Gut Rumbles

February 05, 2005


I've been fairly skinny most of my life, even when I lifted weights and worked hard to be buff. I've had six-pack abs and delts that really stood out when I did the frog-pose. I could leg-press 600 pounds when I was 20 years old. I could bench-press 270 pounds when I weighed 140.

I've wasted away into a piece of shit now, but I NEVER developed back tits. You know, those flab-layers that circle your armpits and resemble TITS on your back? You've seen 'em on fat guys, and a lot of wimmen have them, too. That's WRAP-AROUND fat, and I think it's disgusting. When you get so fat that you have titties on your BACK, you need to look in the mirror and do something about that.

this guy has back-tits. I'll bet he never saw a large pizza that he couldn't eat all by himself. Guys with back-tits can't look down and see their own dicks. Too much belly in the way. And WIMMEN with back-tits have that mysterious "lost pussy," which is just one more wrinkle buried in a bunch. Climb aboard and probe. Good luck.

Yeah. I'm trashing fat people today, because I ain't one, and I'm tired of hearing fat people bitch about second-hand smoke killing their fat asses. Light a cigarette and you'll piss 'em off. Wave a piece of corn on the cob and you'll have them fighting for it like the hogs they are. And they wonder why they have back-tits.

Fuck 'em.


What blows me away is when grotesquely fat people claim it is a DISABILITY - and get away with it!
Where I work, we have had to triple the number of handicapped parking spaces in the last two years for one reason and one reason only - the fat people getting a note from their doctor, saying it would endanger them to walk an extra 50 feet to the front door. I watch them struggle out of their cars and waddle in to work every morning, as I walk the 200-yards plus from my parking spot, which was steadily moved out to make way for the fatties to park their lard butts close in. Sigh ...

Posted by: maggot on February 5, 2005 02:27 PM

They need to move there packing spaces 400 yards from the office. That is the problem now, we eat the same shit, but NO one does anything anymore, get off your asses and move, walk, run, skip, bike, fuck, just do someting, maybe some of that fat will be gone soon and also slow down on the eating. If you want to lose, you can.

Posted by: Catfish on February 5, 2005 03:19 PM

Oh lord, I just pissed myself. You really should put all these things into a book !

Posted by: Moxie on February 5, 2005 04:16 PM

(Holding a cigar in one hand and a four pound sub sandwich in the other)
Fuck you, I can't see my back tits and as long as I can see my dick without bending over I'm a happy man!
(Blows smoke ring, eats sandwich)

Posted by: Graumagus on February 5, 2005 05:15 PM

What Graumaugus said. Sort of. Minus the dick part. And I don't smoke anymore, even though I don't hate cigs. But his sentiment is superb.

Funny, you really do seem to get PMS at the same time of the month as me...

Posted by: Amy on February 5, 2005 05:57 PM

Goddamn it, quit posting my picture, you skinny old crackhead.

I'm fat and I STILL hate fat people.

More of them to hate. That's what I say.

You know who I admire? I said it the other day. Paul Prudhomme. The huge chef who got so fat he had to have his ass mounted on an electric cart? "Overeating is more important to me than the use of my legs! More gumbo! NOW!"

That's hardcore.

Posted by: Steve H. on February 5, 2005 05:59 PM

Well, after checkin' that link Rob, I gotta say, If'n I can walk down the road with a lady that's got as fine a hind end as that "back titted" fella, shit, where's the buffet? I smoke like a chimney, drink like a fish, and will probably die like a dove shot out of the East Carolina sky, just fold right up and hit the ground, but damn she was fine.

If you're gonna be "big" and the gut/dick thing bugs ya, keep eatin' ang drow a bigger pecker. Shoot, now I get it, that's how the back tittied boy got that girl, he grew a pecker big enough to see without leanin' over and gut tuckin'.

Posted by: RedNeck on February 6, 2005 12:05 AM
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