Gut Rumbles

May 16, 2005

fan mail

Here is a missive I received from someone allegedly named "Susanna." She didn't like what I wrote a while back about obese children.

You are an idiot......if there were healthier meals available in schools this would not be a problem. You are older and things have changed. Schools are not serving the same healthy meals they did when you were young. Much of the funding set aside for school lunches has been cut and subsidized by vending machine companies and fast food funds. You say, "I AM SKINNY". Well, good for you. You have obviously never had a wieght problem and could never understand how much of a struggle it is to maintain a good wieght. You are a fucker and should keep your prejudiced, ignorant, redneck mouth shut!!! Fuck you very much!!!

She'll make someone a GREAT wife.

I still find it amazing that people want to blame school lunches for fat children. I recall eating most of my meals AT HOME when I was growing up. Maybe that (and the fact that I played sports, climbed trees, ran the woods and seldom sat on my ass for any extended period of time EXCEPT in school) is why I never got fat.

But it's all the school's fault now, and we require government intervention. Yeah. Right. Of course, I don't know what I'm talking about, because I am "a fucker and should keep your prejudiced, ignorant, redneck mouth shut!!!"

Susanna, you are FAT, and you should learn to keep your pie-hole shut around food.


I am fat-according to my doc about 40 pounds of blubber to fat. But I damn sure can't blame it on school lunches or fast food franchises. The problem is the unwillingness to exercise those table muscles-the muscles used to push myself away from the table.

Posted by: GUYK on May 16, 2005 11:18 AM

Gracious! I get so sick and tired of people placing the blame for some situation on someone else. We are as a whole, an obese society because we eat too much and don't get enough physical activity. My husband grew concerned recently when he went from 123 lbs. to 138 lbs. Did I have any good advice on a diet for him to make sure he didn't gain anymore? He wants to stay at his current weight so that he can buy his pants in the mens department.

"Yeah, don't eat so much fuckin food."

Posted by: Susie T on May 16, 2005 11:22 AM

There's always the option to pack your kids lunch.

Posted by: livey on May 16, 2005 11:32 AM

I'm fat. It has to do with how much I eat, and not with a conspiracy of Acidman and vending machine owners. Neither could make me skinny nor keep me fat without my constant collusion.

Posted by: Murel Bailey on May 16, 2005 11:44 AM

Most schools only feed one meal a day, how the hell does anyone get fat on one meal a day? I guess the 5 Mcdonalds hamburgers for supper didn't have a damn thing to do with it.

Posted by: James Old Guy on May 16, 2005 11:49 AM

I'll bet $$ that Suzanna stops at a McDonald's to pick up dinner for the kids on the way home each evening ... All hail, Domino's Pizza.

Posted by: Max on May 16, 2005 12:08 PM

I am 6' 6" tall and weigh 325lbs. Sure, I'm fat. Nobody caused it but me. Wanna stop by and call me fat to my face? I eat skinny people for snacks. :-)

Posted by: assrot on May 16, 2005 12:11 PM

Careful about those snacks, Assrot -- those skinny people actually contain a lot of fat, between their ears.

Posted by: McGehee on May 16, 2005 12:20 PM

I'm 46 years old and fat. I blame myself.

Posted by: Robert on May 16, 2005 12:44 PM

Around here, at least, schools still provide fairly nutritious foods for breakfast and lunch. Most of the kids who eat unhealthy foods for lunch are those who brown-bag their lunch (and according to some school officials, appear to have packed their junk-food heavy lunches themselves).

Posted by: Robin S. on May 16, 2005 12:49 PM

I'm fat and have only myself to blame too. I've been down to "fightin' trim" three times in the last forty years due to boot camp, illness or my own endeavor and have eventually gotten back out of shape.

I like to eat. There are some things I never can get enough of, and when exercise is a four letter word what do you expect?

I am jealous of skinny people who can eat twice what I do. Some day they'll drink a glass of water and it'll all come back to them and they'll swell up like an elephant. At least that's what I tell 'em.

Posted by: StinKerr on May 16, 2005 01:49 PM

Once again, blame the lawyers. If there was dodgeball, as crazy as it was when I was in elementary, and someone got smacked with one of those large, hot, red rubber balls, there'd be suing all around. I'd have bruises from that crap, but I was skinny as a rail. And I ate pizza, turkey stew, and all the other crap that was served in that cafeteria.

Posted by: cythen on May 16, 2005 01:53 PM

Hell yes! Blame it on the damn lawyers and take the pressure off the Bush administration. Personally belive that junk food is a communist plot that was planned years ago and and we are just now seeing its effect. Old Kruschef or whoever slammed his shoe on the desk and said he was going to bury us. Maybe this is what he was yelling about. Big macskis.

Posted by: GUYK on May 16, 2005 02:03 PM

Why can't people accept responsiblity for them selves and their families?
You choose to squirt out kids, then YOU raise them. YOU teach them to eat proper, don't keep junk food in the house and turn off the goddamn t.v and video games. Get the fuck up off the couch and go OUTSIDE to play!

Posted by: Maeve on May 16, 2005 02:54 PM

Sure fire diet. Shut your mouth.

Posted by: Brett on May 16, 2005 03:09 PM

Amen Rob! You hit the nail right on the head! My mother-in-law is the food service coordinator for the school system she and my wife work in and she always plans the healthiest she can. That aside, this is south Georgia and Southern grandmothers can cook whether they're at home or at work in the school lunchroom, and they're cooking hasn't changed in decades.

Finally, when parents started using Playstations, X-box's, and televisions, that was the beginning of all this overweight mess. Like you, school was the only time I was ever still, if I wasn't in school, I was running all over the neighborhood.

Posted by: Leuthen on May 16, 2005 08:21 PM

I wasn't a fat child or teen but once I got a job and found out about the "lunch hour" ...

I remember wonderful lunches when I was in school. Not only were they delicious, but they were healthful. Well, perhaps not by today's standards when everyone appears (or pretends) to be SO health conscious. Yet, the food in schools today is horrific compared to when I was a child.

Plus, back then, you had an hour for lunch and "recess" to work (run, skip, and play) that big lunch off and another "recess" in the afternoon.

No camping out in front of the computer or TV at home either. When i got home, if I had homework, I did it, and then it was outside to play until called in for supper.

Kids today don't know what they are missing.

Posted by: Joni on May 17, 2005 01:21 AM

It's the fuckin' electricity man. If it weren't for fuckin electricity we wouldn't have all these fancy toys that keep our asses attached to our couches, and we wouldn't have microwaves either. I say we get rid of electricity and the problem's solved.

Posted by: Sticky B on May 17, 2005 12:39 PM

School lunches make kids fat? You've GOT to be f'ing kidding. Six hours a day sitting in front of a Playstation while using a pile of junkfood wrappers for a cushion is much more likely.
Try using a paintscraper to remove little junior's ass from the couch, pry the controller out of his/her hands, and send him/her outside to play.
Get a grip. (On something besides a fistfull of Oreos, that is..)

Posted by: Jack in TX on May 18, 2005 08:45 AM

I know what you've been eating, and I'm going to TURN YOU IN!

Ahem, excuse me...

Want to swap links?

Posted by: Sgt. Belcher on May 22, 2005 10:48 AM
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