September 20, 2007

Government stupidity

Originally published April 14, 2004

When I was filling out my state income tax form, I went all the way to the bottom of the back page before I saw something incredibly stupid. The form is confusing enough ("Add boxes A-3 through 9-B and enter total here. If the total on line 10-A is less than zero, wait for the moonship to beam you up. If the total on line 10-A is more than zero, consult the workbook on page 94-C. While you are pondering the workbook, we're coming to arrest you.") But this one took the cake.

And I AM NOT making this up, as any Georgia taxpayer can testify. The Georgia form 500, page 2, has a place marked by a big, bold "X" that asks for "Taxpayer's Signature." Next to that line is a box that says "Check here if deceased."

I don't know what is unique about dead people in Georgia that the government knows and I don't, but I've never seen a dead person rise from the grave to sign his or her name and check a box on an income tax form. In fact, I've never known a dead person who didn't stay dead. WTF is that box for?

I started to sign the form and check the box. How would Atlanta react to that? Yeah, I'm dead but I signed my name and checked the stupid-box. Are you dickwits happy now? Just take my money and leave me alone.

Bejus! Whoever designed that form probably got a promotion.