Gut Rumbles
 

December 31, 2003

Why not?

I'll probably spend tonight in jail.

I got the tickets and the reservations for the trip to Jamaica, then drove over to South Carolina and bought $100 worth of fireworks. I purchased voo-doo balls, sparklers and firecrackers, but the guy behind the counter tempted me with something I had never seen before. I bought a box of "TNT, 24-Shot, 1" Special Cannister Shells" that look pretty damn good.

As near as I can tell, you light the fuse on one of these little babies, drop it down the firing tube and get out of the way. Then, it flies up in the air like a rocket and produces THREE EXPLOSIONS, complete with SHOOTING, FLAMING BALLS! BWHAHAHAHAHA!!! I can't wait to set one of those off tonight.

The police officer down the road told me to keep everything under control and not to show my ass tonight. I may not be able to comply with his request.

I like triple-explosions with shooting, flaming balls. I just look at those words and think about good sex.

Comments

Sounds like a commercial, scaled down version of a real firework mortar. Be damn careful with those things, they can blow all kinds of body parts off.

Also, if you're using PVC or some other kind of plastic tube to launch them, be sure to wrap it in duct tape. Flying plastic splinters are not fun.

Posted by: Mr. Lion on December 31, 2003 12:33 PM

I think I'm gonna triple shoot MY balls tonight, too.

Posted by: Ralph Gizzip on December 31, 2003 03:04 PM

Hope none of y'all need bail money. I went and blew all my extra cash at Christmas.

Posted by: SwampWoman on December 31, 2003 03:28 PM

Have fun, Ralph Gizzip!

Posted by: Ms Anna on December 31, 2003 04:01 PM

I got my hands on some rocket balls like that a few years ago on my way through nevada.
They don't let us use anything much bigger than a sparkler out here in dry Calif.
My balls were about a 2 inch diameter. (much like my own)
THEY WERE SO BITCHEN!!!!!!!
My kids and I went nutso.

Posted by: wes jackson on December 31, 2003 05:09 PM

Hi...Im just surfed in and want to say hello!
Regards George


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Posted by: autodirektversicherung on January 18, 2004 12:54 PM

Hmmmmm interesting !!!

Posted by: dzwonki on May 26, 2004 01:11 PM
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