Gut Rumbles
 

January 30, 2004

oogly boogly

I once witnessed a scene similiar ro this one a long time ago. It happened in my bedroom after one two many Krystal cheeseburgers and a bottle of peppermint schnapps.

I knew that she was hot to trot, but I didn't realize that she was about to go nuclear. Man, that shit ran my dog off for three days and ruined my waterbed. We had to tug the carcass out of the house using a chain a and 4-wheel drive druck.

I let some of my crabber friends cut all they wantd for bait, and the local wildlife got in a nibble ot two, also. But that thing was getting awfully funky after three days. Flies came from miles around to enjoy the show. We had to put a stop to this.

We bought a bucket of fuel oil and collected a truckload of sticks from the woods. We built a raging pyre on his ass and cooked him down to bones. By then, we dug a whole deep enough with shovels in to bury him in the yard.

That was ugly work and the place stuck like dead fish for a month.

Comments

This blog used to be one of the best on the net. Even if you didn't agree with the opinion it would be very well written. The last few weeks has been nothing but post after post of obfuscated ramblings. Its a pity.

Posted by: Bill on January 30, 2004 10:37 AM

WTF?

It's useless to comment.

Insert cricket chirps {here}.

Posted by: Joan of Argghh! on January 30, 2004 10:42 AM

OMG, YUCK, PUKE, GAG.

I guess the brain is the first thing to go.

Posted by: James Old GUY on January 30, 2004 10:49 AM

Acidman,

Well, Iím not much for piling on so Iíll leave the ďanal-cranial impactionĒ accusations to others. That said, Iíve visited this blog for the better part of the past year. Two reasons Rob; first, your wit, perseverance, and dogma were (are?) entertaining and insightful and in some cases instructive. The second, well, weíre homeboys Rob. You see I spent my formative years in two golden triangles. Take a map of southeast Georgia and connect the dots among Savannah, Statesboro and St. Simons Is, and there ainít many places that I havenít taken a beer piss. I know your neighborhood, your people, your red dirt roads (slicker than pig shit when wet) and those bars on River Street. Iíve even banged out Jimmy Buffet tunes along that cobbled street for a few dollars and a pretty smile. The second golden triangle? Well, she and I had a deep and meaningful relationship and Öum ÖerÖ she was blondÖ

Anyway.

Many people here have voiced concern and I bring no special credentials to add except for one. Iím a fan of this blog and of the man who created it. Where is he?

Posted by: Hal on January 30, 2004 10:51 AM

I know where he is, I think. Euphemistically, he's trying to recover from Jamaica. I just had to do this myself, but I was not gone so long. I sounded much worse, though, at the time.

Just to clear this exploding gut syndrome up, Rob, how did you get a whale into your water bed? Not that I wouldn't put it past you.

Posted by: Ga-ne-sha on January 30, 2004 11:12 AM

Actually, the crass, putrid, and utterly nauseating nature of this post leads me to believe that he might be feeling more himself. ; )

Posted by: Key on January 30, 2004 12:53 PM

Very insightful, Key. We must stand behind Rob as he works this out. Huh, what's that buzzing in my brain? What you say? OK, maybe not directly behind him. Unlike the hapless whale, Rob still has a pressure release valve intact -- I hope.

Posted by: Ga-ne-sha on January 30, 2004 01:37 PM

Can we all get past the typos and move on please. So he got fucked up in Jamaica - who doesn't?

Posted by: Anna on January 30, 2004 02:07 PM

As far as the disgusting post - seriously nauseating.

There was an article on Yahoo a few weeks back about an exploding deer. Damn, I can't find it now.

Posted by: Anna on January 30, 2004 02:09 PM

It amazes me, that all these complaints by "intellectuals", seem to be very self centered and selfish. Show some love, people ...............or change the channel.

Posted by: ken on January 30, 2004 04:55 PM

That picture reminds me of the births of my beloved daughters.

Posted by: Velociman on January 30, 2004 05:19 PM

An interesting subject for a scrimshaw...

Posted by: Brett on January 30, 2004 07:48 PM

Velociman, that was funny. Did they come down the canal, or just burst forth as the surgeon was making the skin incision. The politically correct now call the latter route a "C Birth", so that the afflicted women will not feel the lesser for not having a "real" birth. Only the pc can think these things up.

Posted by: Ga-ne-sha on January 30, 2004 09:25 PM

oogly boogly - nickname for my dog. How about that... He is a bona-fide trip. I was gonna go to work today but had anal glaucoma (could not see my ass going to work).

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