April 25, 2004
I absolutely LOVE the vivid images that Southerners throw into their speech. You can sample a few good ones here, but I know a lot more of them.
*He's as lazy as a cut dog
*He was as happy as a dead pig in sunshine
*That woman could suck a golf ball through 30' of garden hose. Take the chrome right off a trailer hitch, too
*That shit was hard as Chinese arithmetic
*He was as happy as a dog with two dicks
*If brains were gunpowder, he couldn't blow his nose
Too few people in this country understand the meaning of "y'all," "yonder" and "directly," too.
How about "uglier'n a barrel of assholes"?
"Damn, it's hotter in here than 2 rats fuckin' in a wool sock."
lol now that DrPhil has gained in popularity, some of those southern sayin's are makin' it up north.
I'll be visiting my sothern roots next week. I'll be so glad to be back in a land where boys are taught to be polite and men will give you to eye no matter what you look like. ; )
When my granny saw somebody do something stupid she would say,
"that boy ain't got no do right about hisself" or if you asked her what was for supper she would say:
"peas n pone, eat let alone"..meaning peas n cornbread, you don't like it, don't eat it.
My daughter was "y'all"-ing within a few months of moving to the south -- cracked me up the first time I actually heard it come out of her mouth over the phone. The one I real liked though when I was out there in Feb (sorry we didn't have time to get back up to Savannah for your Blog Meet -- too many other peoples' schedules to deal w/) is "Fuck all y'all" -- love it! I've kinda adopted that as my own personal motto! Used to know a guy who would say "Ain't had this much fun since the pigs ate my baby brother." WTF??
You need to add "and what not". Course, that might be unique to N.C.
Days of the week - as they are heard in most parts of Kentucky.
Your Southernisms reminded me of a good book. If you're looking for a viciously funny read, try Florence King's "Southern Ladies and Gentlemen." No one is immune from her scathing barbs. Enjoy!
. . . and suck-start a Harley.
hotter'n a fresh-fucked fox in a forest fire
my dick's so hard a cat couldn't scratch it