Gut Rumbles

December 29, 2007

Shrimp salad

Originally published January 18, 2006

I grew tired of eating boston butt and decided I was ready for a change. I was craving a couple of shrimp salad sandwiches. Yeah. That's what I wanted. Shrimp salad sandwiches with potato chips.

I checked and discovered that I had all the ingredients except shrimp on hand, so I went to the market and purchased a pound of fresh medium shrimp. The rest was easy, although slightly time-consuming.

1) Boil the shrimp. A lot of people don't know how to do this step correctly, so I will enlighten you. Put a pot of water on the stove and season it well. (I use old savannah seafood seasoning, but Old Bay or a shot of almost everything in your spice rack will do.) Bring the water to a boil. Add the shrimp. Watch carefully. When the water starts to boil again, the shrimp are done. Remove from heat and drain.

2) Peel the shrimp. If you cooked the shrimp correctly this step isn't difficult. Grab the shrimp at both ends and straighten it out. Pull on the tail. Half the shell should come off right there. Peel the rest by going from the underbelly up.

3) Cut up the shrimp. I dice them into small chunks, but you can do whatever you like. Put 'em in a blender if you want to. Hell, you don't really have to cut up medium shrimp at all, but I do, just for the texture.

4) Dice some vegetables. I use three stalks of celery, half of a sweet onion and sometimes a small kosher pickle. I didn't have a pickle, so I went with half a bell pepper this time instead.

5) Throw all the ingredients in a bowl. Add mayonnaise. I don't measure the mayonnaise. I just keep spooning it in and stirring until the mixture "looks" right. Add some paprika and red pepper to make a nice, slightly-pink color. Cool the salad in the refrigerator for at least 30 minutes.

6) Serve on toasted bread. I put lettuce and tomato on the sandwiches I made today, but you can ride bareback and it's still good. Potato chips are nice on the side.

There's more cuttin' than cookin' to this recipe, but it's easy to do and damn nearly impossible to fuck up, unless you forget to peel the shrimp.

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