Gut Rumbles

August 29, 2004

conservative blogger

A lot of people group my blog in with the "conservative" wing of blogdom. I am not a feces-flinging leftist, but I do not consider myself to be a conservative. I once preferred the Reagan form of Republicanism over what the left had to offer, and I saw a clear line in the sand back then. But the winds of change have obscured that line and I can't see it anymore.

How can anyone call me a conservative when I like to go to Florida and walk around nekkid for a week? Get a baboon suntan on my ass and let people take pictures of me wearing nothing but a sarong? I don't believe that Jerry Falwell would approve of my behavior. Hell, my mama doesn't either, but she gave up on trying to change me a long time ago.

I believe that the war on drugs should be called off as a lost cause. I believe that ANYBODY who wants to amend the Constitution for ANYTHING should be dragged off and shot. I believe that prostitution and gambling should be legal. I disapprove of abortion from a personal standpoint, but I KNOW that no government will ever stop it from happening, so let's be reasonable about it. Abortion is not an all or nothing issue, no matter what shrieking feminists say.

I believe in holding people responsible for their own actions. I DO NOT believe that government is the answer to every problem on the face of the planet, because I read history and government is RESPONSIBLE for most of the problems it desperately wants to "solve" today. Just give them more of your money and they'll fix the problem this time.

Unlike a lot of other people, I know that government can't "give" anything to anybody that it hasn't taken from someone else first. I disobey laws that I believe are stupid all the time, but I am willing to pay the price if I am caught. I make my OWN goddam decisions. I am a free man.

I will not be a slave to government, even though that's what government expects and that's what a lot of idiots DEMAND today. I am one of the few people who dare to suggest that the Unholy Trinity of American History were Abe Lincoln, Franklin Roosevelt and Lyndon Johnson. All three wiped their asses on the US Constitution and people PRAISED them for doing so.

As I've said before--- some people are just too stupid to live free. And if THAT'S a "conservative" attitude, then I need to listen to your definition of a conservative.


Sounds to me like you're a Libertarian. Supporting states rights, small government, low taxes, individual freedom (i.e. owning guns, and smoking pot), etc, etc.

Posted by: Shane on August 29, 2004 06:19 PM

Welcome to the Libertarian party. We throw good parties. I for one am glad to have you.

a long time fan (who sadly doesn't wear red toe-nail polish)

Posted by: Janine on August 29, 2004 08:04 PM

Beat by two before me. Rats.

Yes, you sound like a right-leaning libertarian. Which is probably why I enjoy reading you so much.

Reagan was a true conservative, unlike too many of the current (R) party, who are nothing more than moderate statists--the current White House occupant included.

Posted by: Desert Cat on August 30, 2004 12:37 AM

What? You mean conservatives don't like to get nekkid?

Honestly I think people have a little from something on each side. I am a Republican but there are some things like you that I feel a little differently about than some Republicans. I'm sure there are probably some liberals who have a conservative view or two as well.

Posted by: Lori on August 30, 2004 03:23 AM

Definately a libertarian. In my eyes I am also a libertarian, and being a REAL libertarian, I don't belong to ANY party, including the LP, and vote for whoever I think will get the job done right, whether that be Democrat, Republican, or Mickey Fucking Mouse.

Posted by: Richard Miles on August 30, 2004 05:00 AM


Posted by: Fortune's Fool on August 30, 2004 06:55 AM

"Conservative" has absorbed so much libertarian that it's not what many who have yet to catch up knee jerk expect it to be.

Meanwhile, "liberal" has absorbed control freak authoritarianism more and more, which is ironic. Yet not so much, since the primary source of freedom constricting and mass death causing movements and regimes has been the left rather than the right.

Been meaning to write some comprehensive post on this one day.

Posted by: Jay Solo on August 30, 2004 09:39 AM

Yup, definite libertarian, just don't know it/won't admit it yet.
(BTW, uncapitalized libertarian means 'won't go along with ALL of the planks/policies of the The Offical National Libertarian Party (TM )'. But, you probably knew that.)

Posted by: Terry on August 30, 2004 03:31 PM

Ah, another Libertarian...


Posted by: Ogre on August 30, 2004 04:47 PM

Libertarianism is anarchism in camouflage, premised on the idea that nobody is too stupid to live free.

Conservatism (classical liberalism) recognizes a correct role for government: that to secure these rights, governments are instituted among men, deriving their just powers from the consent of the governed.

We've strayed far from that principle now. People can be forgiven for thinking that government as such is the problem; but in fact it's the wrong kind of government that plagues us.

If you revere the Constitution and the spirit of the Declaration, you're a conservative. Don't be distracted by anarchists or God-bothering busybodies.

