Gut Rumbles
 

June 09, 2007

I have a dream!

Originally published December 6, 2004

I'll post before and after pictures when the meal is done. I'm gonna throw a recipe out here:

Acidman's Ultimate Rib-Eye Steak.

It goes like this:

* Buy a big, fat, marbled rib-eye about 2" thick.

* Throw that sucker in a plastic baggie, add soy sauce, black pepper, lemon pepper, fresh garlic and a dash of MSG. (I don't measure that crap. Just make it LOOK right.) Then rub the baggie around in your hands until you have all that juicy stuff smeared all over the steak. When you're finished playing with your meat, throw it into the refrigerator overnight, in the plastic bag. Let it brood.

* Get really hungry about 1:00 the next day. Light your charchol grill.

* If you knew what you were doing, you already had a Vidalea onion, a small bell pepper and some portabella mushrooms on hand. If you DIDN'T KNOW, run to the store and get some NOW, while the charchol is getting ready.

(Warning ALERT!!! Wash all ingredients before going any farther!!! I don't want a bullshit lawsuit on my hands.)

* Whack a softball-sized Vidalea onion in half. Cut 1/2 the onion into thin rings.

* Cut the bell pepper into thin strips.

* Slice the portabellas into nice chunks, about the size of the end of your thumb.

* Put the steak on a big piece of aluminium foil. Throw the onion, the pepper and the mushrooms on top of the steak, add a dash of salt and 1/4 a stick of butter.

* Fold the aluminium foil carefully around the steak, poke a couple of holes in the foil, then throw that rascal on the grill and put a lid on it. Go bake a potato. Take a piss. Relax for about 25 minutes.

* Then, go pull that package off the grill and pour it onto a plate. Hot Damn! THAT'S good eating.

Baked potatoes and salad are optional. But if you can't cook THIS delicious meal, you need to be dragged off and shot.

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