Gut Rumbles

April 22, 2003


I receive somewhere between 800 and 1200 visitors per day. (You can check the Site Meter-- I don't password-protect MINE the way SOME anal-retentive people do.) The numbers go up during the week, then down on the weekends, but I seem to be mired in a rut right where I am. Not much has changed during the past month or so.

I think that I need to try something different on this blog. Here's my plan:

* I am going to STOP USING FOUL LANGUAGE when I write. My mama doesn't like it, and I may put some people off with my salty vocabulary. So, I'm stopping that shit any profanity from disgracing this page ever again.

* I am going to broaden my horizons and try to become more... OPEN MINDED. Leftists MAY have a point if I stop to consider it. Michael Moore MIGHT be a really perceptive individual instead of the fat, self-aggrandizing cock-sucking bastard pumper of absolute bullshit lies that I see him to be. I need to stop and think about things before I react from my gut.

* I'm not going to drink when I write anymore. I will never again put a thief in my mouth to steal my brain. Never, ever again. I want GUT RUMBLES to be a serious, sober forum of intellectual give-and-take. I can't run that kind of site when I'm shitfaced drinking.

* I'm going to add some lefty bloggers to the roll and read them every day. I may shoot one or two of the fuckers learn something. I mean, Eric Alterman and Molly Ivans can't be completely full of shit wrong ALL THE TIME, can they?

I'm going to try that. I want to boost my traffic.


well, you MIGHT just gain a few new readers (if you could stick to that shit, which I SERIOUSLY doubt!) but then you'de be a boring fucker!

Posted by: Jim S on April 22, 2003 08:57 AM

You're gonna give me fucking nightmares.

Posted by: Angie on April 22, 2003 09:00 AM

Hmmpf! Showoff.
::creeping back to my lowly blog::

Posted by: Kate on April 22, 2003 09:18 AM

I think you'd LOSE more than you'd gain with this approach. I'll send you a bottle if it gets to bad.

Posted by: Geoffrey on April 22, 2003 09:40 AM

Hey Rob:

You sneak. You're taking today off because it is Earth Day! You're betting that the half-wits at the plant will screw something up with you not watching them and let loose a stinkload of chemicals in a giant toxic accident AND IT WON'T BE YOUR FAULT. Maybe it'll turn the Savannah River green!


Posted by: Dan Dickinson on April 22, 2003 10:14 AM

You're gonna do WHAT?!?!

That's it. I'm fuckin' outa here!

Posted by: Ralph Gizzip on April 22, 2003 11:25 AM

You want to be nicer to idiots so that more of them will read your blog? Trying to become CNN or something? ;)

Posted by: Mr. Lion on April 22, 2003 11:51 AM

April 1st was 21 days ago.

Cut the shit, Rob. You could NEVER do this. Not even for a day.

Posted by: Da Goddess on April 22, 2003 02:18 PM

shoot, Acidman, I doubt I even get 800 visitors a YEAR! Quit yer beefin!

Posted by: dragonfly jenny on April 22, 2003 02:45 PM
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