Gut Rumbles
 

April 01, 2005

eating bird

Everybody eats chicken. cooked all kinds if ways. Telling me that you had chichen for Lunch, EVEN IF IT WAS REALLY GOOD, does not impress me. I can show show an industrial park in Charleston, South Carolina, that slaughters 1.5 MILLION chickens every day. And they use everything but the last squawk from those birds.

Let's talk about eating interesting poultry.

* Some people like duck. I don't. It is greasy, dark meat that tastes rancid to me.

* I like quail. They are fun to shoot, but you need a lot of them to make a meal. Only the breast is any good to eat, and they are small birds. But a mess of fried quail is good eating, especially with okra, cornbread and pinto beans.

* Ever tasted a Guinea Hen? They resemble a miniature turkey but don't taste nearly as good. They eat too much wild food.

* I know a lot of people who like dove hunting. Other than killing the birds, I don't know why. A dove tastes worse than a duck does to me.

* Turkey. I'll put up a $100 bet that says I can cook a turkey better than you can, and I accept all comers on this wager. I once hurt my mama's feelings badly on Thanksgiving when we had a mini-family reunion. We both cooked turkeys and people ate every scrap of mine and left half of hers untouched. The only thing that saved her pride that day was she tasted my turkey and admitted, "Rob... I hate to say it, but this is a lot better than mine."

I have a secret.

What kind of bird do YOU like to eat?

(Yeah. I know waht a "bird" means in England and Austraila. Perverts.)

Comments

I would venture a guess that YOU DO cook a better turkey then I do...so I won't even go there...as a matter of fact..I may show up at YOUR house for Thanksgiving cause I HATE cooking the damn things! LOL!

Posted by: Wendi on April 1, 2005 06:12 PM

I'll take your bet...You're gonna regret...Cause I'm the best that's ever been. No Brag, Just Fact! Just Damn!

Posted by: Dax Montana on April 1, 2005 06:23 PM

As far as I can recall, I have only had duck in the form of Peking Duck at a resaurant in Springfield, MA called The Peking Duck House. It was fantastic! Not cheap, but quite good. Thing is, it's meat cooked a Chinese way and served in pieces on "pancakes" with other stuff and sauce, so I'd expect any game or oil taste to be well hidden or reduced.

Otherwise just chicken and turkey, both of which I cook well, but I have so far only ever cooked two turkeys, so no doubt yours would blow mine away. I haven't done it enough to even come up with a set recipe I always want to use. Still experimenting.

Posted by: Jay on April 1, 2005 06:27 PM

.. I generally don't like eating bird.. but, I saw an ostrich on the menu today, and couldn't pass it up... it reminded me a lot of dove.. but they had so many peppercorns on it, it was hard to discern the exact flavor... the potatoes were awesome though...

Posted by: Eric on April 1, 2005 06:48 PM

Dax, you're ON! When, where and who will be the taste-testers?

We'll do it blind ---Plate "A" versus Plate "B" with no fixins. Just turkey.

I'll kick your Cracker ass.

Posted by: Acidman on April 1, 2005 07:00 PM

"What kind of bird do YOU like to eat? "

Loaded question.

Any English commenters want to take a crack at that question?

Posted by: Grace on April 1, 2005 07:40 PM

It's gotta be a guy thing, learning & knowing how to cook a turkey properly.

I cook mine unstuffed in a conventional roaster pan in the oven. I put 4 basil leaves and a 16 oz can of Colt 45 in the roaster to start, plus a little H2O. I have my own mix of mild spices that don't go on until 30 mins before basting & browning.

I never let my oven temp exceed 300F.

Meat thermometers are for pussies. You can tell when it's done just by poking it with a fork. I think it comes out of the oven even juicier than it went in! Tender as overboiled potatoes too.

Knowing how to roast a turkey is a Man's domain, along with hickory smoking game hens, pheasant and country hams. It was "Man" who mastered fire.

You DO have your own smokehouse, don't you Rob?

Go right ahead and steal my "secrets", friends. Assault a loved one in the taste buds this weekend.

Posted by: Richthofen on April 1, 2005 07:58 PM

I will, Grace. I like to eat Carnaby Street birds.

Posted by: Velociman on April 1, 2005 08:04 PM

And: nice Guns of Will Sonnett reference, Dax. I smell you inner Walter Brennan from here.

Although I regret to say my bird will kick both of you pretenders' asses.

Posted by: Velociman on April 1, 2005 08:12 PM

Velociman,

"I like to eat Carnaby Street birds"

Groovy, man.

Posted by: Grace on April 1, 2005 09:23 PM

Almost anyone can make a good turkey if they put it a brine overnight. I tried it a couple of years ago at the suggestion of Alton Brown, who BTW lives in Georgia, and I'll never make one without it again. As far as making the best, I'm not ready to go that far. But my Georgia Peach Momma could give you a run for your money.

Posted by: DianeK on April 1, 2005 09:26 PM

Nice and simple method:

De-gizzard the bird. Engaging in sex with the hollow corpse is solely your prerogative.

Brine the beast overnight. Sea salt and good ole agua.

Fry it in a hot oil fryer.

You can't go wrong. Never had a bad one done that way.

Posted by: rightisright on April 1, 2005 09:27 PM

Marinated overnight with a cajun injector and deep fried in peanut oil is the only way to eat turkey. I've had it every way possible and while smoked is pretty good, deep fried turkey is the best. It's juicy and extremely tasty.

Posted by: Dash on April 1, 2005 09:41 PM

Peanut earl sounds good, Dash. Have to give that a try.

Posted by: rightisright on April 1, 2005 10:05 PM

I cooked chicken tonight, since my daughter came to town, she is on a diet. I cooked those breasts in the oven, had wild rice and fresh green beans and squash. And V-man, anyone that will eat potted meat, will suck a dick, Cat.

Posted by: catfish on April 2, 2005 12:25 AM

I love duck, especially peking duck, something about the hoisin/plum sauce, spring onions and duck rolled together in the crepe like pancakes. And my mother-in-law used to serve a goose casserole back when my father-in-law hunted around Xmas time. Rock cornish hens are like small chickens, nothing really special.

Damn, now I want peking duck...

I'm about 2 hours west from Atlanta, Acidman. Let me know if you need an unbiased food tester for your turkey bake-off, I'll bring something other than turkey to share.

Posted by: Hunter on April 2, 2005 01:05 PM

My sister's turkey is the best on earth. She puts a frozen turkey in a brine of tenderquick, sugar cure, liquid smoke and water for about 4 days. Stores it in the fridge to defrost. As it defrosts it absorbs the salt and smoke.

Posted by: summer on April 2, 2005 05:43 PM

Bring your bird on A-man and V-man. Boiled, Roasted, Smoked, or Fried, I'll stomp your taste buds into submission. Have bird, will travel. Just Damn!

Posted by: Dax Montana on April 2, 2005 07:59 PM

I see a few have figured it out. Brine is the secret. You should also cook upside down until the end when you brown it. Forces all the jucies into the breast you see.

Posted by: Ed on April 4, 2005 09:23 AM
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