Gut Rumbles

June 10, 2006

a good whippin'

Did you ever have to go pick a switch off a willow tree and bring it back to your mama, your grandmother or your aunt, so that she could grab you by one arm and make you dance a circular jig while she laid welts all over you? Did you scream like a girl while that switch was tattooing your ass?

You never did that? Good. Neither did I. But I'll bet it hurt, even though that NEVER happened to ME.

I'll also bet that you never fucked up like THAT again, either, did ya? Once burnt, twice learnt.

I was an abused child.


We had a "horrible" childhood, din't we?
Thought you wuz goin to BED.

Posted by: LilToni on June 10, 2006 01:50 AM

No willows hereabouts, so a peach tree had to suffice. Also, if you got a switch that was too wimpy, you had to go get another, and that added to the total licks you had coming.

Yep, horrible abuse!

Posted by: El Capitan on June 10, 2006 02:06 AM


Posted by: Pert Moody Newt on June 10, 2006 03:03 AM

My momma just bit me. Never did that what I was doing again.
Naw It actually happened to my cousin.

Posted by: KeesKennis on June 10, 2006 03:58 AM

Sweetgum bush, hurt like shit.

Posted by: Catfish on June 10, 2006 07:09 AM

wudn't no freakin trees around my house but there was this gotdam razor strop that got just about wore out by the time I was 10. And it wasn't from stroppin a razor

Posted by: GUYK on June 10, 2006 07:17 AM

California Mulberry trees. Switches that could double as buggy whips. Forget to come home in time for dinner because you're knee-deep in the sand pile with your buddies and your Tonka trucks and you could see Mom coming from over the horizon. Leaves would be flying as she trimmed them with her dull steak knife, reserved especially for that purpose. Then you got to do the idjit jig all the way home. Hope she got dizzy! Remember this? "Move your hands!!"

Posted by: Keith on June 10, 2006 07:48 AM

You mean a switching was abuse? My sweet MaMa told me she did that because she loved me. Somebody's lyin' here.

Posted by: Tessa on June 10, 2006 07:52 AM

.. "hickory tea".... been served it a few times, and can't say I enjoyed it...

Posted by: Eric on June 10, 2006 08:06 AM

freaky that you mentioned that. When I was about 10 or so I told my mom one morning that my brother and I were gonna hike to the Indian mound that we could see from our house. She said be home by dinner. Well, that damned Indian mound was a lot farther away than we thought and by the time we got back to our neighborhood that evening, the place was crawling with cops. We tried to hide in a ditch but still got caught. When the cop brought us home, both of my parents were standing in the driveway with more cops waiting. My mom made us go out back to the willow and pick switches, with which she humiliated both of us in front of all those cops. I never went to the indian mound again.

Posted by: marcl on June 10, 2006 08:15 AM

My mother would never have settled for a willow tree. They break too easily. She was more a fan of the crab apple trees in our back yard.

And yeah...I was a slow learner, and got it MANY times more than just once, with whatever she could get to hand: switch, belt, spatula, wooden spoon, or just the flat of her hand.

If we were really bad, she's slap us right across the face. She once left a purple handprint on my cheek. I think she felt kind of bad about that.

The last time she tried to spank me, I was 23, and told her she had to cut that shit out.

Posted by: trouble on June 10, 2006 08:34 AM

Papaw and Mamaw had a huge weeping willow in their front yard.

I've been there, I've done that.

Posted by: LL on June 10, 2006 08:46 AM

My dad used to work for an auto garage in the service department and he came across many items in trade-ins that he'd bring home. Two particularly troublesome items were one wooden and one plastic racquetball paddle. They tormented my twin brothers and me for years!

Posted by: the other Steph on June 10, 2006 08:52 AM

Mine was a wooden spaghetti spoon. It was used often enough that the sucker broke mid whoopin. You know, once it broke, I never did get another whoopin. Had I know that I would have broken that spoon alot sooner.

Posted by: Dawn on June 10, 2006 08:59 AM

My mother wasn't about to waste any time cutting switches. She went straight for the wooden spoon, which she regularly broke over our butts. She kept a big supply so that was no impediment to a whupping.

Somehow I managed to raise my own daughter without using a switch. I probably spanked her of all four times in her whole life and that was just when she was tiny and did something dangerous. She grew up to be a fine woman with great manners and a respect for others. I couldn't be more proud of her.

Personally I think the spare the rod, spoil the child thing is way overrated. But I only had the one. Maybe I just lucked out with a perfect kid.

Posted by: Libby on June 10, 2006 10:18 AM

Been there, done that! Did the same with my boy, and he turned out just fine. I couldn't ask for better. But he and his wife, who I love dearly, are idiots. They have four, and just flat don't believe in discipline in any way, shape or form. So I've got four hellion grandkids. Can't stand to be with them for more than a day, or two, at a time. They haven't done those kids a favor. They haven't done the kids teachers (current and future) any favors, and they sure have made their own lives miserable. Spare the rod and spoil the child, YOU BETCHA!

Posted by: Marine6 on June 10, 2006 12:35 PM

For the record, I don't hold any grudges against my mom, and I spank my kids, too. WHich is why they both get good grades and are fit company to spend time with, well-mannered kids that I can take any place, even a fancy restaurant, and know they're going to act spite of the fact that I'm a single mom.

Posted by: trouble on June 10, 2006 01:47 PM

No switches at my house, but I was about ten years old before I found out that a fly-swatter was for killing flies.

My mom & dad raised seven of us and we all seem to have turned out okay.

Posted by: Roy on June 10, 2006 02:07 PM

Ha Roy! Same for me, except I was much older when I knew those wooden paddles came with a red rubber ball and an elastic string.
Spankings aren't abuse. I deserved all I got too.

Posted by: Independence Day on June 10, 2006 02:27 PM

Dad had a strap he'd cut from an old combine drive belt - about thirty by six inches. Hell, all he had to do was threaten to use it - I don't even remember getting whacked with it. However, fly swatters, wooden spoons and other odds and ends were used.

Posted by: Jeffro on June 10, 2006 04:17 PM

My dad just used a thin leather belt. It is light, portable, and left big old welps to remind you of your misbehavin's.

Posted by: Steph on June 10, 2006 06:23 PM

I don't mean you shouldn't discipline them Marine6. I agree that the trouble with the world today is that too many parents don't discipline their kids. They don't give them any limits because they want to be their friends instead of their parents. Heck they don't teach them simple manners. I don't think they're doing their kids any favors.

In our little world, taking away the Game Boy for a week hurt more than a whipping, that's all. In the end it's about the effect you want the discipline to have, no? It worked for me.

Like I said, I was lucky and the person I admire most in this world is my own daughter. I'm glad I didn't have to whip her to make her into the woman she is today.

Posted by: Libby on June 10, 2006 06:57 PM

During the summer, My mother and Aunt kept law and order with a freshly cut willow switch.
They would have no problem giving free willow switch dance lessons on the back porch. Something, I don't remember signing up for. "But I did learn the dance pretty quick".

Posted by: Bill on August 14, 2006 12:19 PM
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