Gut Rumbles
 

January 30, 2006

something missing

I left the Crackerbox at 7:00 tonight and drove to Springfield to watch another basketball game. Quinton's team lost, 30-24. I didn't enjoy the game much, because I had some sawed-off, shitass, brat-boy kid using the bleacher seats as a playground and ME as his personal punching bag. The feral little bastard kicked me in the kidneys TWICE as he climbed and jumped the seats like a fucking monkey on meth. Before halftime, I wanted to drag him off and shoot him.

Of course, his mama was a master of discipline. "Honey, stop that," she whined. "You're bothering that man." The kid paid no attention and continued his antics. After I received my second kick in the kidneys, I wanted to drag the mama off and shoot HER, too, for raising a white trash child. I finally moved to a different seat.

Quinton didn't show up for the game tonight. He was complaining of a sore throat on Saturday, so I suppose he was too sick to play. I guess. Maybe. Probably. I don't know. By the time I got home, it was too late to call him on a school night. Past his bedtime.

It would have been nice to have someone call ME and let me know that he wasn't coming to the game before I drove all the way to Springfield to watch him play, but I don't get "nice" from his mama. I get sharp sticks in the eye from her.

Speaking of sharp sticks in the eye, my night vision is REALLY terrible. I can barely see to drive after dark anymore. I once thought the problem was having my retinas marinated in vodka all the time and a severe vitamin deficiency from seldom eating anything more nutritious than Bloody Marys, but the problem seems worse now than before I went into rehab. If the road didn't have white lines down the side, I would have driven into a ditch more than once by now. These backwoods roads where I live are DARK at night.

When I mentioned the problem during my visit with my family this past weekend, my brother's wife suggested, "Rob, you might be developing cataracts. Loss of night vision is one of the first symptoms. Have you had your eyes checked lately?"

Great. I don't have enough shit physically wrong with me already. Let's throw some cataracts in there like nuts on a sundae. I can't WAIT to see what's gonna be the cherry on top of THAT dish.

Shit. I suppose I should make an appointment with an eye doctor...

Comments

Cataracts aren't the dismal problem they once were. Most times if you do need 'em removed it's an outpatient procedure. Go have your eyes checked.

Posted by: Gerry N. on January 30, 2006 10:41 PM

Might be a good idea to go get those eyes checked, hon. Not that you need it, like you said.

But still.

Posted by: Gina on January 30, 2006 11:04 PM

Oops wrong email. .net not .com.

My bad.

Posted by: Gina on January 30, 2006 11:06 PM

Try wearing a pair of yellow shooting glasses at night. I find it really helps with the glare, and having everything one color makes things a lot sharper too.

That see, Get Thee to an Eye Doctor, and it sounds like you need to see an Opthamologist MD, not an Optometrist....

Posted by: RickT on January 30, 2006 11:30 PM

Forget all the advice and do what you know you were going to do anyway. "Get the peepers checked", we only get one set and like the other poster said, it's an outpatient procedure in most cases and at the most you will have some pretty nurse stroking you for 24 hours. You can handle that.

Posted by: scrapiron on January 30, 2006 11:42 PM

Ditto on all that but get your blood sugar checked also while you're at it. Even a glucose and/or insulin tolerance test wouldn't hurt with your family history of diabetes. I'm sure they probably checked it when they were working you up in rehab but a little more thorough investigation is in order if you're having vision changes. Fluctuations in blood glucose can wreak havoc with your vision. A good eye doc will check for both. Cataract surgery is a piece of cake these days -- in'n'out, bing-bang. Non che male.

Posted by: Marianne on January 31, 2006 02:04 AM

I have always had trouble driving at night in unlit areas and my eyes are checked every year and I have no cataracts. Often I have to focus on the white lines because ahead of me I see very little. I use high-beams whenever possible. I'm not "old", I'm only 48, so while I need a wee bit o' the bifocals for reading, the eyes are hanging in there.

Always good to get them checked and there is a great vitamin out there called "Ocuvite" that is for the eyes.

Posted by: A Different Kim on January 31, 2006 02:21 AM

Your ex-wife is a bitch of the first order.

Posted by: LL on January 31, 2006 07:02 AM

Get your eyes checked..but if all the above suggestions don't work, try this:

I never had a problem with night driving until last year so I wear those stupid looking yellow lens "sun" glasses. They cut the glare of oncoming headlights but also brighten the dark areas.

Posted by: Maggie on January 31, 2006 07:36 AM

Yes, go to the doc. The same thing with night vision was happening to my Dad. Diagnosis? Cataracts in both eyes.

Posted by: Deliverance on January 31, 2006 07:38 AM

Cateracts are no big thing anymore. I had both eyes fied about a year and a half ago and wish now I had done it years ago. It is a simple procedure where the surgeon pulervises the natural lens with ultrasound and vacuums it out and implants an artificial lens. I was damn near blind before the surey and come out with 20-20 in each eye without glasses. First time in my life I could look in the mirror and see my ugly mug without the specs. Down in this country the going rate is about $3500 per eye. But my insurance paid all but about fifty bucks per.

Posted by: GUYK on January 31, 2006 01:23 PM

Yeah go to the optomologist. It must be covered under your insurance and eyesight is nothing to fool around with. As for that bitch ex of yours, somebody should slap her down for being such a cunt. She knew damn well you would go. Every time she pulls a stunt like this, I feel like driving down and filing a few motions in family court. It's wouldn't be that difficult to make her life a living legal hell.

Posted by: Libby on January 31, 2006 03:20 PM
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