Gut Rumbles

August 04, 2005

words of wisdom

I must be a really shitty father. I've allowed my son to play with dangerous toys, I bought him a BB gun and I've let him use matches to build a fire. It's a pure wonder that he ain't dead yet.

Allowing your son to use a chain saw at nine years old is beyond stupid.

Maybe you can teach him to light fireworks on the fourth of july????

How about teaching him about nature? Let him poke a rattlesnake so he learns not to mess with it.

Teach him about bees. Have him stick his hand in a hive.

Alcohol? Teach him what it's like to get drunk and throw up when he's 10 years old....That way he'll be able to handle his liquor.....

You have so many life lessons left to teach your young son...

Posted by dorothy at August 4, 2005 01:58 AM

Dorothy, you need to get laid, and I pity any pussy-whipped son YOU ever raise. Quinton KNOWS how to light fireworks. He's been doing that since he was seven years old and he hasn't blown himself up yet. He also knows how to build a fire, and I sometimes let him do that all by himself.

I always supervise, but I let him do the work.

As far as "nature" goes, Quinton learned a lot about goats, chickens, snakes and bees when we lived on the mini-farm. I'll bet he could teach YOU a thing or two. Quinton knows the difference between a "bad" snake and a "good" snake just by looking at the snake's head, because I TAUGHT HIM THAT! (I also told him that there's really no such thing as a good snake. Don't EVER bring one home.)

This comment just reinforces my belief that we're raising a generation of pussy-men today, thanks to the input of "liberated" wimmen.


I hope she never has a son. I played with bottle rockets and such for years, a lot of it unsupervised, and never got burned. Why? My dad taught me how not to. They supervised, gave me a start -- like teaching me to ride a bike -- and let me go from there. Dorothy strikes me as the type to ban a kid from his bike if he skins his knee once. The type who'd get hysterical and yell at other kids parents for it.

As for the ridiculous suggestion of bees, I got stung by two wasps at the age of three -- I figured that out all on my own.

Posted by: Adam Lawson on August 4, 2005 11:33 AM

I bet she's in favor of teachers using purple pens instead of red pens because red is hostile and makes kids "feel bad".

*sticks finger down throat*

Posted by: blondage on August 4, 2005 11:36 AM

Bet dorothy lives urban too. Growing up with a lot of my time spent outdoors and non-urban, I learned about bees by age 3, knew guns were not toys by 4, learned how to shoot by age 7, played with matches from about 7 on (and never caused any damage with them), knew how to build a fire by 7 (and how to build one that would light in about any weather when camping by 9), rode in the back of pickups without restraint from about 5 on, learned how to drive one by 9, knew about good and bad snakes by 6, started making homemade gunpowder and such by 10, and, well, the list could go on and on. Obviously my parents were stupid and should have been locked up for felony child abuse and I should be dead or maimed. Then again, the docs said I should never have made 18, but my parents raised me to live and to be able to live no matter what... All things that give dorothy and people like her the vapors...

Posted by: Laughing Wolf on August 4, 2005 11:42 AM

Speaking of red pens, it always looked like the teacher had cut her throat when she corrected my paper (thats how much crimson ink there was)

My kids were in Cub Scouts and I bought them each a pocket knife.....and sure enough, my oldest boy at about age 8 or 9, had the thing close on his thumb and off we went to the ER (several sutures to close the nice slice he put in it) But he never did it again.....

matches? Fire? We always had summer time campfires (how else you gonna bake them potatoes?) And both my kids learned rather quickly what both lighter and matches can create (in a hurry)

The worst thing you can do is create some big sense of the forbidden when it comes to little boys and fire, knives and guns.....Best to handle these things with a hands on approach....Boys will be better off for it...

Posted by: Ruth on August 4, 2005 11:51 AM

You know, maybe I'm a screwed up parent but my boys know how to do all that stuff.

See the point she missed was supervision. Geez, no you don't let your kid run wild..but you DO teach them to survive in the real world without hurting or killing themselves. You can only do that by recognizing what the real world is.

For example:
My 18 yr old son goes to work with his dad every day. He crawls up under hot ovens and fixes them and any other nasty ass job that they tell him to do throughout the day. My husband comes home from work and cracks a beer before he takes a shower. Why is it that my 18 yr old can't? The law. Well, as his parent, I decide that when he acts and works like a man, if he wants to have a beer like a man ...go for it.

