Gut Rumbles
 

June 30, 2005

we're all gonna die! again!

I've lived near the coast in Southeast Georgia for more than 40 years now. I've seen TWO actual hurricanes hit where I lived and we've had several close brushes with others. Tropical storms? No big deal, really.

But you'd better crawl under your bed and assume a fetal position RIGHT NOW, because some "expert" says that we're all gonna die.

Hurricane activity has increased and is likely to remain high for a decade or more, the head of the National Hurricane Center said Wednesday.

That's pure bullshit and I won't even grant that asshole statement with the dignity of a response. Believe it, if you want to be a complete idiot. How SERIOUS is this "problem?

Overall, hurricanes claim 20 lives and cause $5.1 billion in damage in the average year. Those figures can jump many times in the event of a major storm like Andrew or Hugo.

Dennis McCarthy, director of the office of climate, water and weather services, told the committee that in a typical year there are 1,300 tornadoes in the United States, killing 58 people and causing $1.1 billion in damage. Floods account for $5.2 billion in damage and 80 deaths, he said, while lightning adds 53 fatalities annually.

But let's worry about hurricanes. Yeah. That big storm is gonna getcha. Hell... you're more likely to fall in your own bathtub and kill yourself than to you are die in a hurricane. This asshole just wants some more money for "research."

Scare 'em, then save 'em. Pay ME, and I can do that. That's been the motto of every salesman who ever lived.


Comments

I've been reading your site the past year, and I tell you, I shake my head over "that was funny as shit" or "WTF?"
Look on a map for Birch Bay Wa. My home. We had a tsunami freak out a couple of weeks ago, and the local cops (part time) were driving up and down the bay BLARING "THIS IS NOT A TEST, I REPEAT THIS IS NOT A TEST!!'
They never said what the "test" actually was until they came back again, and started all over. After 30 minutes of these Keystone idiots, they do another driveby of "RESIDENTS OF BIRCH BAY, YOU MAY NOW RETURN YOUR HOMES"

Anyway, I enjoy your site, It's one I check all of the time, best of luck.
2far2care

Posted by: 2far2care on June 30, 2005 10:21 AM

Fuckem, you ain't going to die, until your number comes up, Cat

Posted by: catfish on June 30, 2005 10:39 AM

If you die in a hurricane, you were stupid. I used to live in Va. Bch before here. I've seen a few hurricanes. The most wicked storm I was ever in was one in Newfoundland. Found out later that they made a movie out of it. ..The Perfect Storm.

Anyway, during your run of the mill hurricane, the people who die are the ones who are out there say..surfing ...duh..or driving around or whatever. They didn't tie their stuff down right. You better believe it is human stupidity that causes any death. Ok there's the ones who don't evacuate when they should..same category.

I love hurricanes. I kind of miss them in a way.

Posted by: Kelly on June 30, 2005 11:35 AM

Living where I do in Florida I don't miss hurricanes-and last year the damn things didn't miss me! We were fortunate and had little structural damage but did lose some old trees. Some friends and neighbors were not as lucky and lost roofs off of homes and a couple lost their homes.

But, as the joke goes hurricanes and a redneck divorce have a lot in common because with both some one is going to lose a mobile home. I didn't but this redneck double wide I'm in is tied down and supposed to withstand a cat 4 blow.

Posted by: GUYK on June 30, 2005 01:32 PM

Well, here's the truth about hurricane activity: It WILL increase, and may stay at a high level of activity for about 40 years. Wanna know why?

Because the Atlantic Ocean, especially the belt between the Horn of Africa and the Carribean Sea, is in a warm cycle right now. In fact, they haven't seen temps this high since the 1930's, and warm water means more hurricanes. Kinda sucks, but that's the price you pay if you live in this area. As far as the national hurricane center can tell, this warm cycle will last anywhere from 20-40 years.

Now here's the good part. Due to all the research that was done about hurricanes and related causes thereof, most people in the know at the hurricane center give the whole global warming theory a resounding rasberry. This is a CYCLE, which means that the globe has been this frigging warm before, and it'll get this frigging warm again. I had to go to a hurricane briefing last month, and the speaker (who came from said national hurricane center) laughed at the theory of global warming. Gave me the warm fuzzies.

But, in regards to dying from a hurricane.... use your noggin, store away some water and food, maybe get yourself a gas grill to cook with, and you'll be just fine. In short, use common sense, don't be stupid, and you'll live. I consider most of the hurricane related deaths to be Nature just cleaning out the gene pool.

Posted by: Raging Dave on July 1, 2005 08:53 AM
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