Gut Rumbles

January 09, 2008

Dry counties

Originally published December 3, 2003

I blame this post for making me ponder this subject.

I know a lot of places in Georgia where nobody can legally sell alcohol. In Effingham County, vendors can sell beer and wine, but no liquor. Randall's Liquor Store is conviently located right on the county line between Effingham and Chatham. The fucker has a gold mine there.

I can be at Randall's in less than five minutes from my house and I take a well-maintained dirt road to get there. No cops, no speed traps and no roadblocks to worry about on that trip. I NEVER see a Chatham County license plate in his parking lot. They are all Effingham.

In the last election, a referendum to allow selling liquor and mixed drinks in Effingham County was on the ballot. The Bible-thumpers turned out in droves to vote that idea down. The dumbasses didn't stop anybody from buying liquor-- they just voted their tax dollars to Chatham County and Randall's instead of their own coffers.

Dry counties remind me a lot of the sheer futility of the War On Drugs. Declare an alcohol-free zone and guess what happens, every time? People buy their liquor somewhere else and bring it home, or bootleggers start selling it illegally. Either way, anyone who wants a drink is going to get one.

Bootleggers don't card anybody, because they already operate illegally. Therefore, the end result of attempting to legislate human nature just to make yourself feel righteous results in making it EASIER for under-age people to get a drink. Where is the logic in that?

Bah! A lot of people don't think logically. People do stupid things all the time and believe that they are smart when they do. They are stunned when 14 year-old Johnny comes home staggering drunk in a dry county. HOW COULD THIS HAPPEN? WE LIVE IN A DRY COUNTY!

I know how it happens. I've bought liquor in a bootleg joint many times in my life.

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