November 18, 2006
Verily I say
Originally published November 9,2004
Wisdom from Jesusland:
*Don't name a pig you plan to eat.
*Country fences need to be horse high, pig tight, and bull strong.
*Life is not about how fast you run, or how high you climb, but how well you bounce.
*Keep skunks, lawyers and bankers at a distance.
*Life is simpler when you plow around the stumps.
*A bumble bee is faster than a John Deere tractor.
*Trouble with a milk cow is she won't stay milked.
*Don't skinny dip with snapping turtles.
*Words that soak into your ears are whispered, not yelled.
*Meanness don't happen overnight.
*To know how country folks are doing, look at their barns, not their houses.
*Never lay an angry hand on a kid or an animal, it just ain't helpful.
*Forgive your enemies. It messes with their heads.
*Don't sell your mule to buy a plow.
*Two can live as cheap as one if one don't eat.
*Don't corner something meaner than you are.
*It don't take a very big person to carry a grudge.
*Don't go huntin' with a fellow named Chug-A-Lug.
*You can't unsay a cruel thing.
*Every path has some puddles.
When you wallow with pigs, expect to get dirty.
*The best sermons are lived, not preached.
*Most of the stuff people worry about never happens.
Yeah. We sure are ignorant in Jesusland.
All content © Rob Smith