December 31, 2003
I'll probably spend tonight in jail.
I got the tickets and the reservations for the trip to Jamaica, then drove over to South Carolina and bought $100 worth of fireworks. I purchased voo-doo balls, sparklers and firecrackers, but the guy behind the counter tempted me with something I had never seen before. I bought a box of "TNT, 24-Shot, 1" Special Cannister Shells" that look pretty damn good.
As near as I can tell, you light the fuse on one of these little babies, drop it down the firing tube and get out of the way. Then, it flies up in the air like a rocket and produces THREE EXPLOSIONS, complete with SHOOTING, FLAMING BALLS! BWHAHAHAHAHA!!! I can't wait to set one of those off tonight.
The police officer down the road told me to keep everything under control and not to show my ass tonight. I may not be able to comply with his request.
I like triple-explosions with shooting, flaming balls. I just look at those words and think about good sex.
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