Gut Rumbles

December 29, 2004

fan mail

Here's a nice email from some dickwit who calls himself ""

You self-righteous son of a bitch, you'll get what's coming to you... right-wing imperialistic motherfuckers who squander the world's resources in order to ensure the gratuitous accumulation of capital for personal gain - such as yourself - are better off dead.

Let's see if I can grasp his point, if he has one.

I am a self-righteous son of a bitch. Okay, I can handle that. A LOT of people think that way about me and I don't give a shit WHAT they think. I'd rather be a self-righteous son of a bitch than a flaming asshole who calls himself fuckoff@die.

You'll get what coming to you. I believe that I already have. I am retired and living comfortably, if not lavishly, at the age of 52. That ain't bad for a hillbilly born in a coal mining camp in Harlan County, Kentucky. And I got it all by myself, too. I can accept this fate.

I am a right-wing imperialist motherfucker.. I am definitely more conservative than leftist, but I wouldn't describe myself as right-wing on anything but defense and economic issues. I am politically incorrect, but I am proud to be an American. If that makes me an imperialist motherfucker, I stand guilty as charged.

I squander the world's resources in order to ensure the gratuitous accumulation of capital for personal gain. I always thought what I did was called "WORK," and I was paid for my labor, but maybe I'm wrong. I took an ore found in sand all over the world and "squandered" it into TiO2 pigment, which was then used in everything from paint to paper, to plastics, to toothpaste, to sunscreen to M&M candy. I think the point here is that humanity was better off when that ore lay unused in the sand. Gaia was happier then.

I'm better off dead. If communist asswipes such as Fuckoff ever take over, I totally agree. In the meantime, however, I intend to enjoy my "gratuitous accumulation of capital for personal gain." I earned it, and it's MINE. Isn't that a selfish attitude?

I have some advice for Fuckoff: FUCK OFF, you pathetic, leftist whinebag.


Aren't Commies cute when they're angry?

Makes me just want to shoot 'em!

Posted by: Kevin Baker on December 29, 2004 08:53 AM

I think you've mis-interpreted what Mr. Fuckoff meant. He thinks you're an asshole. Plain and simple. Not that there's anything wrong with that.

He also was probably trying to get a rise out of you. Admit it Rob, you can be an asshole when responding to ideological challenges.

Of course, you were modest (yeah!) in your patient (oh yeah!) understanding (fuck yeah) and entertaining (shit-fuck yeah) in your reply.

It's a good think you don't have a life to interrupt your blogging. Thank pigment for that!

Posted by: Ralph on December 29, 2004 09:02 AM

I dunno, Ralph. I have a LOT of people call me an asshole without throwing communist drek into the mix. And what's to "understand" about THAT asshole?

I understand him perfectly.

Posted by: Acidman on December 29, 2004 09:05 AM

When did "fuckoff" offer a ideological challenge?

I see accusations and pre-pubescent name calling!

Posted by: cee cee on December 29, 2004 09:48 AM

I've said it before and I'll say it again: You get the BEST trolls! LOL

Posted by: Chablis on December 29, 2004 09:55 AM

What's wrong with exploiting the earth's resources? Doesn't fuckoff do that every day he's alive? That's why God put that stuff here. And, animals are delicious, too.

Posted by: Circa Bellum on December 29, 2004 10:11 AM

Where I come from, Fuckoff's political ideology would be properly labelled "fraudulent waste of oxygen."

And KB's sentiment would be discouraged as a "waste of a perfectly good bullet."

Posted by: McGehee on December 29, 2004 12:14 PM

Rob!! Quit playing with the trolls!

Posted by: Vulgorilla on December 29, 2004 01:34 PM

Yeah, he's having fun isn't he Vulgorilla?

Gotta admit though, this was a fun one to play with...

Posted by: Key on December 29, 2004 11:05 PM

An excellent response to one who represents the ideology that has caused the worst evils, and the greatest amount of suffering, throughout human history.


Posted by: werbinox on December 30, 2004 03:02 AM
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