Gut Rumbles
 

July 07, 2011

a good saturday

Originally published September 27, 2004

I took the boys to Wal-Mart this morning and bought them some really monster-infested game for the Playstation II. They were bored with it in ten minutes, so I played football in the yard with them until they got bored with that, too, and they went back inside to play the video game again. They have the attention span of sand gnats.

While they were slaying fake monsters, I cut my grass. I may not have to do that again until next spring because we're supposed to get some really crisp fall weather beginning Monday. I am ready for it. I am weary of sweating my Cracker ass off every day and never taking a piss at work because my SKIN does the pissing for me. This summer wasn't as hot as some I can recall, but it's been a miserable bitch just the same.

Jack sat on my favorite pair of reading glasses and broke them. That's my fault for leaving them within reach of his careless ass. I could give that boy an anvil to play with and he would find a way to break it.

I boiled a half-bushel of green peanuts today. I paid an outrageous price for them, but the season is running out and I want boiled peanuts in my freezer for Super Bowl Sunday. Quinton, Jack and I mowed down on a passel of them, just to make sure they were fit to eat, and we agreed that they were excellent. I boiled them outside on my propane cooker and had half the neighborhood drop by to smell them. Fresh green peanuts give off a VERY pleasant aroma when they are boiling.

I'm going to let the peanuts that we didn't eat soak over night, so that they absorb a maximum amount of salty water, and I'll bag them up tomorrow. Hell, I'll probably have some for breakfast.

I also bought God's Own Flashlight at Wal-Mart today. That sucker takes FOUR D-cell batteries and has an adjustable lens that goes from laser-beam to full moon. It's big and heavy enough that you could shine the light on an enemy and use the light to stove in his head. I like that sucker.

So do the boys. They are out running the woods in the dark with it as I write. I just hope that Jack doesn't find a way to break it.

That was my Saturday.

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