Gut Rumbles

December 18, 2003

going parking

I'm an old fart now and I don't hang around a lot of teenagers. I wonder where they go on dates now to see how many bases they can cover? When I was a teenager, we had drive-in movies, which was a perfect place to fog up the windows and make out on the weekends. I also knew about a couple of prime parking places behind Memorial Stadium and on the Bacon Park Archery range.

Have you ever been laid in a car?

A bed is much nicer, but there's just something raw and exciting that I remember about screwing in a car. Maybe I remember those experiences so well because sex was new and slightly dangerous at the time, or maybe I'm seeing it all through the rose-colored glasses of nostalgia. Either way, I recall some of the best sex of my life happening on the seats of a 1968 Javelin. (The seats reclined. It was nice.)

As a student of human nature, I know full well that teenagers today are doing pretty much the same thing I did when I was young. He-ing and she-ing is going to happen when you combine horny young men with curious young wimmen. I just wonder where they go to do it anymore.

I'll bet that if I were a teenager in Effingham County today, I would know LOTS of good places to park in the woods around here.


All's I can say is, my first car was a Chevy Blazer. You do know that the back seat in a Blazer folds alllll the way flat, right?

Tinted windows are a beautiful thing. So is four wheel drive - got that truck wedged so far back in the woods that it was invisible from the road...

'Course, in a pinch, I did the same thing with a Buick Regal. A horny teenaged boy and a willing girl will manage to traverse any terrain to accomplish the mission, scraped and banged oil pans be damned...

Heck, I had a friend who lost his virginity in an MG. With the top UP.

Posted by: Guy on December 18, 2003 07:45 AM

1963 Buick Wildcat. Bench front seat that sat four comfortably and a tilt steering wheel that folded completely out of the way.


Posted by: Lamont Cranston on December 18, 2003 10:54 AM

Acidman, if you want to find out the adult fun of "parking," just say so.

Posted by: Ms Anna on December 18, 2003 11:20 AM

me, I liked industrial parks, light industry. You find that most of these little places crank up the sidewalks at 6:00, and have loading docks where you can hide a fairly large car.In summer, you could even get out of the car for a while and take a breather, or make chestprints on the hood. Was that out loud?

Posted by: mark on December 18, 2003 12:17 PM

'68 Javelin, light green with a killer racing stripe down the middle was my first car. Nice to remember.

A-man, kids nowadays bring their date home, cuz most parents say, "I'd rather they were here, where I can know they're safe." I am not kidding! My next door neighbor lets her daughter's boyfriend spend the night. I think kids are missing out on a lot of fun by just shacking up first thing at their parents house. It must take a lot of the mistique and thrill out of one's teen years.

Posted by: Joan of Argghh! on December 18, 2003 12:52 PM

Pshaw, all of you.

I got most of my high school lovin' in a '79 Chevette.

Posted by: GORDON on December 18, 2003 01:52 PM

Ford Escort. '89 model, and of the blue variety.

I learned about 'creative lovin' early on, out of necessity. Normally I'd cry, "Fuck a Ford!", but that little car beats all in the Squirmy Nostalgia department.

Posted by: Jett on December 18, 2003 02:26 PM

Bah. In a car? ON a car is where it's at.

Posted by: Mr. Lion on December 18, 2003 03:29 PM

I'm in the college-age range, so I guess I sort of qualify as that group. Except that I'm utterly lacking in personal experience (combination of a few mis-guided thoughts about saving myself, and then lack of other interested parties when I changed my mind...oh well).

However, for someone who can legally drink but still hasn't had sex, I somehow always end up hanging around with a lot of really promiscuous people (and I do mean that...there is a difference between chosing to have sex with someone you're commited with, being sexually liberated, and being a slut, whether you're male or female. I have every bit of respect for the first two, and little for the third. I only know three people I classify as sluts, and one of them is male).

Anyone, one of the sluts I know has had sex in cars on numerous occasions. The first time, she was fifteen and in the back seat of a car with one guy while another was driving. Guy went down on her, she returned the favor, and later the guys pulled over and switched. Otherwise, the favored parking places seem to be public for the people I know who have done it in the car in the apartment complex parking lot during a party, in the Wal-Mart parking lot, in a resturant parking lot...if they're going for actual privacy, then there are plenty of little off in the corner roads no one goes down, and lots of country in close reach.

When I was in highschool, as far as I know, most people didn't bother with the car thing. Either their parents let them do it in the house, or their parents were seriously oblivious and didn't notice, or they took advantage of friend's houses which were one or the other (I know seven or eight people who had sex the first time during high school at a friend's house, using said friend's best. In four cases, they didn't have the permission of the soon-to-be ex-friend). Otherwise, there is a park across the street from the high school. Nice and wooded. Most people snuck in there at whatever time, to one area that the police patroling through usually neglected to check. Even driving by, you can see rubbers everywhere.

At least some of them were using protection, though.

Posted by: Veryalda Relisys on December 18, 2003 06:55 PM

1976 Fiat 850 convertible. With the top up! And no reclining seats either!

Posted by: Nate on December 18, 2003 08:26 PM

And questioned one night by the police while dating my current spousal unit. Backed into a dead end road, spent a long while in the back of a Pacer station wagon while the snow fell heavily and silently.

When I reached up to the dash to turn on the dome light, there appeared this hazy pink light trying to cut through the snow on the windshield.

No ticket, we were both over 21 but she was mortified to know here name was being broadcast over the airwaves while the kind officer ran a check on us!

Posted by: Nate on December 18, 2003 08:32 PM

'62 Chevy Bel-Air. Front seat.

Posted by: yak on December 18, 2003 11:07 PM

Effingham County? That's a euphemism, right?

Posted by: triticale on December 19, 2003 07:46 AM

Hundreds of dirt country roads where i grew up. Watching the corn grow or watching submarine races were euphemisms. My H S sweetheart and i usually parked across a field from her house. In my '47 Plymouth. (WIDE bench seat)

Drive-in movies were called passion pits.

Great memories! Thanks, A-Man.

Posted by: Larry on December 19, 2003 09:39 AM

Dirt roads and woods where I grew up. I had an ace in the hole: our family had a camp and I had a key. 20 beds and two couches, I used them all before I tried a car. My second car was a full size Dodge (blazer like) truck. My third was a foreign car with a hatchback, and seats that folded completely out of the way.

The most fun was with a city girl who was visiting her grandparents. The camp was too dirty, the woods too dark. Ended up behind the high school in a lit parking lot. I spent half the time looking for headlights. Course, when your mind is not on the task at hand you have the endurance of a marathoner.

Posted by: CMNF on December 19, 2003 11:59 AM

Actually, we still have an operating drive in where i live. Since i remember all the fun I had there, my daughter will NOT be allowed within 2 miles of the place!

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Posted by: autodirektversicherung on January 1, 2004 11:07 AM

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Posted by: Sanford Daria on January 19, 2004 07:06 PM

Of all the words of mice and men, the saddest are `It might have been.

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To be a human without passion is to be dead.

Posted by: Young Juliet on May 2, 2004 11:35 AM

Underestimation is a two-way street.

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