Gut Rumbles
 

April 24, 2005

no damn way!

American Cities That Best Fit You:

65% Las Vegas
65% Seattle
60% Austin
60% Portland
55% Atlanta

Las Vegas I can understand, but SEATTLE? PORTLAND? AUSTIN? ATLANTA???? I would rather die and go to hell than live in ANY of those places. I would fit in at Seattle of Portland like a turd in a punchbowl. Austin is the the San Francisco of Texas, and I would get pissed off at the locals there, too. Atlanta just plain sucks and I don't like the traffic or the racial politics there.

My personal picks? Blairsville, Georgia. Charlotte, North Carolina. Key West, Florida.

Comments

It depends on where you live around Austin . I grew up in Austin, spent the last nine years on the coast of California and moved back to Austin last summer. I live on the outskirts, have a beautiful view of Lake Travis, paid almost half of what I got for my 2500 sq ft California home for a 3500 sq ft home here and am in solid Bush country. Yeah, Austin proper has been inundated with the lefties, but Austin still has great BBQ, great Tex-Mex, great music, beautiful scenery and the people are nice despite the influx of Californians.

Posted by: Gary on April 24, 2005 04:15 PM

I think the test is rigged, no ,matter how I answer I get Austin and Las Vegas as answers.

Posted by: hoosierboy on April 24, 2005 04:55 PM

Having finished high school and college (Univ of Wash) in Seattle-7 years worth-I feel qualified to both diss it and give it its kudos.Also, just visited friends and family there two weeks ago. It is extraordinarily beautiful. The weather has been weirdly unbad for awhile.
Land and home prices are insane.

They have, and I'm not making this up, laws, ordinances, whatever, that make it illegal to put recyclables in your garbage. Environmental police as it were.
Really, seriously.
Portland must be worse.

I was tempted to wear strips of bacon around my neck holding two cigarettes in my mouth as I deplaned. While throwing my empties on the terminal floor.

Posted by: bbking on April 24, 2005 05:20 PM

I'm with Hoosierboy. I couldn't get it to recommend anything other than Austin and Las Vegas.

Then I turned the tables, and answered with all the characteristics I don't want or don't care about in a town: lots of "cultural activities" (theater, bars, museums, zoos), high crime, high taxes, live in a small apartment, and use public transportation.

The result:

NYC, Philly, Chicago, Boston, DC

At least it's helpful in identifying where *not* to live, then again, I think I already knew that.

Posted by: Grumpy Old Ham on April 24, 2005 06:41 PM

80% Honolulu
70% Atlanta
70% Miami
65% Austin
65% Seattle

Posted by: Maggie on April 24, 2005 06:48 PM

Hey, it said I should live in Atlanta! It's fucking psychic!

Posted by: Kelley on April 24, 2005 07:22 PM

Test is rigged or bogus. Not a single one of my answers would have indicated Seattle, yet that is where I got 65%. Piffle.

Posted by: Indigo on April 24, 2005 07:46 PM

75% Miami
65% Austin
65% Honolulu
65% Seattle
60% Atlanta

My responses were:
I want four seasons.
Don't care about skiing.
I would love to live near the ocean.
Theater district is not important.
Although I do love museums..
Zoos/gardens are not a must..
Ethnic diversity not a priority (yeah, yeah, yeah - I'm un-PC. Tough)
I drive.
I own my home and would prefer to continue to do so (although....no maintenance options like condos/apt are becoming more and more appealing).
I want clean air.
Colleges/universities aren't a consideration.
Low crime is a priority.
No kids to worry about (two have already moved out and by the time I ever move again, the last one will be in college)
Low taxes would be nice.
I don't eat at restaurants much.
Or go to bars.
I'm ot looking for love.
And I don't need a job.
I'm not a fitness nut.
I'd prefer to live in the South (live in northern California now)

Posted by: Trish on April 24, 2005 08:16 PM

I live in Atlanta. I don't care for liberals--I'm a red-stater. I don't like it raining all the time. I do like it to rain some of the time, and I want it to get cold enough to kill the bugs. I don't particularly care for a lot of people above the Mason-Dixon Line. I want to be near SEC football. My conclusion? That is one bad test based upon these results:

American Cities That Best Fit You:
70% Seattle
55% Chicago
50% Austin
50% Honolulu
50% Los Angeles

Posted by: Woody on April 24, 2005 10:05 PM

I dunno. I came out Austin, Denver, Seattle and Vegas.

