April 25, 2006
I've always asserted that I am a dog person. Dogs like me and I like them. Dogs hate cats and I do, too. Dogs can lick their own balls and I can... never mind. Let's not go there.
Despite my affinity for canines, I will admit that dogs often do really stupid things.
I once watched a pedigreed dalmation (REALLY DUMB DOGS!!!) get its head stuck in an empty plastic pickle jug (the dog smelled bait shrimp residue in the jug, poked his head inside to get a better sniff and then couldn't get his head out. He found himself... uh... in a pickle). The dog tried shaking the jug off, but when that didn't work, he took off running at warp speed, even though he couldn't see where he was going.
I don't know what the damn dog was thinking. Was he trying to OUTRUN the jug? Was he thinking at ALL? Who knows?
If the dog had a plan, it worked perfectly, because he sped head-first (at about 40 MPH) into the 2" X 4" legs of a wooden picnic table. The collision sounded like a baseball bat smacking a home run ball. The dog knocked itself silly and went rolling across the grass, but the jug was dislodged in the process.
It's just a good thing that the dog had a really hard head because that lick would have killed a lesser animal. It must have taught the dog a lesson because, despite being thick as a brick, he never stuck his head in a shrimp jug again.
Dumb dogs. Gotta love 'em.
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