November 17, 2003
how do I phrase this...delicately?
I receive a lot of emails asking me for links. I usually try to oblige, even though I've never used that tactic to build my traffic. I just write, and I've always believed that if I put enough crap on the wall, some of it would stick and people would come back to look at the mess again later.
But some people just aren't as adventurous as I am. Take this guy, for example. I write a lot of posts about my son. He means a great deal to me. But I really don't expect a lot of readers to be interested in a series of pictures featuring only HIM. I don't believe that Brendon's home page is going to bring a lot of readers back to his site. Sorry, brother, but that's the unvarnished truth.
What did this one say? "Everybody stops to look at a train wreck." Yes, I believe that they do. But they DON'T stop to look at cute baby pictures, no matter how much those pictures mean to YOU. I prefer to make my site a train wreck.
I don't want to tell anyone how to blog. I do what I do because it feels perfectly natural to me. Some people seem to like what I write. Others damn well don't, and I've encountered more than my fair share of trolls along the way because of that fact.
But this blog is what it is, and I'm not going to change it. I write because I want to write. I have a lot to say on a wide variety of subjects. I read a lot. I think a lot. I'm full of shit a lot, but I don't let that fact slow me down. I just post what's on my mind at the time. I leave it up to the readers to accept it or not.
This blog has cost me a great deal more just than the price I pay for bandwidth and a domain name. I am not at liberty to discuss that issue right now, but I make no apologizies for anything I've written here. It's ME on this page, as anyone who has met me in person will testify. I may be a little less corrosive in person than I am on the blog, but Acidman is EXACTLY what he claims to be. I couldn't live my life any other way.
If you want me to link you, write something from your gut. Say what's on your mind and let the chips fall where they may. Stir some shit. DO NOT send me pictures of your baby in a high chair with clever captions under the pictures. Save that crap for Grandma and Grandpa. That little shit in the high chair may grow up to be a mass-murderer some day. I ain't real impressed unless you write about THAT possibility.
If you're going to blog, then fucking BLOG. Nobody gives a shit about your precious baby in the high chair.
Okay... that's as delicate as I can be on this subject.
I appreciate the mention you gave me in your blog. I tried to take what people said and make something useful out of it. I didn't intend to do a complete overhaul, but once I got started, I got carried away. It may still be a bit too girly for some folks. But what the heck, you can't please everybody. I try to balance what I write about. I love a good political debate. I don't talk too much about my family because it tends to get me into trouble. Everything else is open season.
I come here, because it's never boring. Besides that guy in the picture is cute and I like cute guys.
You're okay, Wanda. Your look is your option. At least you know HOW to fix it.
I'm aesthetically challenged, so I'm hoping the content makes up for it.
Thanks for the link, Acidhead! I scrambled to update once I realized that I was linked by someone who's had over 500,000 hits!!
CONGRATS! That's pretty decent ego-food!
I kinda like looking at pictures of people's babies, actually, and hearing about their kids, and their day, and whatnot. As long as it's not all they have in their blog. I like the newsy, this is my life kinda crap, just as much as I like people who write about current affairs, news, and that kinda stuff. But I'm pretty easy to please. I write about my day, what I'm thinkin' and what I want to write about, if people come back or they link me, great, if not.. I don't give a rat's ass.
(damn, here I am again)
>>This blog has cost me a great deal more just than the price I pay for bandwidth and a domain name.
None of my business, but I had a hunch you'd been holding something back. Hope it all turns out OK for you.
I had just a little taste myself of what blogging can cost you. Lotsa assholes in this world. Better to be an anonymous coward myself, what with all the other anonymous cowards out there.
Wow man, that didn't feel like holding much back... well, for the record, he's had about 110,000 pages read in his first three months, 30% of readership is return readers. I've known all kinds of crotchity dudes who never understood what is so damn special about a cute kid. That's cool, it's nothing against you, it's a guy thing as I chalk it up.
I'm going to continue linking to you as I have for the past 5 months because I can still like you and your blog while holding seperately that you were a total dick about my work and my son. With the photos, the writing, the photoshop, sheeyot man I put a lot of work into it. I'm okay with that, it's not for everybody. Neither is your site, but you revel in those who don't like you. I'm not quite that way.
I'm with HackJammer, here. I know there's something goin' on Rob isn't talking about. I can just feel it every time I come here.
(Just glad to know that whatever it IS, isn't messin' ya up too badly.)
The "Hi, please link to my blog I just started it yesterday" thing gets on my nerves too. I read someone's blog for a while and if I keep coming back, THEN I will blogroll it.
P.S. I like Key, she is sassy!
Just started yesterday, huh? Okay, for the benefit of those commenting who haven't looked at it, there are 110 articles and about 220 photos. I'm not talking about cheeseball MS Paint jobs, full on PhotoShop processing. The site isn't a crackerbox job, it was a custom build from the ground up, complete with forums, syndicated headline feeders and an automated subscription. To imply it's a new site or some hack job isn't insulting, it's mistaken. I have much love in my heart, so I forgive.
For the record, here's the full text of the email I sent;
"Hi, I've been linking to your fine snapshot of contemporary functional borderline insanity since July, and was wondering if you'd be interested in linking back to www.perplexingtimes.com... of course, either way I'd kind of like your feedback on it."
If that counts as begging for a link, then asking your boss for a raise is panhandling. I love my son very much and regularly get positive feedback from new readers. I admire the degree of repeat readership your site enjoys and while I imagine it's much higher than mine (about 30%, as I said,) it, like the junior journalist in question, is still growing.
Perplexing Times was Cool Site of the Day and Yahoo pick of the day. Those are feats. Getting slammed in here? Well, I think anybody could pull that off.
I appreciate that coming from you. I also appreciate the fact that I haven't been SLAUGHTERED for my html-illiteracy.
(I trust the new kids get a bit of a grace period...)
So Cool Site of the Day and Yahoo Pick of the Day wasn't enough?
How should I put this... bluntly?
Huh? Homey say what? It's like I'm talking to goldfish here.
I'm sorry that you don't have custody of your son, but I'm not sorry that I do. I have it because I fought my ass off. Baby-mama made up lies and stories about me and disappeared with him. I in turn dug up facts with proof. When I stood before the commissioner he ordered full custody to me and demanded immediate return of my son.
You see, some things are worth fighting for that are not online. Venom on the web is akin to physical threats from a dude in a wheelchair. If you love your son, don't tell us, go show him. I spend every day with my boy. I never get tired of it and we are best friends. No one has ever questioned my commitment to my boy. My money IS where my mouth is. Do you even have money?
As for this idea that I'm begging favor from you, get over it. Alexa.com shows my traffic eclipses yours, even though your twice as old. I guess if you write from your heart you'll have good traffic, no? You have nothing that interests me. I wanted your opinion of my site, and I got it. I didn't expect your voice to be that of a disenchanted non-custodial father. With that in mind I should have known you'd hate the site, it's really more geared for people who have kids, not people like you.
Sorry for flaming on your site, it wasn't my intention. It's a matter of setting the record straight.
It is never a mistake to say good-bye.
I can't understand why a person will take a year to write a novel when he can easily buy one for a few dollars.
A little foolishness, enough to enjoy life and a little wisdom to avoid the errors, that will do
You do a good work, keep it going
It's never right to say always, and always wrong to say never.
I criticize by creation -- not by finding fault.