Gut Rumbles

January 01, 2006

it'll work

A Crossman pellet rifle is a handy thing to have. If I owned one, it probably would be a Pumpmaster Model 760 with a cheap Wal-Mart scope on it. I've often thought about buying one of those just to knock squirrels out of my bird feeders and discourage cats from raiding mockingbird nests in my back yard.

I've heard that if you pump one of those rifles 10 times, the .177 pellet will kill a squirrel, and if you pump it five times, it will sting the hell out of a cat's ass and make the cat fall out of a tree. Not that I actually would shoot a cute, fuzzy-tailed pillaging rat squirrel or a sweet, darling asswipe bird-molester cat, even if I DID own a Crossman .177 pellet rifle with a cheap Wal-Mart scope on it.

Those guns can be dangerous, and I don't want no kinda dangerous shit around my Crackerbox.


You'll shoot yer eye out!

Posted by: Donger on January 1, 2006 08:47 PM

I dunno about cats, but I shot a raccoon right in his asshole a couple years ago with my Crossman as he was digging in the backyard trash. Ain't had a problem with raccoons since - I guess the little fuckers can communicate.

Posted by: Donnie on January 1, 2006 08:57 PM

I think momma ran with the scissors for the last time.

Posted by: Richthofen on January 1, 2006 10:00 PM

I have a hard time believing a pellet at 20 feet can penetrate the chest wall of a human being. You do have to wonder if this isn't an example of opportunistic reporting. I'd like to see the final report, but I have the feeling we won't see the press cover any correction.

Posted by: Tom on January 1, 2006 11:45 PM

Tom, check out the Mythbusters episode Exploding Jawbreaker sometime. While testing whether a thrown playing card could be lethal (they build a throwing machine that spits playing cards out at over 100 feet per second) they fire a pellet gun at a block of ballistic gelatin. IIRC, the pellet penetrated six inches (the machine-fired playing card manage half an inch). From this, assuming it didn't hit a rib, a .177 pellet could reach the back wall of the chest cavity (lungs being significantly less dense than gelatin).

Posted by: Scott Crawford on January 2, 2006 12:02 AM

Rob, IF you did have that pellet gun, you just might make another run to Walmart and pick up one of the DAISY Electronic Point Sights. Only about $8 but really neat once you learn how to set it up

Posted by: AndyJ on January 2, 2006 07:34 AM

The only one I feel sorry for truly in that story is the boy. He didn't know it would kill her; I hope he doesn't carry the guilt around with him for a long time. He did the right thing, defended the people who were caring for him and who loved him. Bottom Line: one less person tax dollars have to go towards looking after in prison.

Posted by: Lisa on January 2, 2006 08:58 AM

This happened where I lived. They did update the story to say she died as the result of a "pellet wound". Actually, where the events took place I was more supprised the 14 year old didn't have a pistol. It's one of the worse areas of town. Still it is tragic, but at least we won't be dealing with the mother any longer spending money trying to rehabilitate her.
Makes me think back when I was younger and we used to have BB gun fights with those (no more then 2 pumps).

Posted by: TC on January 2, 2006 09:36 AM

THIS will take care of all your nefarious needs.......I got mine

Posted by: Billy Budd on January 2, 2006 04:50 PM
Post a comment

*Note: If you are commenting on an older entry, your
comment will not appear until it has been approved.
Do not resubmit it.