third day is purgatory. Hopefully by the weekend you'll feel a big improvement, and even if you don't I doubt you'll tell the doc for fear of getting another round of shots...

Posted by: epador on May 16, 2006 12:08 PM

If you hadn't quit drinking, it's true you'd not be going through this.

You'd be dead.

Now, pleasantries aside, when I went because my shoulder was messed up, they put moist heat on it and used ultrasound to relax the muscles. Physical therapy isn't all pain these days. :)

Posted by: Cythen on May 16, 2006 01:08 PM

Ya pussy!

Posted by: livey on May 16, 2006 05:45 PM

Acidman, why don't you ask your doctor about PT at home? Home health agencies can do that and if you're in too much pain to get out and about it's worth a shot. Worst that can happen is he can say "no". But I bet he'll make the referral if for no other reason than to shut you up :)

Posted by: BabsRN on May 16, 2006 09:28 PM
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