Gut Rumbles

July 05, 2005

i don't believe it

I have ranted about how ridiculous I think bottled water is, but my daughter loves it. She toted a twelve-pack of that shit into my house when she arrived.

"Daddy, it tastes BETTER than tap water!" she insisted.

I decided to put her to the taste test. Sam and Stacey went to Wal-Mart and I put two glasses of water (identical glasses) in the refrigerator. One contained her bottled water and the other was straight from my tap. When they got back to the Crackerbox, I set both glasses out on the table and told Sam, "Okay--- taste 'em and pick out your bottled water."

She sipped both and said, "This one is bottled water." She was correct.

I cried foul and claimed that she had a 50-50 chance of guessing right and that the test wasn't fair. I wanted a recount on that election.

So, yesterday, I put THREE glasses of water (this time in plastic cups) in the refrigerator while the girls went off to go "geocaching," whatever the hell THAT is. When they got back to the Crackerbox, I put the three glasses on the table and chortled proudly. "One of those is bottled water and the other two came from my tap. Pick out your bottled water."

Sam sipped all three and said, "This is bottled water." She was correct again.

I almost blew a gasket and slipped a disc. I COULDN'T TELL THE DIFFERENCE!!! I blamed THAT test on blind-assed guessing, too, so I waited until they weren't looking and tried again.

This time, I put FOUR cups of water in the refrigerator, and I tasted all four first. The bottled water in ONE cup didn't taste any different from the tap water in the other three to me. I waited for the proper moment and ambushed my daughter.

"Okay, smartass with the Golden Tongue. Pick your bottled water out of THIS selection." I KNEW I had her then.

She tasted all four and said, "This is bottled water. No doubt about it." She was correct AGAIN!

I give up now. Three for three ain't just dumb luck. Stacey laughed and said, "She really CAN tell the difference, Rob."

Bejus! I may have to re-think my position on bottled water now. I'm not going to BUY any, but... possibly, some people can taste the difference. I can't.

And I STILL think that shit is over-priced.


yeah but....I have well water (really really hard water, lots of minerals, etc) and (cover your eyes ROB) hard water is not good for male cats, as it can lead to bladder stones and cystitis and worst of all, URINARY BLOCKAGE.....(potentially fatal if left untreated)

So for the sake of my cats (2 brothers) I buy bottled water for them....

And the dog also drinks bottled water for the same reason....

And the funny thing is (I buy the water in the huge containers with the spigot and store it in the refrigerator) Well, when we had some problems with our water conditoner (tap water) and it was slightly metallic smelling.....I told the husband and the boys "DRINK THE PET WATER!"....(not realizing how silly that sounded)

But when our well water conditoner system is NOT working....the water not only smells like a bag of dirty coins, it also is ORANGE.... there a difference? You bet your ass their is....

Posted by: Ruth on July 5, 2005 11:34 AM

I can definitely tell the difference between bottled and tap, but it has to be the RIGHT kind of bottled. LIke Dasani or Evian, not just Wal-mart brand "we ran this from our sink into our plastic bottles for ya."

Rob, I bet YOU can tell the difference between your favorite beer and three others. I, having no knowledge of beer and thinking it all tastes the same, could not do it.

Posted by: Renee on July 5, 2005 11:36 AM

Depends on where you live.

You may not believe it, but New York City has some of the finest tap water on the planet. Here in Atlanta (actually, May-Retta), the tap water's pretty good. But in Louisiana it mostly blows. In Houston, feh.

And in North Richland Hills, Texas, the tap water was so vile, I could barely shower in it. Smelled like bug poison. Hell, it was so skank-nasty, I hated to shit in it for fear of offending the shit.

But the idea of spending a buck (or more!) for a Bottle of Fucking Water makes no sense to me. Unless you're in Indonesia, where drinking tap water may very well kill you by making you shit yourself inside-out.

Posted by: Elisson on July 5, 2005 12:07 PM

Most definitely a difference. The well water where I live is red and cloudy without the softener. The softener takes out the red but there's still some cloudy. So its softened water for laundry (don't like orange skivees or socks); softened, Brita-filtered water for making coffee; and BOTTLED water for drinking and cooking. We go through a five-gallon bottle a week, and nothing tastes better than a cold glass of water from that bottle late at night!

But I agree, a BUCK for a 12-ounce bottle of WATER is insane!

Posted by: Jane on July 5, 2005 12:46 PM

Aye Jane! Last thing I do every night (after brushing my teeth) is to open the refrigerator and pour myself an ice cold glass of "pet water"...

Water softener systems (for well water) can only do so much (as far as palatability goes) So me and the pets get bottled water....

Posted by: Ruth on July 5, 2005 12:58 PM

A good piece on bottled water can be found on the second DVD disc of the first season of Penn & Teller: Bullshit.

Definitely worth renting and watching.

Posted by: Hank on July 5, 2005 01:16 PM

Lewis Black does a much funnier piece on it (bottled water)...I saw him do it (in person) and I was howling...

Posted by: Ruth on July 5, 2005 01:44 PM

Damn! I put up with shit from my wife and daughter, nothing but bottled. Me, I keep a jug of tap water in the fridge. I'ts community well water, no chlorine, low ppm of every kind of shit they test for. This test is gonna get done at Eds Place. If they pass the tap water test, I got another one for them. THEY WILL ONLY DRINK ONE BRAND OF BOTTLED WATER BECAUSE IT TASTES BETTER THAN THE OTHER BOTTLED WATERS. BULLSHIT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Posted by: Ed on July 5, 2005 02:16 PM

Well Ed I am not a water snob, when I lived in the city and had city water (municipal water) I didnt even object to the least it was clear, clean and SOFT (we had suds and lather and no scale build up on the fixtures)

But since going "country" and having to live with well water and it being so terribly hard (iron, manganese, copper...etc) it just wreaks havoc with all the appliances not to mention (as I said) the pets health....If I was able to tap into a public water supply, I would ditch the bottled water in a heartbeat...

Posted by: Ruth on July 5, 2005 02:29 PM

Tap water here tastes like shit, but rather than spend all that money on bottled water we just use one of those Brita water filtering pitchers. It comes out tasting fine AND nice and ice cold from the fridge. That's worth $20 a year on filters to me.

Posted by: Grand Fromage on July 5, 2005 03:39 PM

Been here for 30 damn years and the city water tastes and smells like crap, but I still drink 7 or 8 ice cold glasses a day right out of the tap. When you work your ass off in the hot fucking TEXAS heat, ANY water will go down easy. You can take your fancy ass bottled water and put it where the sun obviously doesn't shine very often....where Y'ALL live.


Posted by: PJ on July 6, 2005 03:51 AM

I have always drank a lot of water (in my beer, in my coffee, etc), but I bought my wife a water filter for the sink earlier this year and discovered that you actually CAN taste the difference. Hell, I have never seen a reason to waste my money on bottled water before (and still don't) but there IS a difference.

Posted by: Richard on July 6, 2005 05:31 AM

She's got a younger set of taste-buds, and if she doesn't smoke then she probably CAN tell the diff.

Posted by: Ernest Brown on July 6, 2005 07:41 PM

I got a word for ya: Brita. We just hook the filter up to our kitchen sink and have filtered water all we want.

Trust me, down here in Ft. Buchanan, it's needed.

Posted by: Raging_Dave on July 10, 2005 09:22 AM
Post a comment

*Note: If you are commenting on an older entry, your
comment will not appear until it has been approved.
Do not resubmit it.