Wonder if her kids have her back like mine do?..or Rob's does? Will her kids be promising to call every chance they get...and actually do it? Somehow I don't think so.

Posted by: Kelly on August 4, 2005 11:54 AM

What doesn't kill you only makes you stronger.

Posted by: gravdigr on August 4, 2005 11:54 AM

I was hacking away at trees with my father's Stihl at roughly the same age. I wanted to help him do stuff, as all boys are oft to do at that age, so he showed me how.

For exactly the same reason, I was given keys to his weapons, allowed to do whatever I pleased (short of crossing "the line") with fireworks and explosives in general, allowed to have alcohol as I wished, and if I happened upon a rattlesnake, my father would have been cheesed right off if I didn't blow it away.

He taught his son right from wrong, how to be a man, and the consequences for fucking up. All of said lessons stuck, and they're the reason I'm not 1) Dead, 2) A pansy-assed liberal fuckup blaming other people for my mistakes in life.

Posted by: Mr. Lion on August 4, 2005 11:57 AM

While you're teaching Quinton, make sure he knows the difference between a got-dam dumb bitch and a regular woman too. I think Dorothy needs to go back to Oz and play with the fucking Wizard.

Posted by: assrot on August 4, 2005 11:59 AM

uuuh, whats so dangerous about cutting wood with a chain? I can see that it might take a while but---

Posted by: GUYK on August 4, 2005 12:08 PM

Erm... I'm confused again. Rob, when you say 'liberated' women, what do you mean by it? Only I was taught by both parents how to do things like set a fire, change a plug and use an axe to build treehouses and so when I was about 9, and I thought I was 'liberated' as I can think for myself and look after myself. Does a 'liberated woman' mean something else in the States?

Posted by: Misty on August 4, 2005 12:11 PM

Perhaps Dorothy would approve of the way a guy like Nicholas Berg was raised. His father failed him big time. The kid had no sense of situational awareness or self-preservation and that was his father's fault, not the President's as his father claims. If you don't take some lumps as a kid, you'll never know cause and effect. These are the things you learn from your father if you have one worth two shits.

Posted by: Larry Kephart on August 4, 2005 12:28 PM

Dorothy's just engaging in moral masturbation. It doesn't take much effort; it doesn't accomplish anything useful, but it makes her feel good because she believes it demonstrates her moral superiority.

Posted by: Scott Crawford on August 4, 2005 12:35 PM

Parents only have 18 years to teach their children life skills. Life skills are many of the things that you''ve mentioned teaching your son and these things aren't taught in school. Balance in all things is important. When it comes to a well rounded individual I think you can guess where my vote would be. My daughter first. Your son second. Dorothy's child is likely to be the dead weight that our kids have to drag along through life.

Posted by: Susie T on August 4, 2005 12:53 PM

I would have killed to have a dad like Rob. As a child my father wasn't allowed to spend time with me. It wasn't until I was in my 30's that I got to spend some quality time with him and he taught me how to safely use power tools. Unfortunately he died a few years later.

Dorothy if I had a dick I'd shove it down your throat to keep your stupid yap from spewing your venom.

Posted by: livey on August 4, 2005 01:10 PM

I have two grown successful sons 30 and 25. Both have worked since they were 14 and they are strong, savvy, and extremely grads, graduate school....Great kids.....Never let them use a chain saw though......

I get laid all the time, thanks for the concern.....

Letting your son use a chain saw at 9 is stupid.....

And Livey, two words for you....Anger Management.

Posted by: dorothy on August 4, 2005 01:54 PM

Must take umbrage (how u spell that??) with ALL of you.

Dorothy, get a life. Do you go through daily life afraid of a lot of things? I imagine you do.

A-man, suggesting she get laid?? What does that mean? Can't you do better than that?

"we're raising a generation of pussy-men today, thanks to the input of "liberated" wimmen"

And I consider myself a liberated woman--meaning I didn't bother to hang on to a controlling and abusive husband, I'll just take care of myself and my kids, thank you very much. But I let my boy shoot fireworks(since the age of about 10), when I'm enjoying the show. He's been given a lot of training, by me, about how NOT to be an idiot with fireworks and he's a good listener and does well. I'm teaching him how to ride a DANGEROUS motorcycle, (off road), because I do it and he might as well learn how to do it right, carefully and while he'll still listen to his old lady (he won't be riding a bike on the road until he's legal and he takes a DMV safety course).