Posted by: dipnut on August 30, 2004 05:39 PM

Cheney Vows To Attack U.S. If Kerry Elected
GREENSBORO, NC—In an announcement that has alarmed voters across the nation, Vice President Dick Cheney said Monday that he will personally attack the U.S. if Sen. John Kerry wins the next election.

Above: Cheney issues a warning to Greensboro, NC voters.
"If the wrong man is elected in November, the nation will come under a devastating armed attack of an unimaginable magnitude, one planned and executed by none other than myself," Cheney said, speaking at a rally in Greensboro, NC. "When they go to the polls, Americans must weigh this fact and decide if our nation can ignore such a grave threat."
Added Cheney: "It would be a tragedy to suffer another attack on American soil, let alone one perpetrated by an enemy as well-organized and well-equipped as I am. My colleagues and I urge voters to keep their safety in mind when they go to the polls."
Although Cheney would not comment on the details of his proposed attack on a John Kerry-led U.S., national-security experts said he possesses both the capabilities and the motivation to pose a serious threat.
"There is no question that Cheney has the financial assets and intelligence needed to pose a threat to our nation," said Peter Bergen, terrorism researcher and author of Threats And Balances: Former Executive Branch Officials And The Danger To America. "After all, this fanatic can call upon the resources of both the Republican Party and Halliburton to aid him in his assault. America would be foolish not to take his warning seriously."
After his speech, Cheney was asked to confirm his remarks.
"Make no mistake: If Kerry becomes president, no one will be safe from me," Cheney told reporters. "Businesses, places of worship, schools, public parks: No place will offer you refuge. A vote for Kerry is a vote to die in your own bed at the hands of Dick Cheney."
Stepping up to the podium after Cheney, Secretary of Homeland Security Tom Ridge vowed to increase surveillance of the vice president.
"Wherever Cheney is—whether in his office in the White House or stumping in battleground states—we will be watching him," Ridge said. "I will not rule out raising the terror-alert level, should Kerry begin to draw ahead in the polls. Every percentage point conceded to Kerry brings the nation under greater threat of attack by Cheney."
In a televised address from the White House, President Bush promised "to serve and protect the nation" by being re-elected.

Above: Cheney describes the threat he poses to the nation.
"A war against Dick Cheney would be a long, hard struggle," Bush said. "It would be a difficult battle against a shadowy nemesis who is able to hide among us, loves only death and destruction, and hates our freedom. I have the experience, the leadership, and the Republican nomination required to protect us all—myself and my family included—from Dick Cheney."
Although the effect of Cheney's remarks has yet to register in the polls, some voters report that the vice president's threats have concerned them.
"Frankly, I'm terrified," said Dwayne Cummings, a 38-year-old metal-press operator from Cleveland, OH. "The idea of getting attacked by Cheney right now, at a time when I'm out of work, uninsured, and have kids to worry about, is overwhelming. I'm not sure I can vote for Kerry anymore."
Mary Pershing, a loom-worker and lifelong Democrat from Limestone, KY, said she appreciates the government's surveillance efforts.
"At least they're warning us about the danger," Pershing said. "I've always suspected Cheney might do something dangerous someday. Now that we have confirmation of a possible attack—from someone as high-ranking as the vice president, no less—we can make moves to stop it."
Cheney's remarks quickly drew a response from the Kerry campaign.
"I urge all Americans to remain calm in the face of this new threat," Democratic vice presidential nominee John Edwards said. "Rest assured that, once elected, John Kerry has a plan to contend with any threat against our nation, whether from rogue nations, terrorists, or former vice presidents."
"Should John Kerry be elected, he and I will work with, not against, the international community," Edwards added. "I have no doubt that we would be able to assemble a coalition of nations more than willing to aid us in the war against Dick Cheney."

Posted by: WW. Jihn on October 13, 2004 02:18 PM

Alert! Don't let Dems silence this film! Bombshell 4 Dems!!
Stolen Honor is an expose on the "True Colors" of John Kerry.. It includes filmed testimony by Vietnam vets, who believe & insist that they were held longer, & tortured as a result of Kerry's public condemnation of them. There are clips on the website below to view.

Buy it, support it, but most importantly, spread the word about it to everyone you know.. The mass media has tried to hush it, & dems blackmailed the only company that had the nerve to show it.. Now they won't because their own extreme lefty share holders threatened to sell off their stock.

See here:

They want free speech for Michael Moore.. He's had it.. Are we going to let them silence our views? Grass Roots baby! Spread the word! Buy it as a gift for your favorite undecided voter, or moderate!!

Posted by: Annimated on October 21, 2004 02:01 PM

You sound like a thinking man to me. Conservtive or no.

Posted by: Alex on April 1, 2005 08:11 AM
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