April 09, 2008
Lawyers at work
Originally published May 19, 2003
Sue-happy attorneys do so much good in the world. They've managed to shut down a water park in my beloved state of Georgia, right before the summer heat wave, which lasts from June until October.
Families and kids who found summertime fun and enjoyment each year at the Krystal River Water Park in Evans will have to find somewhere else to cool off in the months ahead.
Why did the insurance company do that?
The answer is clear. The insurance company knows that if some idiot kid violates every safety rule posted in the park, does something incredibly stupid and breaks his fool neck, a sharp lawyer can find twelve dipwits with which to staff a jury to find the water-park liable for the dumbass's injuries and award several badzillion dollars in their verdict. It happens all the time.
I have served on juries where I heard people say, "Aw, c'mon. Give the poor client a break. It's not like it's YOUR money."
No, I don't have to write the check for your generosity right then and there, but I'll pay my portion of it later. Everybody will, eventually.
But what's happened with regard to the Evans water park, and many other such playground facilities, is that insurance rates are keyed to protect the business from rapacious lawyers.
I don't blame lawyers for that. I blame jurors. I blame idiots who enter the courtroom with that "Who Want To Be A Millionaire?" attitude, believing that they're handing out winning lottery tickets using somebody else's money. The dumbasses just don't get it.
It IS your money.
Lawyers are just taking advantage of an opportunity. A crooked used-car salesman will screw an idiot for $200. A lawyer will DAMN SURE screw society for a couple of million dollars. In both cases, they couldn't screw ANYBODY without the assistance of idiots.
Don't blame this summer's dried up water park in Evans on insurers. Blame it on our litigious society.
Tort reform in a Congress owned and operated by lawyers is about as likely as the second coming of Bejus. A lot of that evil tobacco money is at work stalling any kind of tort reform. Lawyers know a Golden Goose when they see one, and you don't kill that money-laying bastard.
And nothing will EVER change as long as jurors believe that they are playing with other people's money at some cosmic craps table in a lawsuit.
All content © Rob Smith