Gut Rumbles

February 28, 2006


I am blogging from an undisclosed location.

I left beautiful Rincon, Georgia at 0700 yesterday morning. The temperature was 27 degrees and I had to scrape ice off the windshield of my car before I could drive. My trip was uneventful after that, except for a truly exciting ride from the airport to where I am now. I thought Jamacian cab drivers were suicidal, but I rode with one yesterday who could put a stoned Rashta-mon to shame.

I always ride in the front seat in a cab here, because I can see better that way. Yesterday, I wanted to crawl into the back seat and cover up my head. Bejus! My driver was either VERY GOOD or VERY CRAZY. He cannon-balled down the streets as if he were playing a damn video game where he got bonus points for colliding with other cars or killing pedestrians. Or scaring the shit out of his passenger.
I don't know how we made it to the hotel in one piece, but we did.

I gave him a decent tip to make up for the hole my anus gnawed in his front seat during the ride.

I'm glad I wore a long-sleeved shirt on the trip. I needed it last night. It's kinda chilly here, with a nasty wind blowing. Still, I think I can survive. If I lived through that cab ride, I can handle almost anything. I'll be here in the city today, then off to the beach tomorrow, where the weather is supposed to be a lot warmer.

I was intending to post yesterday, but I couldn't get into this got-dam iMac computer I'm using at the hotel. Of course, it might have worked better if I remembered the address of my site, which I didn't. It came to me in my sleep last night. Funny how you have to put those slashes and dots in EXACTLY the right place to make a computer do what you want it to do. Finnicky bastard.

For those of you who thought I was dead because I didn't post yesterday, I'm still alive. For those of you who are curious about where I am, take a wild guess.


Costa Rica?

Posted by: Ruth on February 28, 2006 09:06 AM

.. hot damn, man... enjoy yourself.. and don't get mugged by another mango... or coconut... whichever.. I forget...

Posted by: Eric on February 28, 2006 09:16 AM

I'm betting he's playing hide and go seek in Velociman's basement, again.

Posted by: phin on February 28, 2006 09:20 AM

Falklands Islands, without doubt.
No monkeys or coconuts, but he will have to be extremely wary of the feral sheep.
They don't get much lovin'.

Posted by: Henry Blowfly on February 28, 2006 09:37 AM

Hmmm, let's hazard a guess, it sure is difficult to figure this one out! Just have fun!

Posted by: Michele on February 28, 2006 09:46 AM

Remember that weed is a gateway drug. I don't know what to, but hey. Have a good time!

Posted by: og on February 28, 2006 09:50 AM

Well I am glad your safe, was a little worried, (and BORED) yesterday....I am guessing Costa Rica, Puerto Rico, or Mexico City. I know you like it warm, and I know you probably didn't go to the middle east...

Have fun and stay sober, and if ya can, get a hooker!

Posted by: Steph on February 28, 2006 09:58 AM

"I gave him a decent tip to make up for the hole my anus gnawed in his front seat during the ride."


Posted by: asm on February 28, 2006 10:10 AM

Chicago! Hahaha

Posted by: livey on February 28, 2006 10:11 AM


Posted by: BlogDog on February 28, 2006 10:17 AM

Not even curious, Mofo. Whaddya think of that?

Enjoy your vacation. Getcha some!

Posted by: PawPaw on February 28, 2006 10:32 AM

You went to go see Livey .........

Posted by: Maeve on February 28, 2006 10:34 AM

...cold AND warm? WITH beach? lessee.........gotdamn if I know!

Posted by: TY COBB on February 28, 2006 10:38 AM

I am impressed that your bunghole can chew. Who cares where you are, we could make some real money with a talent like that. Can it blows smoke rings too?

Posted by: Florida Bill on February 28, 2006 11:00 AM

Well, you did say windy, and cold, and Lake Michigan DOES have a beach....yep, I'm with Livey!

Posted by: Raging Mom on February 28, 2006 11:28 AM

Gotta be Costa Rica. San Josť is my guess, at least for the moment. That's the city, and the beaches are a lot warmer, and a relatively short trip.

I've had those Scary Cab Rides myself. You know it's rough when your ass pulls all of the stuffing out of your seat because of the Extreme Clenching.

Posted by: Elisson on February 28, 2006 12:15 PM

Undisclosed location, eh? Beware. I hear Cheney visits alot.

And it's your own damn fault for getting a mac. Wait... can we call you Mac-Daddy now?

Posted by: Cythen on February 28, 2006 01:10 PM

You better have a damn camera you crazy bastard.

Posted by: robert on February 28, 2006 01:11 PM

I'm guessing the Britannia in San Jose. And I just checked the map. If you're taking the puddlejumper to Quepos to get to the Pacific, I would strongly suggest you take a day or two to check out the Manuel Antonio preserve. They have a lot of good cheap hotels in the immediate area and a large ex-pat population. You'll make friends at those little beach shack restaurants along the public beach. But whatever you end up doing, have a great time.

Posted by: Libby on February 28, 2006 01:53 PM

Atlantic City, New Jersey? It is, however, a tad chilly on the beach today. I know you're just dying to see if New Jersey is as wonderful as I say it is.

Posted by: Jim -PRS on February 28, 2006 02:20 PM

hope it warms up. Have a great trip!

Posted by: caltechgirl on February 28, 2006 03:31 PM

May you find yourself in the warm and waiting arms of a hot 'Rican babe. All the best, nesiyah tova (good travels) and hey, howzabout a postcard? We'll (read: I'll) miss your luvin while you're gone.

Posted by: erica on February 28, 2006 05:28 PM

Have fun in C.R. babes, and listen up...
step away from the computer!

Posted by: Lil Toni on February 28, 2006 07:08 PM

Bet you're warmer than I am tonight - -30 degrees celsius with the wind chill...

Posted by: Lisa on February 28, 2006 07:24 PM


Posted by: Shawna on February 28, 2006 08:40 PM
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