I dare you to call my boy a "Pussy-man" to my face!! I'll take you down, A-man!

Posted by: Suz on August 4, 2005 02:06 PM

Of course you are a shitty father. And a shitty husband, shitty employee, shitty 'journalist', in fact you pretty much suck at everything.

You have displayed so much bad judgement in your life it's amazing you're still out of jail. But, there's time left and no doubt you'll find a way. While boasting about how right you are all they way to your cell. I'd love to be there the first time you drop your soap in the shower.

Oops! Ooweeee...!!!

Posted by: I'm not Beth on August 4, 2005 02:32 PM

I hope you don't have a desire, ever, to have custody of any sort, of your son. Because you've just given us a long list of reasons you should never be left alone with him. EVER.

Posted by: Child Welfare Dept. on August 4, 2005 02:35 PM

GOTDAM acidman you sure know how to reel the trolls out from under the bridge.Must be fun catching them time after time again. I guess its the way they put up a fight---

Posted by: GUYK on August 4, 2005 02:46 PM

I guess climbing trees, monkey bars, riding a bike on a street where cars traversed, jumping off a diving board or, hell, even swimming was out of the question for Mrs. D's metrosexual sons. I bet they couldn't change a lightbulb.

Good fucking Lord almighty. There is danger EVERYWHERE. Parents teach, guide, supervise, pray a lot, and then set them free.

Men are SUPPOSED to know these things, aren't they? How in the fuck are they supposed to learn then, watch a demonstration at Home Depot when they are 20? Nahh...they are "educated" and possibly "rich enough" to hire us backward, dumbass, do-it-our-selvers for them.


Posted by: Surfie on August 4, 2005 02:46 PM

Hey Dorothy twatface, that was my anger management, be happy this wasn't a couple years ago or you'd be pushing up daisies in my back yard!

Posted by: livey on August 4, 2005 03:06 PM

And another thing you need to be dragged off and shot.

Go ahead attack me bitch. I'm ready

sorry for taking your bandwidth Rob, I'm in a mood today.

Posted by: livey on August 4, 2005 03:07 PM

There is A -LOT pussy-men out there!!
4- SURE!!

But .... a lot of young men (and women) are fighting for are country too.

Posted by: Krista on August 4, 2005 03:08 PM

I always wonder what was the name of the government Nanny issuing all these dire warnings and new regulations....

Hey, Dorothy, you're iliving in the land of OZ.

Saw a comedienne do a routine last night on the Comedy Channel...among her questions:

How did we survive swing sets made with METAL POSTS set on CONCRETE?

Posted by: Maggie on August 4, 2005 04:19 PM

Mr Smith
you keep raising your boy the way you want to-screw that bitch she is a clueless moron.
i said and i meant it. j

Posted by: j on August 4, 2005 07:50 PM

I don't see what the big deal is. I was using a chainsaw at 9, as well as a riding mower (they didn't have "operator-presence" switches in those days), a bicycle, and who knows what else that might give Dorothy the vapors. Kids are over-protected nowadays. No wonder so many of them are so useless.

Misty: I think the quotes indicate that our host is referring to that particular type of "liberated" woman that sees men and women as the same and therefore refuses to acknowledge that fathers might be useful in the parenting of children. I could be wrong, just a guess.

Posted by: Jim on August 4, 2005 08:01 PM

I'm more convinced than ever that "I'm not beth" the troll beth and all the other trolls whose comments are so similiar is the BC. Who else would call you "a shitty husband?"
Nothing you have written has justified that, and believe me I am an expert on shitty husbands. Besides, it's way too coincidental that she is posting this bullshit when Quinton is calling you again.

You want me to take care of the bitch Rob, just say the word.

Posted by: livey on August 4, 2005 08:11 PM

We are a sorry group of people who have overlooked so many child abuse cases. I decided not to remove a child from his home because his father was sexually molesting him. I thought it was pretty damn funny myself. But letting your 9 year old son even WATCH a fireworks show is abuse and you should be punished. That's how we work! WE SUPPORT PEDIPHILIA, PHYSICAL AND MENTAL ABUSE ON CHILDREN!!!!!!

