Gut Rumbles
 

May 12, 2003

chefdom

I have decided that if I ever meet sugarmama. I AM GOING TO COOK.

Or maybe not....

I like to eat a lot of things raw, although sushi isn't one of them. I like to eat:

Corn on the cob, raw. Fresh corn is delicious and crunchy before it's cooked. Before this year (when I decided not to plant a garden), I always grew several rows of corn. I liked to shuck it and eat a couple of ears on my back porch before I took the rest inside. Ripe, fresh corn tastes good, even without salt and pepper.

Potatoes. I always grew the purple new potatoes and I liked to wash them off, cut the golf-ball-sized ones in half, dose them with salt and pepper and eat them raw. They are crunchy, too. They taste really earthy.

Raw squash. I know how to cook it about a dozen different ways, but if you pick the baby ones, before they get too seedy, you can eat them like a carrot. They are sweet.

Raw eggs. I don't want to hear any samonella crap from anyone who eats sushi. You don't know where that goddam fish has been. My raw egg comes in a sealed container, called a SHELL! I crack about three into a glass, add a dollop of milk, some salt, pepper and Tabasco Sauce, then whip it with a fork until it looks like a yellow milkshake. Then, I drink the whole thing in about three gulps. Breakfast of Champions.

Raw oysters. Hell, EVERYBODY eats those, don't they?

Raw sweet potatoes. I like to peel them, cut them into narrow strips and dip them in Ranch dressing. I can eat about three raw sweet potatoes when I get started. I DO NOT like them cooked.

Raw cabbage. I'm good for about half a head at a time. I cut the cabbage sideways so it comes out in big, skinny hunks, then I dose it with salt and pepper and put it on a paper plate. It is very good with white zinfandel.

Women. Well, never mind about that. But THEY are good with white zinfandel, too.

Comments

I'll eat what you're cookin'!

I like raw corn and cabbage (but not in that nasty cole slaw).

I might eat sushi (75% of which is NOT RAW), but as you can see from my mother's day post, I cooked an entire meal of NOT RAW foods for my family.

Posted by: sugarmama on May 12, 2003 08:41 PM

The way you say "I eat raw oysters" implies that some people cook them..? I've never heard of that.

Posted by: Jack on May 13, 2003 03:21 AM

Jack, that's how they get the stuff they make truck tires out of.

Posted by: McGehee on May 13, 2003 07:23 AM

I don't shun raw eggs for fear of salmonella. I shun them cause I think the texture is REVOLTING!

Posted by: dragonfly jenny on May 13, 2003 04:02 PM

Texture is in the mouth of the beholder, Jenny. And I LIKE raw eggs.

Posted by: Acidman on May 13, 2003 04:38 PM

How high is your blood pressure? Salt & pepper this, salt and pepper that? A man after my own heart. I use the coarse Kosher salt.

Posted by: Aunt S on May 14, 2003 09:51 AM

Ew, ew, ew.

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