Gut Rumbles

September 21, 2009

My good deed rewarded

Originally published August 17, 2004

I had some shopping to do today and I ended up at the Winn-Dixie Customer Service Desk to buy a book of stamps. I was in line behind a very attractive young woman with a pair of the prettiest red-toenailed feet I've seen in a long time. She was a beauty and she was talking on a cell phone to someone while she performed whatever transaction she was there to do.

She had a daughter, about six years old, named Megan. I know this because Megan was restless waiting on her mama and mama had to bark at her a couple of times. "Megan, you settle down and behave! I'll be finished in a minute." I didn't mind the wait. I liked looking at her. That woman even had pretty ears.

She finished her business and walked away, leaving her cell phone and her keys on the Customer Service counter while she hurried off to catch her wayward child. I spoke very loudly: "Darlin,' I think you forgot something." She turned and looked back at me appearing somewhat stunned. Bejus, but she was beautiful. There I was, a scruffy, old unshaven fart who probably made her think of felony sex criminals when she saw me. I pointed at the cell phone and the keys. "These are yours, aren't they?" I asked. "I don't think you want to leave them here."

She said, "Oh, my GOD! Thank you!" and she came back to retrieve her belongings. "You are so sweet." Then, she stood tip-toe on those pretty red toenails and kissed me right on my unshaven cheek. I almost fell down. "I don't know where my brain goes sometimes," she said as she walked away. "Thank you again."

No, darlin.' Thank YOU! You made my day.

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