Gut Rumbles

August 25, 2003

I wish...

I wish that my mama wasn't sick.

I wish that Jennifer still loved me.

I wish that I was around Quinton ALL THE TIME.

I wish that I could sleep well at night.

I wish thay Michael Fumento never wrote that shitty comment on my page. I once admired that asshole, but he changed that fact. Buttwipe.

I wish that my father was still alive. I have a lot of things I would like to discuss with him today.

I wish that my hair was not gray silver.

I wish that I never had cancer. The bionic Roscoe is effective, but I liked the natural one better.

I wish I had the chance to meet a few bloggers in person rather than just read them.

I wish that I could buy Glenn Reynolds a beer.

I wish that I could make up my mind about what I REALLY WANT TO DO. I truly do not know.

I wish that I was CERTAIN about ANYTHING ANYMORE. I knew it once, but I've lost the secret now.


Let us know when you're coming to visit.

Posted by: Mrs. du Toit on August 25, 2003 09:03 PM

Yeah, A-Man, I think we are at the age where we are wishing a lot of things. I don't like it.

For me, at least, I feel like I am "growing older, but not up."

I feel like time has become my enemy. I don't want to turn the clock back too much, after all, I'm not greedy, just about 10 yrs or so.

Posted by: Laura on August 25, 2003 09:22 PM

here's a hug. hope it helps.

Posted by: Heather on August 25, 2003 09:24 PM

I'm 56,own my own business,have grown children,and I still don't know what I want to be when I grow up,seems to be a common denomenator among the babyboomers,your in good company honey.

Posted by: nana on August 25, 2003 09:46 PM

What to do? Shit man, life tried to kick your ass and lost. It's time to enjoy the rest of it.

Posted by: Mr. Lion on August 25, 2003 09:52 PM

You could wish that you were an honest and decent man... but you don't have to, because this is already true.

Posted by: James on August 25, 2003 09:55 PM

Jennifer never "loved" you to begin with.
You fulfilled your purpose and gave her a boost up her career ladder.
Now you are no longer needed she has a child she has her career and she can sleaze around for the next 20 years.
And what has she sleazed around with?
Look at it intellectually and not emotionally and you want this back?
Like a dog returning to their vomit.
Why do men always prefer bitches?
Why should any woman ever care for you when you dishonour yourself this way?
Have some pride.

Posted by: Jenny on August 25, 2003 09:55 PM

want me to sic shatner on fumento?

heh heh heh

Posted by: mr. helpful on August 25, 2003 10:40 PM

I can understand the longing for your past family life and wishing that the ex still loved you but I seriously hope you would not consider going back if she said she did. What she did can never be excused.

Posted by: Bob on August 25, 2003 10:59 PM

P.J. O'Rourke put it best:

"What do I believe? Not much."

Posted by: Brett on August 25, 2003 11:11 PM

I wish to fuck I knew who Michael Fumento was and why so many seemingly intelligent people have their panties in a knot about whatever the fuck he thinks. He must be one of those really smart asswipes that I have yet to cross paths with. My loss....nah, Fuck em...

Posted by: Rumbear on August 25, 2003 11:23 PM

42 and I don't know what I want to do when I grow up either. Definitely a trend here.

Posted by: Jay Solo on August 25, 2003 11:40 PM

Tuesday, 9pm, crack open a beer and we'll drink one together. I know what you mean.

I wish my husband weren't having bypass surgery Wednesday.

I wish I had not listened to my parents when I was younger and studied what I WANTED and not what they thought was best.

I wish I had the balls to throw caution to the wind and jump up on Open Stage nite at Kelly's and belt out Bobbie McGee.

I wish I were a better wife and mother.

I wish I weren't so damned concerned about what other people think all the time.

9pm Tuesday, I'm gonna need that beer.

Posted by: Mamamontezz on August 26, 2003 12:18 AM

I wish my son was home from the war in Iraq.
I wish he was still little and I could tuck him in.
I, too, wish my dad was still alive.
I wish we weren't being audited tomorrow.
I wish my granny was still here to help me pick roses.
I wish I understood why people are just plain mean.
I wish they weren't.
I wish that I could get as excited about anything as I did when I was 3 or 6 or 10.
I wish I knew the 'perfect' thing to say to a man with a sad heart...

Posted by: Katherine on August 26, 2003 01:44 AM

No quarantees but, one approach to trying to find out what you want or don't want to do is apptitude and interest testing. If you have a community college or university handy they usually have a counsuling office and even courses ( Carrer Development 101 or somethin) on this subject to help students determine a major. There is usually a Johnson O'Conner Apptitude testing center in most major cities. They charge but they test the crap out of you. Most book stores have all sorts of do it your self interest and apptitude test books.

Also you could do what my brother used to do when he was depressed. He would go the Methodist Singles Sunday School, go their out of church activities and "Cry Havoc and let loose the Roscoe of lust ! " for about six months.

Then there are the Russian mail-order bride websites.

