Gut Rumbles

September 10, 2004

it's all relative

Hell... everybody's gonna die of something. Why not have a good time before the reaper comes for you?

I don't want ANYBODY viewing my corpse and saying that I look good. I want 'em to grimace, turn away in disgust and say, "That's one dead-looking motherfucker. What was he? 500 years old?"

I want my package to be obviously expired when I exit the stage.


I kind of like Bill Cosby's little piece- he said that he is going to have a switch that when people step on it when viewing him it starts a recorder that says- "Don't I look good" "Don't I look natural"?

Posted by: AndyJ on September 10, 2004 09:20 AM

I have never seen anyone that looked "natural" or "good". They all looked dead with excessive makeup. We have some pretty wierd rituals.

Posted by: James Old Guy on September 10, 2004 10:40 AM

You mean that isn't how dead people naturally look?

I may cry.

Posted by: McGehee on September 10, 2004 11:39 AM

Um, didn't your package already expire and you had it refurbished?

Posted by: Mythilt on September 10, 2004 12:51 PM

What ever happened to, "Live fast, die young and have a good-looking corpse."? I did #1, but #'s 2 & 3 ain't gonna work out. Also, remember what Mantle said: "If I'd known I was going to live this long, I'd have taken better care of myself."

Quoting from memory. Errors are solely my own.

Posted by: Larry on September 10, 2004 02:39 PM

That pic is a total hoot! I am going to have to get the recent book _Eat What you Want, and die Like a Man_, I think.
and remember also the bit from Death in Bill and Ted's Excellent Adventure-- "You may be a king, or a little street sweeper, but sooner or later, You'll dance with the reaper." not to mention, "For what else does life supply, but a few good fucks, and then you die>"

Posted by: John Cunningham on September 11, 2004 12:06 AM

"...Life is not a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in one pretty and well preserved piece, but to slide across the finish line broadside, thoroughly used up, worn out, leaking oil, and shouting GERONIMO!!!"
-- Bill McKenna

Posted by: jed on September 15, 2004 01:50 AM
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