Gut Rumbles

April 27, 2005

back by popular demand

Okay, I am over my temper tantrum now and I'm going to blog again. If I quit now, that makes me a quitter and I've NEVER been one of those in my life. A LOT of people sent me emails encouraging me to continue ("if you quit, the terrorists win") and I appreciate that.

But I believe the best one came from juliette, who said--- "Don't quit. You NEED this." For someone I've never met, she knows me pretty well.

I just have one last thing to say about this crap: I have no respect at all for people who want to dance in the the rain and then bitch when their hair gets wet.


Good for you. Screw what everyone else thinks, including me.

Posted by: Scott P on April 27, 2005 11:03 AM

cool. :)

Posted by: Desert Cat on April 27, 2005 11:08 AM


I was worried there for a minute.

Posted by: Kevin Baker on April 27, 2005 11:09 AM

Glad you changed your mind Rob.

Posted by: DaveH on April 27, 2005 11:10 AM

my god....i already made an appointment here at memorial for a psych visit.

guess i'll cancel.


Posted by: heather on April 27, 2005 11:13 AM

Thanks. Now: Crap stories, please!!!

Posted by: og on April 27, 2005 11:18 AM

Yeah, where's the poop.

Glad you're over your snit.

Posted by: caltechgirl on April 27, 2005 11:21 AM


Juliette was probably right, we all need an outlet for our frustrations and anger.
Welcome back, Rob.

Posted by: Denise on April 27, 2005 11:22 AM

I've gotten over the blogcrap and I'm glad you have to.

I don't think anyone really thought you would quit anyway. We all know you're just not a quitter.

Posted by: Sam on April 27, 2005 11:24 AM



Posted by: Ronda on April 27, 2005 11:27 AM

Thank goodness you came to your senses before I had to write one of my epistles!!!

Posted by: Indigo on April 27, 2005 11:40 AM

I'm glad you're not a quitter! Petulant I can handle!

Posted by: Ed on April 27, 2005 11:45 AM

You're a true writer. You had no choice.

Posted by: WitNit on April 27, 2005 11:50 AM

Pleased to see the Mountain Man is not AWOL after all.

Posted by: Maggie on April 27, 2005 11:58 AM

You need to do it 9 more times to catch up with Rachel Lucas.

Posted by: Laurence Simon on April 27, 2005 12:01 PM


Posted by: Sharon on April 27, 2005 12:04 PM

Your Mom is smiling. You made her proud.

Keep plugging.

Posted by: Smitty on April 27, 2005 12:06 PM

Hey, Smif !

I laughed out loud when you said "I Quit" because I knew, just as you did when you keyed those words, that they were bullshit. That post served better as a "Carnival of the Crappers" than anything else. You farted in editorial public, and waited to see who said what about the stink.

Yeah, I agree that you are fucked up. So am I. So are most folks. Kerr-McGee's stock doubled, I see. That seems even more fucked up. Check with a broker before you sell anything.

Life is fucked up, but the only way out is even more fucked up.

Life is all we got, Bubba of Bombast (my puter loads slowly, so I always get that before your pic loads), so live with it.

And thanks for your e-mail . . . it was a touching reminder of the bullshit among bullshitters we share so well.


Posted by: jb on April 27, 2005 12:09 PM

I knew it wasn't true. You just weren't getting enough attention and needed everyone to sling praise your way. Ego stroking. The thing is, you might seriously think about taking a break because your blog has been boring lately and you need something new. I only read when you're in crisis mode to amuse myself by witnessing the deconstruction of a egomaniac with an inferiority complext.

Have you thought about going back to work. Actually getting a job? Some people do better in a structured environment and I do believe you're one of those.

Is there anybody who'd have you? Or have you burned all your bridges by your intemperant behavior and loutish attitude? Maybe you could volunteer somewhere (not near children!) until you find some purpose in your life again apart from the usual sociopathic self-aggrandisement.

Just a thought.

Posted by: Beth on April 27, 2005 12:11 PM

Kudos to Beth on her insights.

Yeah--you need to work.

Here's the proposal, Smif . . . Since you are currently unemployed . . . you are only a few bucks from hanging out at freeway exits with a sign saying "Will Work for Food."

Truth is--you need to work--no matter the size of your bank account.

You get over here, and since you got bucks to spare, money will not be an issue for you.

In one day I will train you to use every bit of everything you ever learned managing people in your previous career, toward something worthwhile. If you pan out, so to speak, you can build your own little empire if you wish.

Yeah, there's good money in it, but I suspect you would rather have the self-respect of having performed well. The only "boss" is you . . . so when you have a bitch you only need to check out the mirror as you shave.

Up to a real challenge? C'mon over. We can argue politics and philosophy every day on the road.

Again--thanks for the e-mail. Made my day!


Posted by: jb on April 27, 2005 12:24 PM

Thank Godzilla, You had me scared that I was going to have to find somewhere else to go to get my daily fill of common and comic sense. Glad your in a better mood. Gripy old fart.

Posted by: gravdigr on April 27, 2005 12:31 PM

I think he should work with kids, he'd teach them all sorts of colorful words........

Posted by: Maeve on April 27, 2005 12:42 PM

Volunteer? Screw that. Such a thieving society deserves nothing for free.

Besides, blogging is voluntarism

Posted by: Brett on April 27, 2005 12:44 PM

It rained

Your hair (what's left of it) got wet

You bitched . . .

