Gut Rumbles

November 12, 2004


As I was despamming my comments this morning, I ran across a new one. The penis-enlargement offers, prescription drugs, barnyard sex, on-line gambling, mortgage refinancing, gay anal orgies, Asian incest, direct TV and discount car rentals are common spam material. But I found a first today.


That's right. I was spammed by an outfit seeking members for a class-action suit against a drug manufacturer. I should have known that those maggots wouldn't stop with Robert Vaughn television commercials, ads on bus-stop benches and full-page color blubs in the phone book. No place is too low for them to go.

Over the past three years, I have developed a real intense dislike for lawyers. After all, they take cases such as this one.


Im speechless.....Do these people really excist..........? All i have to say is, God bless America

Posted by: Halo on November 12, 2004 01:21 PM

Wow, I used to live in Jeanette years and years ago. It is a low-income, clawing, grasping, covetous, seedy little town east of Pittsburgh.
The Tribune Review is Pittsburgh's one good paper, but it stands in the shadow of the giant Post Gazette.
Go Steelers.

Posted by: Lee on November 12, 2004 01:24 PM

Just don't forget that lawyers are necessary for a free-market system.

Posted by: Mikelx on November 12, 2004 01:33 PM

Cocksuckers are targeting me too. I'm about one step away from doing registered comments.

I can handle interracial anal stretching mature dog sex spam, but lawyers?!?!.

Everyone has their limit.

Posted by: Graumagus on November 12, 2004 02:03 PM

"I can handle interracial anal stretching mature dog sex spam, but lawyers?!?!."

I find it interesting that you include "interracial" among sex acts that many find lewd.

Why is that?

Posted by: Mikelx on November 12, 2004 03:50 PM

Lawyers invented spam. The very first mass unsolicited commercial e-mail message was for a law firm specializing in immigration cases. Google "green card lawyers".

Posted by: John Stephens on November 12, 2004 03:55 PM

What a moron. I truly hope that some day the judges in Civil courts will grow the balls to look at the plaintifs in cases like this and throw the book at them for their own negligence and stupidity. And then sanction the lawyer for filing such a ridiculous suit.

I am not, however, holding my breath.

Posted by: Mamamontezz on November 12, 2004 05:41 PM

MikeLX, it's because a good portion of the porn spam some of us gets in comments is specifically offering interracial sex porn. Gay, interracial, bi-sexual, transgender, asian, black, latina, latino, eskimo, nordic, dogs, goats, ponies, anal, oral, spanking, onanist, large groups, small groups, dwarves, obese, piss, shit, vomit, big busted, small busted, scars, big cocks, small cocks, no cocks, she-he, pearl necklaced, leather, ropes, latex, teen, pre-teen, virgin, wide-open, pierced, multi-pierced, tattooed, humiliation, domination, high-heels, furries, anime, ugly, cheerleader, jocks, thongs on men, thongs on women, parochial school girl, parochial school boy, bloody, mutilated, and the ever popular clerical.

Take your pick. Someone's ox gets gored (so to speak) in each one.

Now, will you complain because I left your favorite out, or read into this something that isn't there?

Posted by: Mamamontezz on November 12, 2004 05:51 PM

Sorry, I left out geriatric, incest, rape, and screamers. My bad.

Posted by: Mamamontezz on November 12, 2004 06:01 PM

Lawyers. I worked 31 years for a "very large" auto company. Maybe the "largest", *cough*. I used to get deposed as a fact witness (as opposed to an "expert" witness). Meaning I had to respond to questions about work I had done in the safety area - test reports, SAE papers, safety engineers working for me, etc.

My first case, "our" lawyer (but not "my" lawyer) said, "Relax, no sweat. Just remember all that is happening is they are trying to scam the company's money. All you have to do is keep your cool and tell the truth. We take care of the rest. Remember, we are right. If we weren't we would have already settled the case."

You know me, I can't resist bragging. Although illegal, all the trial lawyers had a central file of all the depositions and testimony ever done in our safety cases, and they passed it around. My depositions STOPPED the time I nailed an asshole lawyer in a lie. The rule is if they bring up anything I ever testified to, our guys could bring up anything I ever said on the subject. It was videotaped too. End of my lawyer involvement at work.

The day after I retired, I got an email from one of our big-wig lawyers. "Thanks for nailing xxxx, that was beautiful. We still bring it up during evening bar talk at court cases." One of my fondest work memories.

Posted by: Dan Pursel on November 12, 2004 07:30 PM
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