Gut Rumbles

March 26, 2006

testicle farms

It's bad enough that the Pussification of America is turning many men into whimpering bags of confused hormones (just like wimmen, only without the tits), but I never fully despaired over this process. It works only on the Barry Manilow or Alan Alda "sensitive" types of men--- guys who know the difference between mauve and puce--- and NOT on REAL men--- guys who think with their dicks and believe that "shit-stain" is a color.

No, I was willing to bet on the stubborn survival of Mandom, simply because man is so thoroughly disgusting to begin with. I AM a man and I know what I'm talking about here. You wimmen can smoothe off a few rough edges and force us to act civilized in public, but not even YOU, with all the pussy in the world under your control, can change a man from the pig he is into the prince you want him to be. It just ain't natural.

Besides, if feminist pressure really could change men, guys wouldn't think farts are so funny.

But I don't sell wimmen short. They are masters of plot and manipulation and I worry about their ideas for man's role in this world. Someone wise once said that the only reason wimmen need men today is because no one has yet invented a vibrator that can cut the grass. That's why this story made me feel uncomfortable in my pants. I can see a possible Brave New World here.

Men raised in captivity, on testicle farms, where wimmen harvest their jewels for stem cells.

Don't laugh--- it could happen. If wimmen claim that they're doing it "for the children," NOBODY is gonna have the nerve to complain.


Cool. I like it.

Posted by: Lisa on March 26, 2006 07:41 PM

Hahaha! "A vibrator that cuts grass"........isn't that what a riding lawn mower is??!

Posted by: DogsDontPurr on March 26, 2006 07:45 PM

He's back! Praise the Lord!!!

Posted by: Renee on March 26, 2006 08:23 PM

Durn...I've been missing out, letting the boys mow the lawn...didn't know I've been missing out!!!

Posted by: DixieDarlin' on March 26, 2006 08:46 PM

You missed part of it in your pain. 'Women have 90% of the money and all of the pussy and they still ain't satisfied'. They can have the money, we just want to share the pussy.

Posted by: scrapiron on March 26, 2006 09:13 PM

They can harvest cells from my testicles after they pry 'em from my cold, dead hands! Damn! Ain't nothin' sacred anymore?

Posted by: A Lurker on March 26, 2006 10:08 PM

OhdearGawdno.... Puh-leeze don't get my brain started on that shit....

I am sick to puking of people who use *massive string of expletives deleted* kids as an excuse for everything from special treatment to calling off of work because one of them is sick.
The stupid kid is sick so you're staying home?
To tape it to bore relatives with?

The three other people besides me who do possess the balls to bitch about "for the children" *gag* shit just ain't doing it any where near loudly nor long enough, I guess.

All I know is I don't even need to let this subject take root right now.
It'll wreck my morning.
Was gonna break out with Pink Floyd in the headphones anyway.
I let that horseshit take hold, not even Ozzy will be able to stop it, it makes me so goddamned angry.

Man, I hate that shit.

*gets up hearing the tolling bell that starts Journey to the Centre of Eternity*

Posted by: Stevie on March 27, 2006 06:47 AM

Nah, somehow I think deep down wimmin like their menfolk, even if they are occasionally, how shall I say....crude. Especially when their menfolk treat them right.

Keep your stemcells, I'll take a man, thank you!

Posted by: A Different Kim on March 27, 2006 07:56 AM

Oh hell, wimmin have always had us by the balls anyhow

Posted by: GUYK on March 27, 2006 08:05 AM

Hell, I've been harvesting cells from my testicles since puberty.

Posted by: Larry on March 27, 2006 02:30 PM

Is this the sort of thing they use for harvesting...?

Posted by: BobG on March 27, 2006 04:41 PM

I could go on for way too long on this subject. But won't.

Pussy= the most powerful weapon in the universe.

Women know it!


They have gone too far, the pendulem is begining it's swing the other direction.

Movement will be slow, but it's moving. Roe vs wade for men. It's moving.

I thank gawd that the woman I have choosen to be with is not like WAY too many others that reside in our world. I really do!

Posted by: TC on March 28, 2006 10:13 AM

Oh can anybody, I mean anybody tell me the last time, (that it mattered), a woman speaking the words "OUR KIDS"?

Such is a real clue gentelmen. In fact it may be your only clue.

Today women desire your seed and your money. Understand such!

Our laws do indeed need changing, STILL!

Posted by: TC on March 28, 2006 10:17 AM

"Today women desire your seed and your money. Understand such! "

Not all of us. Just a lot of them. Not me though. I could lose my family home because of a ball-grabbing-gold-digging-bloodless-c*nt, and believe me, I deplore those sort of 'so called' women.

Never, lump ME in the same category as them, thank you!

Posted by: Misty on March 28, 2006 05:51 PM

Giving them the vote was a huge mistake.

Posted by: GORDON on March 28, 2006 11:01 PM

Actually, if truth be told, it is a threefold prooblem. Not just giving them the vote (#1), or teaching them to drive cars (#2) but, allowing them to speak without being spoken to (#3). For the benefit of anyone who might agree with the three above listed itetms, they are in no particular order.

Posted by: AnalogMan on April 2, 2006 10:45 AM
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