But then, you found your hair dryer.

:-) And the crowd goes wild!


Posted by: jb on April 27, 2005 12:50 PM

My afternoons would be totally in the "crapper" without you to entertain me. I only come to work so I can see what you are up to!

Posted by: Anastasia on April 27, 2005 01:19 PM

Could I get Jennifers phone number from you?

Posted by: fuckifiknow on April 27, 2005 01:21 PM

still waiting for the carnival of crappers

Posted by: Ron on April 27, 2005 01:25 PM

whoo hoo! Now I can drink a beer or two in honor of your return!

Posted by: hoosierboy on April 27, 2005 01:47 PM

Glad to see you decided to roll with the punches and keep on blogging. You really should check out Poop Report when you're feeling down. It will make anybody laugh their ass off.

Posted by: assrot on April 27, 2005 02:27 PM

Welcome back!

Posted by: Chablis on April 27, 2005 02:28 PM

Goddamn it! How the fuck am I going to sell the 4000 blackmarket Gut Rumbles Memorial Mouse Pads I just ordered now?? You know how hard it is to get INS to deport the illegals in that sweatshop so I don't have to pay the bill!?!?


Oh yeah, glad to have you back... :)

Posted by: Graumagus on April 27, 2005 03:31 PM

Well, thank goodness!

I thought it was a stunt to get us all riled up, like the things you say to get people mad or to encourage boobie-talk.

Then I started to worry. Anyway, glad you're back!!

Posted by: Grace on April 27, 2005 03:58 PM

I half expected this would happen. Sometimes we get so pissed off we're willing to throw the whole show out the window, and then cool down a day later and get everything back where it was before.

I would have missed this place dearly, since you've posted some of the best funny, solemnly reflective, and un-PC stuff I've ever seen.

Posted by: JG22 on April 27, 2005 04:07 PM

Good you didn't throw the keyboard out the window in haste. Welcome back.

Posted by: DJSloan/Houston on April 27, 2005 04:20 PM

Glad to see you got OVER it and that your back.

Posted by: Tom on April 27, 2005 04:35 PM

Cool Hand Luke never gave up, so we knew you wouldn't. You got that southern thing about you where no matter how bad the beating you get back up again. [Note provacative lack of capitalization on "southern" even though everyone knows it's "Southern."]

Posted by: Murel Bailey on April 27, 2005 05:06 PM

As I posted before.....

"Your choice, Rob.
Leave blogging. That is ok.
Leave blogging and then return to blogging. Well, that is ok also.
Guest blog elsewhere. Good for you.
I have enjoyed your blog.
Good luck and enjoy."

But remember the last word of the last line.

Welcome back, Rob.

Posted by: Timothy on April 27, 2005 05:12 PM

Damn, I thought it would take til Friday

Posted by: rightisright on April 27, 2005 05:59 PM

Welcome back.

Posted by: Gmac on April 27, 2005 06:13 PM

Thank God you're back!!! I was "Jonesing" here.

You know we would have missed you too much and dragged you back kicking and screaming the whole way, don'cha?

Posted by: Wichi Dude on April 27, 2005 07:47 PM

Beth, you are a retard. You must get off on being such a persistant troll.

Posted by: sumner on April 27, 2005 07:50 PM

Excelent! made my day when i saw you were back up. good to have you back!

Posted by: Heath on April 27, 2005 08:58 PM

*grin and a bear hug*

Posted by: Stevie on April 27, 2005 09:12 PM

Glad you will continue to blog. You're the first one I go to every night. We need your wit and wisdom.

Posted by: Scalplock1845 on April 27, 2005 09:42 PM

"I have no respect at all for people who want to dance in the the rain and then bitch when their hair gets wet."
Sheeshhhhhhh ... I TOLD you to stay away from my ex!!!!! :D

Posted by: maggot on April 27, 2005 09:45 PM

Good to have you back, but..that's twice you grouchy old bastard! I don't know if the hundred or thousands of us will continue to pull you back from the brink the next time. HA HA

Posted by: Barry on April 27, 2005 11:35 PM

Beth Rocks!

I also only read when your life is in crisis ....Otherwise, it's those damn boring stories about when you were plant manager......

Posted by: kendall on April 28, 2005 01:17 AM

Well, guess I'll get out my ole wading boots and take in the storm. I hear it can be pretty brisk out there...

Posted by: Bonita on April 28, 2005 07:43 AM

Whew, I was going to wait a month and yank down your link but you didn't even hold out that long.

Welcome back!

Posted by: Sean on April 28, 2005 11:45 AM

When I read that you quit, I stopped visiting for a few days. I figured you had stopped. But I'm glad you continued. You are the only blog I read on a daily basis. Other than being wrong about Texas, our views are in line on almost everything. I can even forgive your anti-Texas rants, being from Georgia like you are. I guess if I couldn't live in Texas, I'd probably choose Georgia.

Posted by: Harold Foster on April 28, 2005 03:28 PM

Glad I came back.

Posted by: Terry on April 28, 2005 03:56 PM

Glad to see you're back, Rob.

Posted by: peggy on April 28, 2005 05:01 PM

Fuck you! You big pussy, I have a 15 year old daughter that pulls the same drama queen shit............I like grumpy old men and mean old muthafuckers..........You are a neither, just an insecure old fraud........bummer

Posted by: Billy Budd on April 28, 2005 11:31 PM


Posted by: Juliette on April 29, 2005 07:01 PM
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