Posted by: Child Welfare Dept. on August 4, 2005 08:47 PM

" I decided not to remove a child from his home because his father was sexually molesting him. I thought it was pretty damn funny myself. But letting your 9 year old son even WATCH a fireworks show is abuse and you should be punished. "

Oh yeah your mentality shows there. YOU decided to let a father molest his child and YOU THOUGHT IT WAS FUNNY!

But a 9 year old WATCHING fireworks is abuse?

You are fucked up!

Posted by: livey on August 4, 2005 09:43 PM

You think Dorothy is the real BC?

Posted by: catfish on August 4, 2005 10:55 PM

It would be exactly her mentality.... (and maturity and intelligence level.)

Wouldn't expect much more than that from her.
Well... "much more worse", maybe, but nothing a bit better.

(Lord, GOD, I hope Rob got the irreplaceable stuff out of that package he's got for Quinton....)

Posted by: Stevie on August 5, 2005 03:45 AM

"Perhaps Dorothy would approve of the way a guy like Nicholas Berg was raised. His father failed him big time. The kid had no sense of situational awareness or self-preservation and that was his father's fault, not the President's as his father claims. If you don't take some lumps as a kid, you'll never know cause and effect. These are the things you learn from your father if you have one worth two shits."
-Larry Kephart

Yeah, Larry. It was all Nicholas Berg's fault that he was beheaded....and NONE of Bush's fault. What a complete fucking idiotic statement by a useless moron. Perhaps Bush 43 should have learned a few lessons from HIS father about why we didn't march into Bagdad in '91and we wouldn't be in this fucking mess today. At least his father knew to listen to all those who advised that an invasion of Iraq to overthrow Saddam would only lead to instability and chaos in the middle east and a worldwide jihad against the west. Even though his father wasn't worth "two shits", he certainly knew more than this dumbass.


Posted by: PJ on August 5, 2005 04:24 AM

"Dorothy if I had a dick I'd shove it down your throat to keep your stupid yap from spewing your venom."

Something tells me you do have one Livey nasty little she-man. And you might ought to keep your big mouth shut, cuz Dorothy would probably whoop your sorry ass ya dimwitted gash.


Posted by: PJ on August 5, 2005 04:35 AM

It's been said that I have bigger balls then most men and that seems to be true in your case.

Btw, I have 3 chainsaw, and more power tools then most mens, and I use them on a regular basis. I'm not afraid of a dimwit like Dorothy. I have the brawns to back up my mouth. Do YOU?

Posted by: livey on August 5, 2005 09:27 AM

i didn't respond to PJ 'cause s/he appears to be a troll devoid of any logic circuits but I'll try to explain my point a bit for you, Chab

The actual blame for Nick Berg's death belongs entirely with the asswipes who did the deed and if I were in charge, they would be staked out on anthills in pigskins if captured alive.

Now that that's out of the way, my point was that if Nick had had proper paternal training, he wouldn't have been running around a warzone on his own. You could tell he didn't realize he was in danger until the very end.

Fathers teach their children that the world can be a bad place and you have to be aware of danger and how to handle yourself. For example, Don't walk into a biker bar in a pink suit. It's a mental tool just like a power tool is a physical tool.

I'm not going to take up anymore of Rob's bandwidth with this. As an idiot, I've used up most of the big words I know at this point, anyway.

Posted by: Larry Kephart on August 5, 2005 02:34 PM

Can you imagine, for fuck's sake, how many people would be on this planet if EVERYBODY survived childhood? Only the stupid ones get killed. It's God's way of thinning the herd. That's why he invented power tools and Dorothies in the first place.

Posted by: DrugStore Cowboy on August 5, 2005 03:45 PM

That people even exist with the mind-set of "Child Wellfare Dept." is a scary thought indeed. Especially when one considers that they (a) have the power of the vote, and (b) can reproduce.

Posted by: RVD on August 5, 2005 04:26 PM

"I have the brawns to back up my mouth. Do YOU?"

Trust me...I never write checks my body can't cash. I have fought many a tough ole boys in my life and I'm always willing to back up ANYTHING I say. And I don't need a fucking GUN to do it. I only use guns to shove up my gaping asshole. Lets just hope one day the trigger is accidentally pulled and it blows a bullet up my anus and through my empty skull


Posted by: PJ on August 6, 2005 03:22 AM

Ok PJ I don't own a gun, nor do I ever think about using it. Cumere and I'll show you what a loud mouth woman with brawn can do to you.

With my bare hands.

Posted by: livey on August 6, 2005 12:02 PM
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