Posted by: toad on August 26, 2003 05:48 AM

I wish my husband didn't have Multiple Sclerosis (24 out of our 27 yrs of marriage); I wish he was strong and viral like he should be at his age, instead of getting weaker & weaker as time goes on.
I wish my oldest daughter, Jennifer, had not died as an infant.
I wish my mom & dad were alive.
I wish I had gotten along better with them when they were alive & not argued with my dad a couple of days before he died, knowing that he was still angry with me when he died.
I wish we had won the lottery.

Posted by: Laura on August 26, 2003 07:50 AM

I wish I had more time to spend with my two sons...

I wish my husband didn't work 7 days a week for 9 months of the year...

I wish my daughter did not have to eat through a tube, have heart defects, breathing problems and need to wear hearing aids and glasses...

I wish I could stay as happy and positive all the time in my own life as my daughter does with everything she deals with...

I wish that governments would stop wasting so much goddamn money on sending people to Mars & the Moon and use that money to find cures for diseases that are killing people mercilessly...

I wish I were lying on a sailboat floating gently on the water with the sun warming me...

I wish I could sleep....ALOT....

Wow, I'm really pensive today.... :)

Posted by: Lisa on August 26, 2003 09:50 AM

I wish you'd come over for a few cold beers so we could shoot the shit and solve the problems of the world.

Posted by: on August 26, 2003 10:00 AM

Michael Fumento is a fucking lawyer, what the hell did you expect. Can not believe you actually has some respect for a piece of shit lawyer.

Posted by: James on August 26, 2003 10:28 AM

I wish I could have my Mom back, even for just one hour so she could hold my youngest son who will never get to see her.
I wish I could have fixed all the things I did to dissapoint my parents before my Mom passed on.
I wish I had the willpower to get my ass in better physical shape so my kids won't have to put me in the ground before I get to be a grandpa.
I wish I could get some sleep sometime this week.

Posted by: Graumagus on August 26, 2003 11:41 AM

Is this depressing or what?

It's like that cartoon that my husband has framed on the wall of his office:

It shows a auditorium full of empty seats with just one guy sitting there in the middle of it all and above the stage is a banner saying:


Posted by: Laura on August 26, 2003 11:48 AM

Always start by wishing for more wishes.

Posted by: Ron Hardin on August 26, 2003 12:26 PM

"I wish that I was CERTAIN about ANYTHING ANYMORE. I knew it once, but I've lost the secret now."

Ah, grasshopper! Now you are ready to live! Life is mostly UNCERTAIN. Only in the U.S. do people express dismay at their wishes being unfulfilled. In most of the world, people aren't certain they'll live to see another week.

I wish I could have the grace to work in a metal scrap yard in Mexico City until I was 80+ years old, stooped with the hardness of the work, pious enough to go to church, tired enough to sleep during the service, but peaceful enough to smile pleasantly at everyone, pitch in with activities, tell great stories, sigh and go home alone, wake up and go work scrap metal another day just so I can eat and sleep somewhere dry and safe...and have a little left over to buy ice cream for the occasional polite child who smiled at me and reminded me of my grandkids far away in Atlanta.

Yeah, Acidman, you're lucky. But we'll spot you a moment now and then to piss and moan, cuz every man's burdens are his own.


Posted by: Joan Varga on August 26, 2003 12:33 PM

This is the first time I've ever posted here and I just wanted to say today's post really touched me. :)

Posted by: Melissa The Profane Princess on August 26, 2003 02:57 PM

Funny, one of my biggest wishes is that people would spend a lot MORE on sending people to the Moon and Mars. Too late for me, but maybe not my grandkids...

Posted by: Bruce on August 26, 2003 03:45 PM

I wish that you could just be happy.

Posted by: Dawn on August 26, 2003 06:09 PM

Don't we all just wish we could be happy....

Posted by: Backseat on August 26, 2003 06:41 PM

Life will work for you when you realize that troubles come to pass, not to stay.

Posted by: Barbara on August 26, 2003 06:47 PM

I wish that when you find the magic spell to finally get rid of the BC you'd share it with the rest of us who can't put down the torch.

Posted by: Ruby on August 26, 2003 07:05 PM

You know, I too was at first dismayed when I began to realize that I no longer knew everything. But my children did, so I figured it was alright. Now even they are beginnng to doubt, but now they have kids and we're sure that they will clue us in. It reminds me of what my college English professor used to quote all the time, "There is only one song of life, yet we each rush forth to sing it as if it had never been heard before.".

Posted by: Dippy3 on August 26, 2003 07:05 PM

People who are certain of things are asses. They go around trying to pass laws to make everyone else live by their certainties. Like "I'm certain homosexuals are going to hell, so let's outlaw sodomy" or "I'm certain that global warming is caused by SUV's, so let's sign the Kyoto treaty". Lots of "certain" people on the far ends of the political spectrum. Here in the middle, most of us just muddle through the best we can.

Give Roscoe my love, 'kay?

Posted by: shell on August 26, 2003 08:16 PM

I wish I lived closer to you, so I could come see you in person and give you the biggest hug ever.

Posted by: Amy on August 27, 2003 04:04 PM
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