I have lived in Denver and Seattle, loved'em both. I have spent a lot of time in Vegas and would like to live there. Austin? Not really impressed based on my trips there, but I didn't think much of Denver until I lived there.

Posted by: Poker Player on April 25, 2005 12:13 AM

Amen on Key West.

I wish they hadn't widened the bridges to make it easier for the spring breakers and the yuppies to show up and crowd out everything.

Posted by: Virgil on April 25, 2005 03:24 AM

I would fit in at Seattle of Portland like a turd in a punchbowl.

You say that like it's a bad thing. Actually, from what I've heard, "punchbowl" is less of an apt description than -- well, let's just say that a turd would be more at home in those places than not.

But since you're not a turd, I guess your assessment stands. Heh.

Posted by: McGehee on April 25, 2005 07:35 AM

And, having taken the test, I suspect there are only seven or eight possible cities in the pool. I got Las Vegas and Denver at the top, then Austin, Atlanta and Seattle.

Posted by: McGehee on April 25, 2005 07:39 AM

I am so sick of big cities. I grew up in Chicago and south Philly and spent 25 years in downtown shithole(Denver)I live in the foothills now, in a town that has 15,000 people. No crime, I know my neighbors and when I need to get away, I've got 17 acres 25 miles north of Steamboat Springs. I have business that takes me to Atlanta several times a year and the traffic there is amazing. Seattle is beautiful, great food, but crappy weather and way too liberal. I've been to Austin several times and man, was it hot. Dittos for Vegas.
The only drawback to Colorado are the winters. I just don't like cold weather like I used to. I'm going to get a winter getaway in the Caribbean. Of course than I'll be bitching about the effing bugs.

Posted by: MM on April 25, 2005 08:08 AM

I am so sick of big cities. I grew up in Chicago and south Philly and spent 25 years in downtown shithole(Denver)I live in the foothills now, in a town that has 15,000 people. No crime, I know my neighbors and when I need to get away, I've got 17 acres 25 miles north of Steamboat Springs. I have business that takes me to Atlanta several times a year and the traffic there is amazing. Seattle is beautiful, great food, but crappy weather and way too liberal. I've been to Austin several times and man, was it hot. Dittos for Vegas.
The only drawback to Colorado are the winters. I just don't like cold weather like I used to. I'm going to get a winter getaway in the Caribbean. Of course than I'll be bitching about the effing bugs.

Posted by: MM on April 25, 2005 08:09 AM

What about New Orleans??

Posted by: Christina on April 25, 2005 08:15 AM

I am so sick of big cities. I grew up in Chicago and south Philly and spent 25 years in downtown shithole(Denver)I live in the foothills now, in a town that has 15,000 people. No crime, I know my neighbors and when I need to get away, I've got 17 acres 25 miles north of Steamboat Springs. I have business that takes me to Atlanta several times a year and the traffic there is amazing. Seattle is beautiful, great food, but crappy weather and way too liberal. I've been to Austin several times and man, was it hot. Dittos for Vegas.
The only drawback to Colorado are the winters. I just don't like cold weather like I used to. I'm going to get a winter getaway in the Caribbean. Of course than I'll be bitching about the effing bugs.

Posted by: MM on April 25, 2005 09:42 AM

That test doesn't know what it's talking about. I'm from Seattle and LOVE that city. My results- 65% San Diego
60% Miami
55% Los Angeles
50% Honolulu
50% Portland
I have no desire to live in any of those cities, and wouldn't ever set FOOT in Miami or LA.
The test,it LIES!

Posted by: coastygirl on April 25, 2005 11:03 PM
Post a comment














*Note: If you are commenting on an older entry, your
comment will not appear until it has been approved.
Do not resubmit it.