Gut Rumbles

June 30, 2005

my grandmother

She's 94 years old, half-blind, old and frail. But she can still take care of herself.

Two days ago, she went out in her back yard to check out her patch of beans that she's growing this year. She scared up about a foot-long snake from the bushes. It hissed at her, and she smashed its head flat with a brick. Then, she wobbled next door to fetch my Uncle Virgil. She wanted HIM to bury the snake.

Virgil took one look at the snake-corpse and exclaimed, "Mommie, that's a COPPERHEAD! That thing could have KILLED you!"

"Well, it ain't gonna kill anybody now. You go bury it." That's my grandmother. 94 years old and still meaner than a snake.

Bejus, but I love that woman.


"Bejus, but I love that woman. "

Don't tell us, tell her.

Posted by: og on June 30, 2005 08:30 PM

You must go see her more often! Every time I talk with her on the phone she tells me all about the last time you came to see her. She feels like she's being a burden to everyone and I had to explain to her on the phone just today how much I love having her around and how much I can't wait to visit with her. She loves when you come by. Can't wait to see her this weekend!

Posted by: Sam on June 30, 2005 08:44 PM

Granny is killing a copperhead, you are killing red ants, Catfish is watching a gator kill a dog, and everyone is talking about killing cats! Sounds real tame in your neck of the woods!

Posted by: Bonita on June 30, 2005 08:50 PM


This shit sure beats politics by a country mile!

Posted by: jb on June 30, 2005 09:38 PM

Go Granny Go! Show them how it's done!

Posted by: Maeve on June 30, 2005 10:02 PM

Go Granny go, you need to loan her to me for a week, she will help me get those gators, Cat

Posted by: catfish on June 30, 2005 10:05 PM

Your grandmother's generation took care of things for themselves. No calling 911 or waiting for the police to show up. Something needed tending to at that moment, they took care of it.

That is what she did. Once the snake was dead, she called someone to come over and take care of the carcus.

We have several generations in this country that don't understand that. God help us.

Posted by: Bob on June 30, 2005 11:01 PM

Ha. What a gem. I love this woman and I don't even know her. I hope I'm half the lady she is when I'm that age.

Posted by: Alli on June 30, 2005 11:42 PM

That is one cool lady.

Posted by: DaneBramage on July 1, 2005 12:10 AM

Yes Maam! Go Grandma!!!!

Posted by: Wendi on July 1, 2005 12:34 AM

Grandma has her priorities straight allright.

Like Alli, I think I love her too.

Posted by: StinKerr on July 1, 2005 01:16 AM

damn it's those little copperheads that are the nastiest ones. I hate those things. My grandma did too and would have done the xact same thing.

So yeah, Your grandma rocks.

Posted by: marcl on July 1, 2005 09:05 AM

Man...that is one tough cookie. She sounds like a gas.

Posted by: Moogie on July 1, 2005 09:22 AM

I bet she can still whip up one helluva good breakfast too.

Posted by: gravdigr on July 1, 2005 09:45 AM

You go, Mommie!!!

What an incredible lady....
Just wow.

Posted by: Stevie on July 1, 2005 10:54 AM

Your grandma sounds solid Jackson! And tis true enough...folks from that era, did take care of their own business...didn't wait for the law, or city services, cause there were none of them things when they were growing up...or they were too far away to be of any real *immediate* use. Wonder if she would like some of the *homemade wine* you produced. Might make for a good excuse to go see her this weekend.

Posted by: Guy S on July 1, 2005 11:29 AM

Reminds me of the time we had a big fat black rat snake in our garage.....

I yelled for my husband, and he took one look at it, and ran back in the house....(and left me with the job of "sweeping" it out out of the garage)

He can take a gun away from a criminal, but snakes isnt something he wants to deal with.....

And my neighbors had a big ole snake on top of their swimming pool cover and my son went over and dealt with that for them (as they all watched from the safety of the deck)

What is it about snakes that has most people pooping in their pants??

Posted by: Ruth on July 1, 2005 12:28 PM

I wanna be like her!

Posted by: Kelly on July 1, 2005 12:30 PM
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