Gut Rumbles

June 08, 2006

i'm NOT insensitive

I have spent most of today deleting and blacklisting spam-slammers from my site. Yeah, I've had another attack, but I'm accustomed to that shit by now. I don't like it, but... sometimes... if you can turn off that decency-control in your mind, you can enjoy them.

Here are some of the really GOOD ones--- the kinda thing I want to spend MY whole day sending out, just to make my mama proud of me:

* "Barnyard sex," complete with 50 links.

* "Teenage sex," complete with 100 links.

* "Black lesbian sex," with a mere 25 links. WTF??? Black, teenage lesbian wimmen don't have sex with barnyard animals??? Bejus! My spammer is RACIST!!!

* "Viagra. Cialis." If you're an old fart like ME, and you ever hook up with a teenaged black woman who wants sex with barnyard animals, you're gonna NEED some of that shit to make you competitive.

* "Texas hold-em, on-line blackjack and ALWAYS WIN slots." Why not??? How the hell else are you gonna get the money to pay for black, lesbian teenagers fucking barnyard animals while dealing cards at the same time?

* "Little boys and golden showers." Oh, Bejus!!! How got-dam sick can you get? I think that THAT deviant spammer was sent to me by a Master's Degree holder, a real stable person, named "Beth."

* "Discount cathouse visits!!!" Save money NOW... by pre-ordering your black, lesbian whore and a barnyard animal, complete with a pissin' little boy... and GET TWO FOR THE PRICE OF ONE!!!

* "Bibles. The Complete King James version, signed by King James himself." I bought two. It WAS 6/6/6 when I did it.

* "College Degrees While-U-Wait!!!" Hmmm... I may have to go back to work, sooner or later. I bought SIX of those, at $49.99 apiece. I now have diplomas in Sociology, African-American Studies, Teacher's Education, Disgruntled Lesbian Studies, Economics, and Basket-Weaving for Quadraplegics. Put those with my legitimate English Lit degree, and I'm bound to go far in this world.

* "Wimmen fucking dogs!!! Dogs fucking college professors!!! Dogs fucking other dogs who have fucked wimmen AND college professsors!!! Order NOW and get a college degree FREE!!" I ordered two dogs... but I asked for only ONE college degree.

Okay... I'm being a real smartass here.

But did YOU ever notice... what those spammers offer isn't much different from the same idiotic shit that leftist politicians say every day? Vote for GORE--- or Hillary--- get a FREE black woman, a REAL lesbian, pissin' on a little white boy in front of a bunch of barnyard animals, PLUS insurance against Global Warming!!! Get some FREE MONEY, too!!!

Read the news, and what I just wrote doesn't sound totally ridiculous.


STOP....I'm laughing too could take that routine on the stand-up comedy...that was good.

Posted by: Sandy on June 8, 2006 11:40 PM

damn you rob.... i just snorted tea all over the fucking keyboard after the 2nd to last paragraph.

that was hillarious

Posted by: Heath on June 8, 2006 11:46 PM

Watch Dave Chappelle's Real Internet World.

Debt Consolidation!


Posted by: Bitchmama on June 9, 2006 02:10 AM

Now you can buy Hormel® SPAM® online!!!!1!!!!

(You know it's only a matter of time, don't ya?)

Posted by: McGehee on June 9, 2006 10:55 AM
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