Gut Rumbles
 

February 24, 2005

more blog wisdom

I don't want to hear any whines about "context" here. You wrote the words and I quoted them. That's all. Deny THAT FACT!!!! I chose judiciously to make you look as ridiculous as possible, but I did it for a perfectly noble reason. I wanted to humiliate you.

So, without further fanfare, I present some actual quotes from blogs that I read when I hear those voices in my head late at night:

This is it folks. By this time next week, I will be 30 years old
single southern guy

Fuck you, you whelp of a pup of a young'un of a sprout.

You know your career has hit rock bottom when you're publishing quotes from "Dogsnot Diaries".
dog snot diaries

I knew I was a goner when I started READING Dog Snot Diaries.

it's hard to feel confident and sexy when your lunch consisted of Twinkies.
zonker

Yeah, I know that YOU didn't eat the Twinkie, because you're all robust, well-dressed, confident and sexy. Well... Fuck YOU, too.

FUCK the pope. The old bastard forgets sometimes that he isn't God.
my daughter.

I just wish I could get that girl to open up sometimes...

I could use a drink.
queenie.

How about a couple of lines of coke, two joints, three downers, FOUR uppers, a handfull of these of these yellow pills (I don't know what those are. I think they came from a veternarian's office.) and a morphene patch? Wash THAT down with a drink. You'll like the in-laws a lot better.

As I've said before, this ain't rocket surgery
dash riprock.

Was that supposed to be funny? I hope so, because I laughed.

Iím lucky I can remember my name at the end of the day.
the red neck.

What IS your name, Alfred? And what are you doing with MY money in YOUR wallet? Hand it over, right now. (That trick can be worth more than $100 sometimes!)

See why I am such a pathetic creature--- ...a poor player who struts and frets his hour upon the stage...? I READ that crap, that's why!!!

Bejus help me.

Comments

I can tell you ain't no rocket surgeon.

Hey, 'Neck. I can't remember your name either.

Posted by: Dash on February 24, 2005 10:49 PM

Ol' senile bastards... whats in a name? ;)

Me llamo Bryan aka 'Neck. I figure 'tween the two of yall you'll figure out my pig spanish.

I laughed to when I read that damned "Rocket Surgery" shit though... Everybody knows it's Brain Science.

Posted by: RedNeck on February 24, 2005 11:28 PM
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