Gut Rumbles

December 19, 2006

A set of balls

Originally published September 27, 2004

Down South, we respect people with a set of balls. I'm not talking about the crazy fucks who are capable of doing anything at any time--- they're just nut-cases---I mean the solid citizens who get along with their neighbors, work hard, keep their grass cut but don't take shit from anybody. I mean the guy with the shotgun who says softly, "Get off my land," and you know damn well that he means it.

Having a set of balls is a lot different from being a bully and trying to intimidate other people every day. Bill Clinton is a perfect example of the difference between sheer gall and a set of balls. Clinton had lots of gall, but no balls. That pussy wouldn't last ten seconds in a roadhouse bar-fight. Wimman loved him (another reason why wimmen shouldn't be allowed to vote) but I always knew that I had tracked better shit into my house on the bottom of my shoe than that man ever would be.

He had a stiff dick, but no balls.

Have you ever been in a situation where you KNEW you were about to get your ass whipped, but you threw the first punch anyway? I have. I always tried to use the "gimme three steps" way out, because I didn't want a fight, but sometimes you're not getting those three steps. Bad-ass wants to strut and you've got to deal with him.

I once wore glasses. I remember several times taking my glasses off, handing them to someone nearby and saying, "hold onto these for me," right before I turned around and cold-cocked some sumbitch twice my size. Hey! I worked in the bars back then. If you couldn't stand up for yourself, you were fucked.

I got my ass whipped a couple of times, but bad-ass didn't get no cherry there. I know what an ass-whipping is like from experience. I ain't afraid of it. Bad-ass also didn't want any more after the fight was over, even if he won. I always gave a good account of myself.

I'm too old to be doing that crap anymore, but I still recognize a set of balls when I see them. George Bush has balls. John Kerry doesn't. I know several WIMMEN with balls. They don't take shit and they walk tall. No compromise. Get off my land.

I appreciate a set of balls on ANYBODY, male or female.

Post a comment

*Note: If you are commenting on an older entry, your
comment will not appear until it has been approved.
Do not resubmit it.